"Sucker"

Sucker

Rating: NC-17 for graphic male-male sex

Pairings: Backstreet Boys/*NSYNC/O-Town

Disclaimer: The young men who comprise the Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, and O-Town are their own people. The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life. This writing is a work of fiction. I make no money from this venture.

Continued from part forty-two...

Dan wasn’t answering his cell phone. Justin rang the doorbell.

The door opened.

“You’re a whore,” Jacob said. “You’re a slut. You’re everything you call them and worse. You’re a bitch, Justin, and you’re a cunt, and you’re-”

Justin took a step back.

“Great,” Jacob said. He sighed, scratching his hair. “Whatever. Come on in. I’ll see if Dan’s awake.”

Justin waited until Jacob started walking away before he entered the house. He’d been right to avoid coming here. He hadn’t wanted to show up at all, but AJ’s instructions had been specific. AJ probably wouldn’t mind if he made Dan come to his house, though. Maybe when Dan came down, he’d ask Dan to go home with him.

Jacob came back downstairs. “You can go on up.”

“Thanks.” Justin edged around Jacob, then hurried up the stairs. He really hadn’t been ready to see Jacob again. The memory of the terror, the anger, the loss of control - - he wasn’t ready to deal with it, not yet.

He knocked on Dan’s door and heard, “Come on in.” Justin slipped inside, closing the door again. The bedside lamp was lit, and Dan was pulling on a T-shirt over sweatpants.

Justin smiled. “You didn’t have to get dressed just for me.”

“That’s good to know.” Dan sat on the bed. “C’mere. You okay?”

“The guys are all busy, but everyone seems to think that I need around-the-clock supervision, so I thought I’d see what you’re up to,” Justin said, sitting beside him.

“If I’d known you were coming, I would’ve met you at the door,” Dan said. “You’re okay with seeing Jacob?”

“Are you inside my brain?” Justin asked.

“No, but you haven’t seen him since the last time you were here, so it makes sense that it might be weird to meet up with him again,” Dan said.

“It was…weird,” Justin admitted. “I didn’t freak out or anything. He seems okay.” It had been hard, but Justin was used to pretending things were better than they really were.

“He may never be your number one fan, but he’s taking it pretty well,” Dan said.

Justin ran his fingers through Dan’s hair, tidying it. “I woke you up.”

“You know I don’t mind.”

It would be selfish to drag Dan out of bed and across town. “I’ll let you sleep.”

“You want to stay?”

Yes. “I’ll be okay. I’ll take myself home and-”

“And not get to sleep, or wake up screaming,” Dan said. “Do you want me to come with you?”

Justin weighed his own hesitation at playing slumber party with O-Town against playing diva and taking over Dan’s life. The lighting wasn’t great, which might have been deliberate, but he could see marks on Dan’s neck. Like the marks on AJ’s neck. Whatever Dan and AJ were doing together, Dan was dealing with AJ to protect him. Dan protected him, slept with him, memorized poetry for him, put up with his emotional ups and downs - - he wasn’t a barrel of laughs lately, and he’d attacked Dan’s best friend, and his own friendship with Dan was pretty much all about him and not at all about Dan. It was entirely a one-way relationship. The least he could do was let Dan sleep at home for once.

“Was it a hard question?” Dan asked with a smile.

Justin met Dan’s eyes directly. “I wish I could be a better friend to you.”

“Do you hear me complaining?” Dan asked.

“You never complain about anything, anyway,” Justin said.

Dan laughed. “Doesn’t that make me easier to be around?”

“That, and a couple other things.” Justin kicked his shoes off, reaching for his socks.

“You want to stay here?” Dan asked.

“We’re already here,” Justin said. “There’s a bed and everything.” Socks off, he pulled off his shirt, then reached for his fly.

“You’re going to be naked, aren’t you?” Dan asked.

“Yeah,” Justin said, and proved it.

“I’ll lock the door,” Dan said.

Justin laughed while Dan stood, getting under the covers. “Prude.”

“Call me whatever you want, but I’m the one who’s going to have to steal and break Erik’s camera,” Dan said, locking the door.

“I sense a story,” Justin said, as Dan slid in beside him.

“I only did what was necessary,” Dan said. “He said that he wasn’t going to sell the pictures on eBay, but we didn’t believe him.”

“Pictures of what?” Justin asked, rolling onto his side.

Dan settled in from behind, molding against his body comfortably, arms wrapping around him firmly. “You don’t need to know.”

The lamp was still on, glowing softly over Justin’s shoulder. “Pictures of you?” He grinned. “Naked?”

“They involved me, Ashley, and a water hose,” Dan said. “We weren’t wearing a lot of clothes at the time.”

Justin laughed. “Sounds scandalous.”

“Try not to speculate.”

“Too late.”

“Oh, Joey’s here,” Dan said.

“Really?” Justin asked. “Now?”

“Yeah.” Dan’s embrace tightened incrementally. “Did anyone say anything to you about what happened with Ashley today?”

“No,” Justin said, mildly curious. “What happened?”

“You know that Joey, JC, and Lance took Ashley and Erik-Michael to dinner last night.”

“Yeah, I heard,” Justin said.

“Apparently, some people interpreted that as Joey taking Ashley on a date, and not everyone’s happy about that, since Joey’s supposed to be dating Nick.”

“They’re boyfriends,” Justin said.

“AJ came over here today to confront Ashley about it.”

Justin sat up, turning to face Dan. “Really? AJ - - did he hurt him?” Stupid question. “How bad was it?”

“Not bad at all,” Dan said. “It might have had the opposite effect of what AJ intended, because last time I saw Ashley, he was definitely standing up for himself.”

“AJ has a strange effect on people,” Justin said. He hoped that AJ had broken Ashley’s nose or something. JC would love it. “AJ’s so passionate about the people he loves. Has he fought everybody who lives here?”

“Everybody except Erik,” Dan said.

Lying down again, rolling onto his side, Justin said, “I guess he’s next.”

