Sucker

Copyright November 24, 2002-April 15, 2005 by Matthew Haldeman-Time

Rating: NC-17 for graphic male-male sex

Pairings: Backstreet Boys/*NSYNC/O-Town

Disclaimer: The young men who comprise the Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, and O-Town are their own people.  The author has not met anyone here described, nor does the author mean to suggest that these people act this way in real life.  This writing is a work of fiction.  I make no money from this venture.

Continued from part twenty-six...

Justin went upstairs under the pretense of looking for something to wear to the club.  Flipping through hangers in his closet, he called AJ.

            “What do you want?” AJ asked in an amused, conversational tone.

            Justin had been feeling a low-grade yet constant horniness lately.  He took it as a good sign, since he was usually too miserable to be turned on, and whenever he was in lust it was solely focused on Kevin.  Recently, he’d just been horny in general, and it was a reassuringly normal feeling.  Since he had AJ on the phone, he said, “I’d like to go dancing later.”

            “Yeah?” AJ asked.  “I’ll take you dancing.”

            Justin grinned.  “That’s actually not why I’m calling.  I just wanted to check in.”

            “What’s our boy up to?” AJ asked.

            Succinctly and in a low voice, Justin brought AJ up to speed, including the bracelet and how tired Dan had seemed the night before.

            In return, AJ told Justin about Dan’s visit.  And Dan’s kiss.

            “Fuck,” Justin whispered, shocked and wide-eyed.  “You’re shitting me.”

            “Felt like he was packing something pretty solid, too,” AJ said.  “If you would’ve told me about that, I might’ve pushed the issue earlier.”

            “I haven’t seen it hard,” Justin said.  He was still stunned.  “He had you up on the wall?”

            “Left a bruise on my jaw,” AJ said.

            Damn.  “Are you the one who left that bruise on his neck?” Justin asked.

            AJ growled softly.  “I hope so.”

            Justin was starting to feel the most disturbingly pleasant shivers in his spine.  He tried to picture Dan and AJ together.  The image increased the shivers to the point that he had to change the subject.  “You’re the one who told him what I’d want.”

            “I know what you need,” AJ said matter-of-factly.

            “What do we do now, wait for him to go back to you?” Justin asked.

            “I don’t like waiting,” AJ said.

            Justin could have guessed that.  “So?”

            “So when are you going out again?”

            “Tonight,” Justin said.

            “Good,” AJ said.

            Chris couldn’t interrupt Brian.  He couldn’t disturb Brian’s time with Jacob.  He’d never do anything to jeopardize Brian’s plans.

            But Brian was in the house.  And Chris wanted to be close.

            He strolled ever so casually over to the pool.  The door to Jacob’s room was shut.  He dipped his toes in the water.

            The door opened.  “Yeah,” Jacob said, leading the way, Brian right behind him.  “We probably caught them early enough.”

            Chris took his foot out of the pool and crossed his arms over his naked chest, trying to look casual.  Trying to look calm.  Trying not to stare too extra obviously hard at Brian.

            “Did you want something?” Jacob asked him.

            “Just going swimming,” Chris said.  They were getting closer.  He was calm.

            “Is Trevor cleaning up the kitchen?” Jacob asked.

            “Hard to say,” Chris said, uncrossing his arms to tug his pants up a little.  “I think that he is, but he thinks that I’m upstairs getting a clean shirt, and here I am.”

            Jacob’s gaze dropped to Chris’s torso; he smiled.  “That rules out my third theory on why he likes you.”

            Chris gasped.  “You scrawny little-”

            “Be nice,” Brian chided, but his eyes were warm.

            Chris shut up.

            “I’m just kidding,” Jacob said.  “I can’t afford to piss off Chris,” he told Brian.  “With everybody the other guys have been bringing around here lately, Chris is the only one I can even talk to.”

            “Thanks,” Chris said.

            “No problem,” Jacob said.  His tone was amused, but his smile was genuine.

            Jacob liked him.  Jacob didn’t like anybody, as far as Chris could tell, but Jacob liked him.

            Chris wondered if that made any difference to Brian.

            “Have fun swimming,” Jacob said, moving past him with Brian.