“Not if I can help it,” Dan said, arms surrounding him again.

Erik wakened alone in JC’s bed. He got up and visited the bathroom, then debated whether he wanted to go back to bed. It was early, but JC was up and roaming around somewhere.

He put on his underwear and went to the kitchen. No JC. He walked through the house, wondering where JC had disappeared to. “JC?” The door to the guest room was closed; he opened it slowly.

JC was asleep on the bed, on top of the covers. His cell phone was beside him, and he was curled onto one side, but Erik saw streaks of cum across his stomach.

Crouching beside the bed, Erik gently slid his fingers through JC’s hair. “Hey. JC,” he said softly. “JC.”

JC wakened, eyes fluttering open on a warm smile that rapidly became a disgusted frown that became a look of uncertain confusion.

“Hi,” Erik said.

“Honey,” JC said, expression clearing.

“What were you doing in here, calling sex hotlines?” Erik asked.

Erik withdrew his hand as JC sat up, rubbing his eyes. “I called Howie. I didn’t get an answer, but I started thinking about him, about times we had together, and I guess I fell asleep.”

JC seemed to have glossed right over the fact that he’d been masturbating, but Erik got the point. “He was probably asleep.”

“Yeah.” JC dropped onto his back with a sigh.

“You said you were going to go see him today,” Erik reminded him. It was really hard not to touch JC. He was naked. On a bed. Naked. Gorgeous and naked. His stomach had all of those perfect little six-pack ridges that Erik had given up on ever attaining, and his-

“I don’t know what to do,” JC said. He was gazing at a random point across the room in confused despair. “I don’t know what I want. I don’t know who to believe in, or how much trust should matter, and I don’t know who to talk to about it. Everybody has a different agenda.”

“You can talk to me,” Erik said. He got on the bed, crawling across JC and sitting on his other side. “You can tell me anything.”

JC twisted in a very intriguing way until he was on his back and his head was in Erik’s lap. “Tell me the truth about something.”

“Okay.” Erik rested his hands on JC’s shoulders, thumbs stroking gently across smooth skin.

“If we weren’t having sex, if we weren’t involved at all, would we still be friends?”

“Absolutely.” Even if he couldn’t ever touch JC, he’d still be this damned captivated. He’d probably be sort of obsessed. And he’d one hundred percent want to be involved in JC’s life, somehow.

“If you met me and you met Howie, and we weren’t together, if we were even with other people, would you still think we’d be good together?”

He thought about it, slowly caressing JC’s neck. If the idea of JC and Howie as a couple weren’t right in front of him, would it occur to him? “You seem so right for each other. I think that if I knew both of you, separately, I’d figure out that you should be together, and then I’d have to make sure you got together.”

JC’s hand smoothed across the comforter. “Do you honestly trust Howie?”

Erik gave the question consideration. “Yes. I trust him. I guess when you’re in a serious relationship with him, you’d need a whole other level of trust. But I trust him. And I think that you should, too.”

“I don’t know if you can ever really know somebody,” JC said. “It seems like even when you think you understand someone, he can still have all of these secrets and all of these aspects you never guessed were there.”

“I’ll bet Justin has a secret or two, but you know him, don’t you?” Erik asked. “You know Lance and Joey and Chris.”

“Yeah.” From the tone of JC’s voice, Erik had made a good point. “Even if I don’t know everything about every moment of their lives, I still know them, I understand them.” He frowned. “But that isn’t the same.”

“How can you think you don’t know Howie?” Erik asked.

“I don’t know.” JC rubbed his face, frustrated. “Maybe I’m over-thinking everything. I’m making this harder than it has to be. I’ll go over to see him, we’ll talk, maybe we’ll work something out, maybe we won’t. It’s not that serious, it’s not that difficult.”

“You want breakfast?” Erik asked.

“I want a shower,” JC said. He sat up, turning to face Erik, placing a hand on Erik’s thigh. “Howie and I might not figure out everything today. I don’t want you to get your hopes up.”

“It’ll happen,” Erik said. “If it’s not today, it’ll be tomorrow.” He smiled, touching JC’s jaw. “I think once you’re face-to-face, you won’t be able to resist each other.”

“You know, sometimes, the person who seems absolutely right for you just…isn’t,” JC said. “And sometimes, the person you weren’t even looking for is everything you ever needed.”

“Yeah, well,” Erik kissed JC, slowly, and god, it felt as fantastic as it always did. “I’ve learned that the most unexpected people can have the most to offer.”

Brian caressed his sleeping pet. Sweet, precious pet. “Chris pet,” he whispered, stroking Chris’s back. Chris twitched but didn’t waken. Brian smiled, his caresses wandering across the small of Chris’s back and lower. Chris was very nicely groomed, eyebrows and goatee neat. The hair around his dick had been trimmed into a sexy little triangle that pleased Brian aesthetically but wasn’t Chris-like at all, so Brian was against it as a permanent decision.

All of the stray hair around Chris’s asshole had been removed, so now that sweet, precious little pucker looked prettier than ever. Gently spreading the halves of Chris’s ass, Brian exposed it to his tongue, licking softly over it. When he and Chris had first fallen in love, Chris had refused to let Brian do this to him. It had taken Chris a while to understand and accept the fact that there wasn’t one single inch of himself, inside or out, that Brian wasn’t in love with and therefore needed to explore thoroughly. Now, of course, Chris liked anything that Brian did to him.

Chris shifted. “Brian?”

His pet was awake. Brian firmed his tongue, pushing in. Chris moaned in startled pleasure, and Brian moaned with him, spreading his thighs apart further to get closer. Chris drew his knees up under himself, offering Brian better access, and Brian licked harder in approval.

Sometimes pushing in for a soft little fuck, something fluttering his tongue delicately, always making Chris moan his name, Brian reached one hand under, stroking his fingers up the lengthening shaft of Chris’s erection. Chris’s hand met him there, and Brian caressed Chris’s fingers, stroking Chris’s palm. “Your sweet little asshole is so pretty,” Brian murmured, loving it with his tongue.