            “Thanks,” Chris said.  He watched their backs.  “Bye.”

            Dan’s friend Rebecca was not only pretty damned hot, she was a nice girl.  She seemed confident, and she was obviously really into Dan.  She was a good person.  Justin could see why Dan was trying to get more serious with her.

            Justin knew that if he asked Dan to stay with him, Dan would do it.  He held more pull with Dan than she did.

            But that might not last.

            Justin watched Dan dance with her and tried to imagine Dan engaged in a fierce kiss with AJ, locked in a passionate embrace and pushing AJ back against a wall.

            Nobody pushed AJ.

            Lance handed Justin a drink.  “What’s wrong?”

            “You’re a pretty controlling top, right?”

            Lance looked surprised, but he smiled.  “Maybe.  Why?”

            “Do you get rough?”

            Lance considered the question as he took a sip.  “Not usually, no.”

            Justin thought about the places he’d had sex with women.  Then he thought about the places he’d had sex with Kevin and AJ.  “Do you use beds?”

            “Most of the time,” Lance said.  “I take Brian wherever he happens to be when he starts begging for it.”

            Justin wondered if he’d missed a step.  “Brian begs you for it?”

            Lance shrugged, taking another sip.  “Yeah.”

            Justin watched Lance’s mind wander.  “What?”

            “Howie used to beg me for it.”  Lance smiled at nothing.  “Howie used to love me for it.  He used to tell me I delivered it like nobody else could.”

            Justin didn’t doubt that Lance was good.  He’d never seen Lance fuck anyone, but he’d heard it, and it had sounded good.  Sometimes the sound of it had made JC’s eyes glaze over, and JC was a better judge than Justin was, anyway.  And when Lance was flirting with guys, when he’d found his target and was moving in for the kill, there was a certain confidence to Lance that Justin didn’t even see onstage.  There were a few realms where Lance was absolutely in his element, and picking up guys was one of them.

            Lance nodded at something behind Justin.  “Incoming.”

            Justin turned to see Dan moving his way with odd determination.  When they made eye contact Dan smiled; it wasn’t a fake smile, but it had a distracted air.  He was towing Rebecca, and when he reached Justin, he said, “I’m going to go take a leak.  Dance with Rebecca for me so no one else steals her.”

            “You don’t think I’ll steal her?” Justin asked.

            “I trust you,” Dan said.  He said hey to Lance, kissed Rebecca’s cheek, and walked off.

            Justin smiled at Rebecca and asked her if she wanted to dance.

            AJ must have arrived.

            Dan wound his way quickly through the crowd, dodging dancers and ducking waitresses, until he found AJ near the bar.  “Excuse me,” he said, and grabbed AJ’s arm, pulling AJ a few feet away.  AJ cursed at him, protesting his grip, but Dan wasn’t letting go.  He leaned in to be sure AJ couldn’t miss a word, ignoring AJ’s angry protests, and asked in a demanding voice, “What are you doing here?”

            AJ’s forearm twisted until AJ’s grip mimicked his, each of them with a hand just beneath the other’s elbow, fingers digging in without regard for comfort.  “I only have to back off once our deal is made.  You haven’t promised me anything.  I can be wherever the hell I want.”

            Dan couldn’t see AJ’s eyes, because AJ was wearing sunglasses.

            So Dan snatched them off.

            AJ’s other hand flew up, grabbing Dan’s wrist.  The club was so loud that Dan couldn’t hear if AJ was making one of those ridiculous feral noises, but he sure as hell looked like he was snarling.

            Dan released the sunglasses; AJ let go of his wrist to catch them in mid-air, without breaking the lock of their gazes.

            “Don’t you ever do that again,” AJ warned, “or you won’t live to regret it.”

            “Don’t you ever come near Justin again,” Dan said.  “I don’t want to see you within ten miles of anywhere he ever is.”  AJ had a cruel grip on his forearm, and he knew that he was gripping too hard in return, and he didn’t care.

            There was a hardness over the fire in AJ’s eyes.  “Are you going to give me what I want?”

            Dan had already made his decision.  “Yes.”

            Something flared in AJ’s gaze, something dangerous and triumphant and scalding.  “I’ll be calling you soon.”

            “Call my cell phone,” Dan said.  “Don’t you ever call my house.”

            AJ glared.  “Fuck you,” he said.

            It sounded like a promise.

            Chris went upstairs, put on one of Trevor’s shirts, and stretched out on his stomach across Trevor’s bed, picking up the remote control and turning on the stereo.  He was flipping through radio stations when Trevor came in and crawled on top of him, lazily nuzzling his nape and not lazily squeezing his ass.

            “Where is everybody?” Chris asked.

            “Jacob and Brian left, Ashley and Joey are in his room, and Dan’s out with Justin.”

            Chris counted on his fingers while Trevor kissed his shoulder.  He came up one short.  “We’re missing Erik.”

            “I don’t know where he is,” Trevor said, “and I don’t care.”

            “You’re going to have to talk to him sometime,” Chris pointed out.

            “Can we talk about this later?” Trevor asked.

            “So you can molest me?” Chris asked.

            “Yeah,” Trevor said.

            “Well, you’re honest.”  The hands stroking Chris’s waist slowed down.  “What?”

            “Shit,” Trevor said.  “Now I’m worried about Erik.”  He dropped his forehead between Chris’s shoulder blades.  “I don’t want to be worried about Erik.”

            Chris pushed and rolled and twisted until he was on his back and he could see the angry frustrated pain in Trevor’s eyes.  “You’re going to be worried about him whether you want to be or not.”

            “He’s fine, he’s probably shacked up with some girl,” Trevor said.

            “Okay,” Chris said.

            “I don’t get it,” Trevor said.  “I don’t know what the hell happened.  Everything was okay, and then everything got fucked up.  What’s his problem?  Why’d he start messing with me?”

            “Maybe it wasn’t him,” Chris said.  “Maybe he’s pissed off about something.  Maybe he meant it as a joke, but when you got pissed off he got pissed off back and decided to escalate.”

            “I don’t know what the hell’s wrong with him.”  Trevor sat up, no longer in an amorous mood.

            Chris sat up, too, and turned off the stereo.  “You hear that?”

            Trevor frowned at him.  “I don’t hear anything.”

            “And that’s exactly what you have without Erik,” Chris said.  “You need all five of you to be together to have anything.  You have to find a way to get that back.”

            Trevor glanced at the stereo.  “I remember the first time we heard ourselves on the radio.”

            “Got excited?” Chris asked.

            “Are you fucking kidding me?” Trevor asked.  “I thought it was the biggest day of my life.”  He shook his head.  “We thought we were going to take over the world.”

            “Yeah,” Chris said.  “That’s not as much fun to do by yourself.”

            Justin stepped off of the dance floor and walked over to Dan.  “What’s up?”

            “Do you want me to stay tonight?” Dan asked.

            “You stay with me every night,” Justin said, putting his hands in his pockets.  “You deserve one night to yourself.”

            “Are you sure?” Dan asked.  “It’s okay with me either way.”

            “I’m putting a serious crimp in your sex life, and we both know it,” Justin said.  “Go ahead.  I’ll be fine.”

            “Okay,” Dan said.  “Call me if you need anything.”

            Justin looked at him.  “Do you realize that you’re not my mother?”

            “Hey, I’m going,” Dan said.  “See you later.”

            “Yeah,” Justin said.

            “Take care of yourself.”

            “Go,” Justin said.  “Before she gets bored and leaves with someone else.”

            Dan grinned and left.

            Justin ran a restless hand over his hair, watching Dan go.

            Lance stepped up to his side.  “Is he taking her home?”

            “He’s spending the night with her.”  Justin couldn’t do it.  He’d been lying to himself; he couldn’t spend the night alone.  He’d go out of his mind.

            “You okay?” Lance asked.

            “Are you…doing anything or anybody after this?” Justin asked.

            “Why?” Lance asked.  The brief confusion in his eyes cleared.  “Do you want to come home with me?”

            Justin didn’t want Lance to think he was a pussy, but he also didn’t have a lot of options.  He couldn’t risk getting caught with AJ, and he was sure the other guys’ beds were occupied by this hour.  “I’ll be okay,” he forced himself to say.  “I’ll just go home and-”

            “No,” Lance said.  “It’s okay.”  He grinned.  “Just don’t try anything.”