Chris laughed mid-moan. “You think it’s pretty?”

Brian smiled, releasing Chris’s hand and rubbing the tender pucker with two fingertips. “You don’t think mine’s pretty?”

“It’s beautiful,” Chris said, absolutely meaning it.

Brian kissed it one more time and pushed Chris over, climbing onto him. “I love you,” Brian said, and licked Chris’s right nipple. “That doesn’t mean that I love the way you laugh or that I love the way you kiss me.” He kissed Chris’s left nipple. “That means that I love everything about you. Every detail of you, all of you. You’re Chris, and I love you, the complete package of you.” He kissed his way down to Chris’s navel, making Chris breathe harder, then swirled his tongue around the head of Chris’s erection, making Chris groan. “I’ll always love you.” He looked up Chris’s body, meeting desperately loving eyes. “Will you always love me?”

Jacob was in the house.

Trevor was in the house.

Justin had to get out. “Let’s go.”

“I can’t go far,” Dan said, fixing his hair. “We have practice.”

Shit.

“Joey’s up,” Dan said, as Ashley let out a particularly loud cry of Joey’s name. “He probably won’t want to stick around for rehearsal. You guys can go somewhere.”

True. Okay. Good. Justin relaxed.

“Do you want to come down and get breakfast?” Dan asked. “If anyone else is down there, we can bring the food up here.”

In the light of day, Justin had been given a chance to see exactly what AJ had done to Dan. If Dan was going through that for him, he could walk downstairs for Dan. “Okay.”

On his side, in Lance’s arms, Howie gazed at Lance’s sleeping face. Gently, he stroked Lance’s cheek until green eyes opened. “Good morning,” he said, softly.

Green eyes closing again, Lance kissed him. “Good morning,” Lance murmured, voice low, arms tightening around him. Another kiss.

Howie ran his fingers over Lance’s stubble. “Your voice is so erotic.”

“Really,” Lance said in a soft rumble, kissing his cheek, nibbling on his earlobe. “Is there anything special you’d like me to say?”

Howie shivered, eyes closing. “Everything sounds good coming from you.”

“Howie,” Lance said softly, deep and sexy, and kissed his ear. “Howie, I want to fuck you. I want to fuck your hot, needy ass with my hot, big dick, I want to fill you up with it, I want to fuck you until you come and then keep. On. Fucking.”

Moaning quietly, Howie rolled onto his back, bringing Lance with him.

Lance kissed Howie’s other ear, deftly spreading Howie’s legs with one thigh, keeping his voice a sexual bass. “I’m going to fuck you until your body can’t take it anymore and you’re still calling my name hours later. I’m going to fuck you so hard you’ll still be coming from it next week. I’m going to fuck you so damned well just the sound of my name will make you bend over and moan.”

Howie groaned, a hungry and aching sound. Kissing Lance greedily, he bucked at the feel of Lance’s fingers, arching against the penetration. “Lance,” he moaned, as Lance stroked deep.

“God, I want to be inside you,” Lance said, kissing him.

“Do it, do it now,” Howie moaned, convulsing around Lance’s fingers. “God, don’t wait.”

When Joey went downstairs with Ashley, he was surprised to find Justin with Dan in the kitchen. “Hey,” he said. “I didn’t know you were here.”

“I heard you were here,” Justin said. “Joey oh Joey oh fuck me harder.”

“Don’t mind him at all,” Joey said to Ashley, wrapping an arm around him. “He’s just jealous.”

“Yeah, that’s me,” Justin said.

“I need soundproof walls,” Ashley said.

“Or your own place,” Joey said.

“And leave all of this?” Ashley asked.

“Don’t leave us, Ashley,” Dan said. “We’d be lost without you. The rest of us aren’t nearly as easy to look at.”

“Or nearly as loud,” Justin said.

“You’ve never yelled during sex?” Joey asked, letting Ashley go so he could get food.

Justin turned red. “Shut up.”

“Hey, hey, guys.” Erik burst into the kitchen. “Where’s Trevor? What happened?”

“Welcome home,” Dan said.

“Trevor’s upstairs,” Ashley said. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about his car,” Erik said. “Have you seen his car?”

Dan frowned, giving Erik his full attention. “What’s wrong with his car?”

“What isn’t?” Erik asked. “Somebody keyed the fuck out of it. Keyed ‘fuck’ onto it, too. The inside’s totally jacked up, the backseat was ripped up-”

“What the hell?” Dan asked, on the move.

“He didn’t say anything about it,” Ashley said, as they all went to the front door. “Did it happen this morning?”

“He left it in the driveway, but all of the other cars are fine,” Erik said.

As they all stepped outside, the damage was obvious. Long, deep grooves marred the paint, along with shorter, angry scratches and a few choice words. The glass on the back passenger window had been badly scratched. Stepping closer, Dan opened the doors, and Joey could see that the upholstery had been slashed, the backseat’s innards spilling forth.

“The front seat is fine,” Dan said.

“The worst scratches are on the back and the passenger side,” Ashley said, studying the paint.

“Why didn’t they get the other cars?” Erik asked.

“Maybe it didn’t happen here,” Dan said.

“Where was he last night?” Erik asked.

“He just told me he was at Kevin’s house,” Ashley said.

After making sure that everyone else’s attention was on the car, Joey looked at Justin.

Justin shrugged, unrepentant.

Joey stared at him.

“This looks like shit,” Erik said.

“Is it legal to drive a car that’s cursing?” Ashley asked.

“I don’t want to be the one to tell him about this,” Erik said.

“I’ll do it,” Dan said, sighing.

“Who would attack his car while it was in Kevin’s driveway?” Ashley asked.

“Weird fans,” Erik guessed.

“If it happened last night, and it was dark enough, he might not have noticed it,” Ashley said.

“Most of it’s focused away from directly around the driver,” Dan agreed.

“He could have gotten in and driven home and not noticed anything,” Erik said. “Especially if he was all woozy over Kevin.”

“Can you put it in the garage?” Dan asked. “I’d better go tell him.”

While Dan went into the house, Ashley went to get keys, and Erik inspected the interior, Joey stepped closer to Justin. “We have to talk.”

Justin was looking over Joey’s shoulder at the car. “They’re going to rehearse. We can go to my place. You can call the other guys if you want.”

“I think I need to,” Joey said.

Justin shrugged, not concerned. “They’ll be on my side. Chris would’ve already done it if he could. JC and Lance will understand.”

“JC and Lance would never-”

Justin’s voice was barely audible to Joey, so that no one else would overhear as Ashley came back outside. “You think JC wouldn’t understand? Does Ashley yell for Nick like he yells for you?”

“You can’t-”

Justin met Joey’s eyes, and Joey wished that he hadn’t. “He’s lucky I didn’t torch it.”

Lance didn’t want to leave. He really, really, truly didn’t want to leave. It had been a long time since Howie had been this open to him, this uninhibited, without manipulation or guile or mystery. He stalled at the front door, and Howie submitted to slow, deep kisses, fingers slipping just under the hem of his shirt to caress his back.

“I love you,” he whispered, finally letting himself say it. He’d held back from using the words, because everything had been going so well, he hadn’t wanted to hear Howie’s response and hit reality again.

Howie kissed him, then gazed into his eyes, stroking his lower lip with gentle fingers. “Call me.”

Lance closed his eyes. Yes, reality hurt. A lot.

Howie kissed him again, then whispered his name. “Lance.”

He opened his eyes, unable to resist.

“I’m glad that you came over last night.” There was meaning in Howie’s eyes. “I’m glad that we got to share…what we shared.”

Lance kept his mouth shut, and nodded, and managed to smile. He’d take what Howie offered with as much grace as he could, and escape with what dignity he had left.

Driving behind Justin, Joey called Chris, leaving a message. He couldn’t believe that Justin had keyed Trevor’s car.

Well, maybe he could believe it.

What he couldn’t believe was how cavalier Justin was acting about it. Like it was no big deal. Like it was a normal human response. Normal people didn’t react that way. Normal people-

Normal people didn’t go through what Justin had been through. Normal people weren’t chained to toilets in foreign countries. Maybe Justin’s reactions were different from the norm.

Justin had always been special, very special. In good ways. Now Justin was different in other ways. Ways Joey didn’t like. So were Chris, and JC, and Lance.

He was, too.

But that didn’t make everything they did okay. That didn’t make destroying private property okay. That didn’t-

-didn’t make destroying other people’s lives okay.

Frustrated with his own damned thoughts, Joey pounded his steering wheel with his fist, setting off the horn. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it. He wasn’t going to doubt. He wasn’t going to second-guess. It was way too late for any of that.

His cell phone rang. Justin was calling. Joey made himself stop glaring. “You got Joey.”

“You okay back there?” Justin asked from the car ahead of him. “What are you beeping at?”

Joey sighed. “Myself.”

Trevor crawled across the backseat, trying to put the upholstery back together. “It’s okay. It’ll be okay. It’s not that bad.”

“Your car is trashed,” Erik said. “They did everything but spray paint it.”

“I wonder why they didn’t slash the tires,” Jacob said.

“It looks like they didn’t want him to notice that anything was wrong, at first,” Ashley said.

“I’m sorry,” Dan said to Trevor. “We can take it to the shop, you can get it all fixed up like brand-new.”

“You can get some new rims or something, to make it better than before,” Erik suggested.

“My baby,” Trevor said, flopping onto his back, petting the exposed springs. “My poor baby.”

“He’s not going to start crying, is he?” Jacob asked.

“Do you think this was personal?” Ashley asked.

“It seems so random, it has to be personal,” Erik said. “But if his car was in Kevin’s driveway, do you think this was intended for Kevin?”

“Who’d go after Kevin?” Trevor asked from inside the car.

“Who’d go after Trevor?” Dan asked.

“Maybe it was a crazy, obsessed Backstreet fan,” Trevor said. “Maybe Kevin has a stalker.”

“If you were going after Trevor, wouldn’t you do it while he was at home, and not out somewhere?” Jacob asked. “That’s a lot of work, following him around, when you could just do it here.”

“Nobody’s after me,” Trevor said. “It says ‘Fuck you,’ not ‘Fuck you, Trevor Penick.’”

“So it was random and pointless,” Ashley said.

“And tragic,” Trevor said, getting out and stroking the paint. “God, my poor baby. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’ll get you fresh paint, brand new rims, anything you want.”

“Maybe you should call Kevin,” Erik said. “If it happened at his house, they might have done something else while they were there.”

Trevor turned, eyeing Erik nervously. “Call Kevin?”

Lance checked his messages. He had a call from Joey, telling him to go over to Justin’s house.

On the drive over, he thought about Howie. About last night.

He hadn’t expected the intense pleasure. Even more, he hadn’t expected Howie’s passionate response. Howie had seemed caught up in the moment, swept up in their lovemaking, almost in love with him. It had seemed like old times, the way they’d moved together, the way Howie had touched him, the way Howie had sounded.

Maybe Howie had discovered unexpected ecstasy with him, the way he had with Howie. Maybe Howie had been as suddenly aroused and overwhelmed as he had.

Howie didn’t love him, but maybe Howie loved fucking him.

Or was Howie always like that, while topping? Maybe Howie was the same way with JC.

Or had Howie reacted that strongly to him because Howie wasn’t used to finding that kind of pleasure, because JC just wasn’t that good?

What had Howie’s parting words meant? “I’m glad that we got to share…what we shared.” What the hell did that mean? I’m glad that we got to share what we shared? I’m glad that we could share something unique and special and loving again? I’m glad that I finally got to fuck you, because I hate bottoming?

If Howie liked topping so much, why had he immediately asked Lance to fuck him, both last night and again in the morning? Why bother? To keep up the charade? To confuse him? Or because it was honestly something that Howie wanted?