            “Ask Dan,” Justin said.  “I’m the perfect gentleman.”

            “Dan’s the perfect gentleman,” Lance corrected him.  “I don’t know what you are.”

            Justin laughed.  “I guess we’ll find out.”

            JC groaned, coming in quick spasms, as Howie rode his ass, fucking into him in smooth, controlled strokes.  God, it felt so good, JC loved the way Howie, oh yeah, oh god…  Cursing breathlessly, JC gripped the backs of Howie’s thighs more tightly, encouraging Howie deeper.

            Howie kept the rhythm going, his hands holding JC’s hips while he ducked his head to lick JC’s right nipple.  “I’ve wanted this,” he said, “for so long,” he moaned so softly JC ached, “I don’t want to stop.”

            Trevor was asleep.

            Chris, wrapped in Trevor’s embrace, gazed into the darkness over Trevor’s shoulder, his fingers idly drifting over Trevor’s back, and wondered what Brian was doing.

            “What can I do?” Lance asked, getting into bed beside Justin in the lamplight.  “JC told me how bad it was last time you slept at his house.”

            “Yeah.”  Justin decided to give Lance the information he had, and let Lance choose what to do.  “It might help if we leave this lamp on.  And if you spoon me from behind and hold me as tightly as you can.”

            Lance raised his eyebrows.  “Really.”

            Justin picked at the hem of his shorts.  “That sounds as crazy to you as it does to me?”

            Lance nodded.  “Yes.”

            Sighing, Justin slumped back against the headboard.  Maybe he should just go home.  At least then he could freak out in the privacy of his own house and not bother Lance.  He shouldn’t be bothering other people with his bullshit drama, anyway.  He was going to have to learn to sleep on his own at some point.  Without waking himself up screaming or crying or coming.

            “Hey.”  Lance’s hand covered his, and Justin realized that he’d been agitatedly fidgeting with a pillowcase.  “It’s okay.  Whatever works.  Do you know who the last guy in this bed was?”

            “Who?” Justin asked.

            “Jacob,” Lance said.  “Trust me, this is an improvement.”  He slid down, tugging on Justin’s hand.

            Lance’s embrace wasn’t as tight as Dan’s or as burly as Joey’s, but it was comfortingly familiar.  Justin relaxed, closing his eyes.

            “You don’t sleep naked anymore?” Lance asked.

            “I don’t sleep naked with you,” Justin said.

            Lance’s chuckle was disbelieving.  “You sleep naked with Dan?”

            Justin smiled to himself.  “Don’t tell the tabloids.”

            “Do his hands wander?”

            Justin laughed.  “I wish.”  Immediately, his eyes snapped open.  “I didn’t mean that.”

            “Justin…”  Lance’s tone held a warning.

            “I know,” Justin said.  “I know.  Just…don’t.”

            “Be careful,” Lance said.

            Justin closed his eyes again.  His mind drifted, picturing Dan with Rebecca.  Dan with AJ.  Dan, for the hell of it, with Kevin.  “I wonder what Kevin’s doing right now.”

            Lance’s forehead rested against the back of Justin’s neck.  “I know what Howie’s doing right now.”  His tone was dark.  “He’s fucking JC.”

            Justin winced.  “You don’t know that.”

            Lance’s voice twisted.  “And JC’s fucking loving it.”

            Moaning, crying out, JC undulated rhythmically astride Howie’s body.  His dick jerked in Howie’s hand, cum spurting forth in successive shots, while JC groaned and panted, shuddering with release.  Finally, sated, JC draped himself over Howie, threading his fingers through the curls at Howie’s nape and kissing beneath Howie’s jaw.  “You’re amazing,” he murmured, sliding his other hand over the warm muscle of Howie’s chest.

            Howie rolled JC onto his back, taking his mouth in a slow, thorough kiss.  “Stay with me,” Howie whispered, kissing him again, stroking his abs with a lingering touch.

            “Where else would I be?” JC asked, sucking lightly on Howie’s tongue, feeling lazily satisfied, hedonistic, self-indulgent.