Howie had definitely seemed to want it. God, Howie was becoming insatiable. It seemed to be getting worse. Not that Lance didn’t love it. But what did it mean?

Howie wanted him. Whatever the position, Howie responded to him, completely.

Did Howie respond to JC the same way?

Did Howie touch JC that way? Did those touches, those moans, mean anything? Lance knew Howie, and-

Or did he? If Howie could whisper “I love you” and not mean it, couldn’t Howie moan “Oh, Lance, yes” and not mean it?

What was he supposed to do? Take last night as a gift and not examine it too closely? Yes, probably. That would be the smartest thing to do. But he couldn’t stand not knowing what Howie really thought about him. Why would Howie bother to respond to him, bother to lead him on? What did Howie get out of it?

Parking in Justin’s driveway, Lance got out and rang the doorbell.

Joey opened the door. “You’ll never guess what Justin did.”

“What happened?” Lance asked. “Is he okay?”

“I’m fine,” Justin said.

“What’d you do?” Lance asked. “Are Chris and JC here?”

“We left messages,” Joey said. “They’ll probably show up later.”

At least Lance could be sure that JC wasn’t with Howie.

JC rang Howie’s doorbell. When the door opened, he smiled. “Can I come in?”

“Of course.” Howie stepped back, allowing him entrance, then closed the door once he was inside. Howie didn’t exactly smile, but JC didn’t blame him for it. “Do you want to sit down?”

“Yeah.” JC followed Howie into the living room, taking a seat. “I’ve been thinking a lot about our situation.”

Howie nodded, his expression cautious. “So have I.”

“Lance and Nick and Erik have given us a lot of complications,” JC said. “Lance is a big part of both of our lives, and so is Nick, and…” He didn’t want to get into that again. “But when I take everyone else out of the equation, and it’s just you and me…”

Howie shifted to face him more completely, watching him.

“Early on, we had a lot of trouble sorting out how this relationship was going to work,” JC said. “But then it seemed like we figured things out, and…”

“I thought we had something pretty good,” Howie said.

“We did,” JC said. “We got along great. Everything was…” He didn’t want to admit it. “It was kind of magical. That’s why I didn’t want to trust it.”

Howie shifted forward, eyes searching his face. “What are you saying?”

He wasn’t exactly sure. Words were coming out of his mouth, thoughts he hadn’t planned on voicing, ideas he hadn’t previously fully formed. He started over from firmer ground. “I’m sorry for pushing you about Lance. I shouldn’t have done that. It wasn’t fair. It won’t happen again.”

“I have to keep in mind the position you’re in,” Howie said.

“It’s just that, after Nick, I don’t know who I can trust,” JC said. “I thought that maybe you were…” Now that JC was halfway through the sentence, he didn’t want to finish it.

“You think I’m out to get you?” Howie asked, looking halfway insulted and halfway like he wanted to laugh.

“Yes,” JC admitted. “No, not now, I don’t - - but I did, I don’t know, I wasn’t sure. Sometimes it’s hard to know what to think.”

Howie nodded, looking thoughtful, his gaze dropping. “That’s fair. After before, after what happened with Nick, and you know my past with Lance. I can see why you’d wonder.”

“You know what happened between me and Nick,” JC said. “You know everything that Nick’s told you, and you have all of his perspectives. I know what happened between you and Lance. Most of what I know about you, is based on information that I got from him. But this is our chance to get to know each other personally, for ourselves. You don’t question me about my past with Nick, you don’t try to match up his version of events with mine, and I appreciate you respecting my privacy. I have to learn to respect your privacy and Lance’s, and it’s not my place to dig around for more information through you. Your relationship with Lance is between the two of you. You were right to keep it that way, and I won’t ask about it again. The only relationship of yours that is my business, is your relationship with me. We’ve put together a strong partnership,” he admitted. “It happened while I wasn’t looking. One day I looked up and everything between us was so good that it scared me. I didn’t trust it.”

“It surprised me, too,” Howie said. His hand came forward, like he wanted to touch JC, but he settled for placing it on the cushion between them instead. “I didn’t expect anything like that to happen between us. How close we are, how well we work together, how much we understand each other.”

As long as Howie seemed to be on the same page, JC could take the next step. “We work together much better when we’re together,” he said. “It’s not hard for me to handle Erik on my own, but I’d much rather have you there with me.”

Hope flashed across Howie’s face, a quick burst of happiness, but then his eyes were cautious and his voice was hesitant. “Are you sure?” Howie asked. “I don’t want-”

“I’m sure,” JC said. “I want us to be full partners again.” He wasn’t sure how to phrase it. “The way we were before.”

Howie smiled. “I’d like that. I’d like to give it another try.”

JC returned Howie’s smile. They spent a minute in silence. JC felt himself relax. With Nick, Erik, his own friends, everywhere he turned was a source of pain, of stress, of worry. He needed someone in his life to be a source of support. He needed Howie as a friend and as a partner, every day more than the last. He couldn’t afford to stay in combat with Howie. Smoothing things over with Howie was a form of self-preservation.

He frowned, remembering. “What about Erik and our break-up?”

“Erik.” JC scratched his jaw, thinking about it. “Maybe we should make it look like we’re still apart, to give him a chance to really bring us together himself.”

“He’s devoted to the idea,” Howie said. “He won’t stop pushing.”

“I know. I told him that I was coming here today, so we’ll have to pretend that we just couldn’t work it out,” JC said. “I’m amazed that he hasn’t figured us out yet. He’s more perceptive than I realized.”

“He pays a lot of attention,” Howie said. “Maybe not to everything, but to the two of us.”

“He really seems to know a lot about you,” JC said. “And a lot about me.”

“I wonder if he realizes that he’s in love with you,” Howie said.

“In love with me?” JC repeated, surprised. “He’s not in love with me.” He frowned, then grinned. “Is he?”

“Don’t be so cocky,” Howie said. “He’s in love with me, too.”

JC laughed. He could be happy with Howie. He felt comfortable with Howie.

“How’s he been?” Howie asked.

“Things have been good,” JC admitted. “We talk about you a lot.”

“We talk about you a lot, too,” Howie said. “How’s the sex?”

JC rubbed his temple, unable to avoid blushing. “Good.”

Howie smiled, leaning closer. “Good?”

“He’s very good with his,” god, “fingers.” JC quickly turned the conversation. “How’s the sex been for you?”

“We’re creating some interesting sexual tension,” Howie said. “He loves fucking you so much, he’s dying to fuck me. And I miss fucking you so much, I’d settle for doing him, just to scratch the itch. So we’re both very aware of where our hands go.”

Since Howie had said it first… “I’ve missed you, too,” JC said. He might as well admit it. “A lot.”

“I knew that I would,” Howie said. “I just didn’t realize how much.”

“It makes sense,” JC said. “We’ve spent so much time together, we’re used to being right there beside each other.”

“Sometimes it’s hard to sleep without you,” Howie said. “Erik doesn’t make a great substitute.” Howie’s hand came forward, sliding over JC’s knee. “I don’t think that anyone could be a substitute for you.”

JC covered Howie’s hand with his own. “We won’t be able to go back to the way things were until Erik puts us back together.” He stroked Howie’s fingers. “We’ll have to stay apart for a while longer.”

Howie made a face. “Is there any way to speed things up?”

“We can spend time together when Erik’s not around,” JC said. His caress strayed up Howie’s forearm. “He doesn’t have to know.” His phone rang. “Shit. Hold on.” Reluctantly lifting his hand, JC got his phone. “This is JC.”

“We need you over at Justin’s house,” Lance said. “He found Trevor’s car in Kevin’s driveway last night, so he trashed it.”

“Shit. I’ll be right there.” JC hung up. “I have to go.”

“All right. Call me later so we can get our stories straight on our fight, for Erik.”

“Okay.” JC rose, Howie standing with him. “Bye.”

Howie hugged him; JC closed his eyes, hugging back. Howie’s embrace was firm, and JC’s body grew warm at the familiar press of Howie’s chest to his, at the familiar scent of, “God, I missed you.”

Howie’s arms tightened. “I missed you more.”

“Maybe if we suddenly realize the error of our ways and cooperate, Erik will be able to reunite us sooner,” JC said.

“At least you’re still getting laid,” Howie said. “I’m dying over here. He gives good head, but that’s just not enough.”

JC pulled back with a smile. “Maybe we’ll find a few free hours to take care of that.”

“Not soon enough.” They walked together to the door. “Call me,” Howie reminded him.

“I will.” JC kissed him, somewhat automatically, but immediately went back for more, deepening the kiss, sliding his fingers through Howie’s hair, moaning at the stroking of Howie’s hands over his chest. Mmm, yes, “Howie…

“JC,” Howie breathed, thumbing his nipple, making him moan again.

God… “I have to go.” He was getting too hard, and Howie was already hard, and maybe, if they were fast…

“Go,” Howie panted, pushing him back. “I don’t want it to be like this. I want to take my time with you.”

JC licked his lips, catching his breath. “Keep Erik with you tonight. I had him last night.”

“That won’t exactly make up for not having you,” Howie said.

JC smiled. “Nothing could.”

Kevin and AJ were enjoying a late breakfast on the back patio when Kevin’s phone rang. Kevin wiped his fingers on a napkin. “Hello.”

“Kevin, it’s Trevor.”

Kevin smiled, softening his tone. “Good morning. What can I do for you?”

“I’ve had sort of a, my car was trashed. It was keyed and the backseat was shredded. It might have happened at your place last night, so I just wanted to check with you. Is everything okay over there?”

Justin. “I didn’t notice anything, but I’ll be sure to take a look around. Are you all right?” Kevin asked.

“I’m fine,” Trevor said. “I’m freaked about my car, but I can’t do anything about that.”

“I’ll pay for everything,” Kevin said. AJ raised his eyes.

“What?” Trevor asked. “No, no, I can take care of it. It’s my car. It just needs new paint, a new backseat-”

“It happened while you were here at my house,” Kevin said. “Tell me where you’re taking it, and I’ll take care of everything.”

“No, I can’t let you do that,” Trevor said. “Seriously, it’s okay. I just wanted to make sure everything was okay over there.”

“I’ll take a good look around,” Kevin said. “Thanks for calling.”

“No problem,” Trevor said. “Bye.”

“Bye.” Kevin hung up. “Justin tore up Trevor’s car,” he told AJ, dialing.

“Motherfucker,” AJ said. “When?”

The phone rang. “While it was here last night.”

“Shit. He didn’t say anything.”

“You don’t keep a close enough eye on him,” Kevin said, as the phone rang again.

Brian answered. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Kevin said. “Trevor’s car is in the shop. Find out which one. We’ll talk later.”

“Will do,” Brian said.

“Thanks,” Kevin said. “Bye.” He hung up. “That little cunt.”

Humming to himself the song Brian had sung in the shower, Chris dialed as he approached Justin’s front door.

“Hello,” Kevin said.

“Minion here,” Chris said. “How was last night?”

“Trevor took a very long time, but eventually he wised up and said no.”

“How far did he get?” Chris asked, curious.

“We didn’t take anything off,” Kevin said. “We didn’t leave the sofa. How many details do you want?”

“That’s enough.” Chris idly watched a fly buzz around Justin’s doorbell. “Anything else I need to know?”

“His car was trashed while it was in my driveway. Do you know anything about that?”

Chris stared at Justin’s front door. Oh. “No, nothing, not a thing, sir.” He hesitated. “Do you want me to find out more about it?”

“No,” Kevin said. “I can draw my own conclusions.”

Chris winced. “I’m sure that you can.”

“When Trevor calls in the next few days, talk to him.”

“What if he doesn’t call?” Chris asked.

“He will.”

Kevin seemed sure of that, so Chris accepted it as truth. “Okay. Anything else?”

“That’s all for now.”

“Thank you and good-bye.”

“Good-bye, Chris.”