            “No,” Howie said, breaking their kiss to look down into JC’s eyes.  “Stay with me.”  He touched JC’s lips with a soft caress.  “After everything’s done, when Erik’s gone, I don’t want all of this to be over.  I don’t want…us…to be over.”  His voice was hushed, intimate.  “Stay with me, JC.”

            JC gazed up at him, one hand cupping the side of his jaw, chest tightening with unexpected emotion.  “Howie…”  He didn’t know what to say.  What about Nick?  What about Lance?

            But what if Nick never wanted JC back?  Could JC really afford to throw aside every passing opportunity for happiness, and wait for Nick forever?

            Howie was different from Nick.  Nothing like Nick at all.  Sometimes being with Nick had been like dealing with an unexpected force of nature.  Sometimes looking at Howie was like looking into a mirror.

            All of those early complications, all of the anger and crossed signals and misunderstandings, were gone.  Things were good between the two of them, very good.  JC hadn’t been in a relationship like this since before Nick.

            Nick was an odd step in JC’s life.  The greatest, strongest love of his life, but nothing he’d ever expected to happen.

            Howie was exactly what he’d always wanted, what he’d been looking for in a partner.  Howie was perfect for him.

            JC wanted to say yes.

            But no matter how he felt about Howie, he loved Lance.

            JC felt regret fill his eyes.  “I’m sorry,” he said, stroking the stubble dusting Howie’s jaw.  “I can’t even think about that, not when I know what it would do to Lance.  You mean so much to me, Howie, and our partnership in this game has given me so much.”  He hated to have to say it.  “But I can’t commit to that partnership extending beyond this game.”

            Howie averted his gaze.  “I understand.”  He scraped together a smile, meeting JC’s eyes.  “Then let’s enjoy what we do have.”  His smile softened, dimmed, as his fingers skimmed JC’s cheek.  “While we still have it.”

            Jacob watched Brian sleep.

            His best friend had betrayed him.  He couldn’t track down Clara.  His house was in chaos.  He rarely saw the guys anymore, and when he did, they weren’t themselves.  Everything was changing; everyone was different.

            Jacob was changing.  Jacob was different.

            He’d been making choices.  For himself, for Brian.  For the sake of their friendship.

            He loved Brian.

He’d do anything for Brian.  The ends justified the means.

            Didn’t they?

            Jacob’s gaze traced the lines of Brian’s face, the sharp edges of cheek and jaw.  The way Brian’s hair curled onto his forehead.  There was an undeniable strength to Brian, but a softness, too.  A gentle warmth.

            What would Brian think if he knew what Jacob was doing with Lance?

            Then again, what right would Brian have to judge?  Brian was doing the same thing.

            Jacob couldn’t predict how Brian would react.  He wasn’t sure how he felt about it, himself.  No matter what he thought the final result of his plan would be, what he was doing was wrong.  It made him feel dirty, disgusting; it made his skin crawl.  Giving Lance head.  Letting Lance fuck him.  He hated Lance, and he was letting Lance use him, opening up for Lance’s scorn.  Just to seduce Brian.

            He didn’t need Lance.  He could take care of it on his own.  He and Brian could figure it out together.

            But everything had to be perfect for Brian.  Jacob couldn’t risk making a mistake.  Couldn’t risk offending Brian or fucking up or, ultimately, losing Brian.

            He needed Lance.  He’d use Lance.  He’d take what he needed and, once he’d gotten what he wanted, he’d never go near Lance again.

            Lance didn’t know how Dan handled it.  Justin had been shaking and twitching all night, panting in terror and moaning in pain.  Finally, frustrated and seeing that neither one of them was going to get even half-decent sleep the way things were going, Lance had rolled Justin over and pinned him down, sleeping right on top of him.

            When he’d done it, it had seemed like a good solution.  And it had worked; Justin had slept soundly after that.  But waking up the next morning provided a brief moment of awkwardness as Lance got off of Justin, both of them averting their eyes.  Still, they’d known each other too well for too long for things to stay awkward for more than a minute, and by the time Justin had dressed and eaten and was ready to leave, they were sharing a warm hug.