Chris tucked his phone away and rang the doorbell.

Lance opened the door. “Come on in.”

“So,” Chris said, entering the house. “What’s the big emergency?”

“Chris!” Justin accosted him, dragging him further into the house and over to the sofa.

“Are you stronger today?” Chris asked, as Justin pushed him down.

“What were Trevor and Kevin doing?” Justin asked without preliminary, staring at Chris like he held the key to Justin’s future. “Last night, Trevor was in Kevin’s house.”

“They were…having a nice visit,” Chris said. “Help me,” he said to Joey.

“What kind of visit?” Justin asked. “What happened?”

“He might not even know,” Lance said. The doorbell rang. “I’ll get it.”

“It wasn’t, it was, um,” Chris had no way to break the news gently. “Don’t shoot the messenger.”

“What happened?!” Justin demanded.

“Hey.” JC came in. “Justin, what happened?”

“That’s what Justin wants to know,” Chris said.

“Everybody sit down,” Joey said, pushing Justin aside and sitting between him and Chris on the sofa. “We’re going to discuss this like calm, rational people.”

“Who is?” Chris asked. “Us?”

“You trashed Trevor’s car?” JC asked Justin. “Are you okay?”

“It was in Kevin’s driveway,” Justin said. “They were in the house,” he told JC. “What were they doing?” he asked Chris.

“Kissing,” Chris said, and ducked.

Nothing happened.

Chris peeked.

Justin was staring over Chris’s head at nothing. His mouth was open; his eyebrows kept contracting. He looked like he didn’t know whether to scream or cry. As his face grew red, his chest began to heave.

“Justin, it’s okay,” JC said, coming over to sit closer, on the coffee table, putting his hand on Justin’s knee. “It doesn’t mean anything. Kevin doesn’t care about Trevor, he’d never give Trevor a second thought. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“They were just kissing?” Joey asked Chris, to make sure.

“Just kissing,” Chris said, slowly straightening, since it seemed like Justin wasn’t going to attack.

Justin made a few odd ticking noises, curving in on himself a little.

“Justin, we can guarantee you, Trevor doesn’t mean anything to Kevin,” Lance said.

“I don’t even think that Kevin cares enough to hate Trevor,” Chris said. “At least Kevin feels something for you. Kevin’s feelings for you are pretty damned intense. He doesn’t give a shit about Trevor.”

“The motherfucker got to kiss Kevin,” Justin whispered. “I can’t kiss Kevin.” His eyes darted. “The motherfucker got to touch Kevin. I can’t touch Kevin.”

“It doesn’t mean anything,” JC said. “No matter what happens, it’s all meaningless.”

“The motherfucker got to talk to Kevin,” Justin said, glaring at nothing with utter hatred. “I can’t talk to Kevin. The motherfucker was invited into Kevin’s house. I can’t go into Kevin’s house.”

“Well, you can when you break in,” Chris said.

“Don’t encourage that right now,” Joey said.

Chris shrugged.

Justin was on his feet, walking. “The motherfucker got to be with Kevin. I can’t be with Kevin.”

“This is all going to end very badly for Trevor,” Lance said. “I’m guessing that Kevin’s not going to let him off easy.”

“The motherfucker was with Kevin,” Justin said, kicking the coffee table. JC jumped at the unexpected impact.

“Is this officially Trevor’s new name?” Chris asked.

“If you’re not going to be helpful, could you be quiet?” Joey asked.

“I don’t see you helping much,” Chris said, to be fair.

“Yeah, but at least I’m being unhelpful quietly,” Joey said.

“The motherfucker was with Kevin! In Kevin’s house! Talking to Kevin!” Justin kicked a footstool halfway across the room. “Touching Kevin!” A rack of coasters hit the opposite wall, coasters raining down to the floor. “Kissing Kevin!”

Privately, Chris was jealous. He was so whipped he couldn’t even stay in touch with his anger at Jacob. He couldn’t give in to violent tendencies; he barely had them. Justin still had access to anger, could act out, was willing to risk Kevin’s wrath. Chris had known that he wouldn’t be able to muster any real anger for the entire length of the game, so he’d stopped trying. Although he wondered if that would change once Brian and Jacob became…closer.

“What’s Kevin going to do to the motherfucker?” Justin asked, pivoting to face Chris. “How badly is Kevin going to destroy the motherfucker?”

Yes, apparently, that really was Trevor’s new name. “Kevin’s only shared a few steps with me at a time,” Chris said. “I only get about a week into the future. But it’s Kevin, so I’m pretty sure some interesting new pain and suffering will be involved.”

Justin walked closer until he was pretty much looming over Chris where Chris sat. “You,” Justin said intensely, glaring directly at him, “have to hurt the motherfucker. You have to make the motherfucker pay.”

Oh. Chris hesitated, but he felt that an honest answer was called for. “You can’t ask me to do that. I’m sure that Kevin will take care of it, I firmly believe that Kevin’s going to make him pay.” Chris forgot exactly what Trevor was supposed to pay for, but maybe it would come up between now and then. “Kevin’s going to take care of it, don’t worry, but you can’t try to make me be more than a pawn for the set-up.” Justin’s glare strengthened, and Justin looked on the verge of speech, so Chris rushed ahead with his best argument. “How would you feel if Joey demanded that you personally ensure Dan’s destruction?”

Momentarily, Justin looked like his processors had frozen. Maybe he was having trouble shifting gears that suddenly. He blinked, and looked at Joey.

“Sorry,” Chris said. “I’d love to help you out, but I can’t promise you that I’ll do anything more than I have to.”

Justin swayed slightly on his feet, then abruptly sat beside Chris. Joey barely shifted aside in time to give Justin room.

“Are you okay?” Lance asked Justin, coming over to sit beside JC.

“What are we going to do?” Justin asked, desperate.

“We have to do the impossible,” JC said. “We have to trust them. I have to trust Nick to destroy Ashley, and you have to trust Kevin to destroy Trevor. If they don’t do it, even more thoroughly and brutally than they destroyed us, then all of this is for nothing.”

“They’ll do it,” Chris said. Brian wouldn’t walk away without having fun first.

“If Justin can’t count on Chris to get Trevor, he can do it himself,” Lance said. “He already is, but-”

“That’s what we have to talk about,” Joey said. “How far are we going to go? How much is too much?”

“The car is still drivable,” Justin said. “I didn’t fuck up anything to make it crash. The motherfucker was perfectly safe.”

“What exactly did you do?” JC asked.

“I keyed it,” Justin said. “A lot. And I ripped apart the backseat. I didn’t break windows. I didn’t dent anything.”

Frankly, Chris thought that Justin had shown remarkable restraint.

“That makes it okay?” Joey asked.

“If we don’t get revenge in our own ways, we’re going to go crazy,” Lance said.

Or, in Chris’s opinion, crazier.

“Revenge for what?” Joey asked. “Are you really that upset that Howie’s doing whatever he’s doing with Erik? I don’t care if AJ ends up kissing Dan. I don’t care if AJ ends up fucking Dan. AJ fucks a lot of people who aren’t me. That doesn’t mean he gives a shit about any of them. So Kevin’s kissing Trevor, so what? He’s only paying Trevor any attention because he plans to fuck Trevor over.”

Justin stared at Joey.

“Um,” Chris said, trying to find something to say before Justin exploded.

“Why are you so worried about Trevor’s car?” Lance asked Joey.

“How many of your cars did AJ destroy?” JC asked.

Apparently they didn’t like Joey making light of the problem, either. Chris approved. Not that he wanted Joey to undergo personal trauma, but it didn’t seem quite fair that Joey wasn’t jealous of Dan.

“There was the one they pulled out of the Pacific,” Lance said.

“The one they pulled out of the Atlantic,” JC said.

Justin was still staring at Joey.

“The one they pulled out of your pool,” Lance said.

“The one that he set on fire,” JC said.

“That-” Joey tried to interrupt.

“The one that he lost,” Lance said.

“You can’t-”

“The one that got stolen,” JC said.

Justin was still staring.

“The one that-”

“Guys!” Joey said, cutting off Lance. “You can’t-”

“Did you see Dan?” Justin asked Joey suddenly.

“Dan?” Joey asked, distracted. “Yeah, I saw him.”

Justin shifted to face Joey, leaning back against Chris’s shoulder. “Did you see his neck?”

“Yeah,” Joey said slowly.

“What’s wrong with Dan’s neck?” JC asked.

“AJ,” Justin said, looking at Joey. “There are really nasty bite marks on Dan’s neck. Suck marks. Long, dark scratches on his thighs. Bruises on his arms. Scratches on his thighs.”

“What’s your point?” Joey asked. “You’re trying to make me jealous? So AJ’s messing with Dan, so what? It sounds like Dan can’t keep up.”

“You’d have to talk to AJ about that,” Justin said. “I’m never there to see it for myself. I wouldn’t want to give you the wrong impression about anything.”

“Is that how AJ has sex?” Lance asked. “By beating people up?”

“AJ likes it rough,” Justin said. “Doesn’t he?” he asked Joey.

Joey looked like he wanted to say, “Fuck you,” but he swallowed it. “Don’t take this out on me,” he said, instead. “It’s not my fault…”

Chris prayed that Joey wouldn’t finish that sentence. That beginning couldn’t lead to a good ending.

“Let’s talk about something else,” JC said.

“Anyone do anything interesting yesterday?” Chris asked.

“Ashley slapped Nick,” Joey said.

“What?!” JC demanded, gripping the leg of Joey’s jeans.

Chris groaned, turning his face against Justin’s shoulder. “Joey, go home.”

“AJ showed up at the Townhouse yesterday,” Joey said. “He confronted Ashley about spending so much time with me. He scared Ashley shitless and roughed him up a little. Ashley came straight over to my house and told Nick that if he had a problem, he should bring it up with Ashley and not send other people to do his dirty work.”

“He hit Nick,” JC said in a careful voice, staring at Joey for confirmation.

“Not hard,” Joey said. “Nick wouldn’t even have blinked, if he hadn’t been so surprised.”

JC was sitting forward, blue eyes ablaze. “That little bitch hit Nick?”

“He’s okay,” Joey said. “It was kind of a shock, because, hell, it’s Ashley. I wasn’t even sure what the problem was when he came storming into my house. Dan seems to think that AJ showing up was all about him.” Joey shrugged, his opinion of Dan having taken a mysterious downward turn in the last few minutes.

“Really,” JC said, sitting back suddenly.

“I thought maybe it was something AJ and Nick set up, but Nick didn’t seem to know anything about it,” Joey said.

“Really,” JC said again, slowly.

“What?” Lance asked JC.

“I don’t know,” JC said. He was studying Joey oddly. “I thought they’d communicate better. The Boys, I mean.”

“Well, Nick said it had probably been to prove something to Dan,” Joey admitted.

“Hmm.” JC’s gaze wandered off somewhere.

Chris slid his arm around Justin, whose back was still resting against his side. “How’re you doing?”

“I have a better body,” Justin said.

Apparently Justin was back on the subject of Trevor again. “You’re much cuter,” Chris said. “You’re far superior.”

“Next time I’m in that house, I’m going to do something to that little bitch,” JC said.

“I have somewhere to be,” Joey said. “Are you all okay here?”

“We’re fine,” Lance said.

Joey put a hand on Justin’s knee. “You’re okay? I’m sorry about… I know you’re upset, and-”

“Yeah. It’s okay,” Justin said. “I know I don’t always make sense to other people.”

“I’m not other people,” Joey said.

Justin sat forward, hugging him. “I’m sorry, too.”

Joey hugged Justin back, then got up. “Call me,” he said to everyone.

“We always do,” Chris said.

Joey left.

“Have fun tracking down AJ,” Chris called after him.

Justin snickered.

Continue on to part forty-four

matthew@matthewtime.com
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