            “Thanks,” Justin said.  “Sorry if I kept you awake for a while there.”

            “It’s okay,” Lance said.  “Do you go through that every night?”

            “Not when Dan’s with me,” Justin said honestly, rubbing his hands on his jeans.

            Lance frowned.  “What is it about him?”

            Justin shrugged uneasily, turning the bracelet on his wrist.  “Dan takes care of me.”

            Lance didn’t like that.  “You can take care of yourself.”

            Justin shook his head.  “There’s only one thing standing between me and Kevin.  There’s only one thing keeping me back from the edge.  When I’m coming apart and I know in my heart that I’m going to die if I don’t go to him and I need Kevin so badly I can feel my skin peeling up from my bones, Dan’s the only thing holding me back.”

            As the morning sun seeped into the room, JC stretched lazily against Howie, comfortable under the covers beside Howie’s warmth.  To keep his mind from drifting dangerously back to Nick, he thought forward, to Erik.

            He wanted Erik to fuck him again.  The idea of it made his body tighten with anticipation.  Erik’s hands sliding greedily over his thighs.  The naked, adoring lust in Erik’s eyes.  The eager tremor in Erik’s voice that betrayed how close his control was to slipping.  The thick push of his hard, young dick deep inside JC’s body.

            JC didn’t go for straight guys or younger guys, but Howie had taught him exactly what Erik had to offer.  JC and Howie had been cultivating a need for Erik in each other, spending long hours going over his qualities in detail, making each other shake with desire for him and call out his name.  After spending agonizing nights in L.A. begging for Erik, suddenly being confronted with him in JC’s own home had been more than JC could take.

            The memories of their time together before and the memories of the past weeks when JC had been masturbating to photographs while Howie had whispered in his ears, had blurred with the reality of Erik standing in front of him.  JC had tried to limit himself to conversation, but the way Erik had kissed him, that want, that lust, that insistence…  JC hadn’t been able to resist.  He’d barely stopped himself from offering Erik his ass.

             Erik had wanted him.  Erik had wanted him too much to deny it, too much to be ashamed.  Those lusting hands traveling his body, that lush mouth taking in his cock, the way Erik pushed aside all concerns and complications in favor of fulfilling their mutual need…

            There was still a lot for Erik to learn.  A lot for JC and Howie to teach.  Many ways for JC to turn Erik’s natural sexual enthusiasm to his own pleasure.

            Howie shifted, pushing one muscular leg more snugly between JC’s thighs with a murmur that sounded so much like, “Mmm, Josh,” that JC lifted his head from the pillow.  Had Howie just...?  No one called him that anymore, no one but the oldest of friends.  He’d been Josh lifetimes ago.

            Still, even though unexpected, it had sounded nice.

            JC relaxed, his palm skating Howie’s shoulder.  He and Howie weren’t ever going to have anything after the game ended.  How much harm was there in enjoying the moment?

            A soft sigh, and dark lashes lifted partway.  Sleepy brown eyes regarded JC with curious warmth.

            “Good morning,” JC said, his hand stroking down Howie’s back.

            “Good morning,” Howie said, and the arm around JC’s waist tightened, pulling him closer.

            Ashley didn’t know how he knew that Joey was the one in bed with him, and not Nick.  True, if he opened his eyes he’d see the dark hair furring the forearm across his chest, but he could tell even with his eyes closed.  They were both bigger than he was, they both grew even warmer as they slept, they both tended to wrap him in a sleep-heavy embrace.  But there was something telltale about those embraces, something that distinguished them better than Joey’s habit of snoring in his ear.

            Even when Ashley was asleep with both of them in the same bed, before he opened his eyes in the morning, he knew which one of them was which.

            Joey was solid, warm, protective.  His arms were strong.  His embrace was designed to keep Ashley from going anywhere.  It made Ashley feel secure, cared for, protected.  He didn’t need to stay up at night worrying when he was in Joey’s arms.

            Nick’s embrace was intimate.  Nick didn’t just hold him; Nick blended their bodies.  An ankle tucked behind a calf, a hand splayed on the back of a thigh.  Ashley slept cheek to cheek with Nick, his fingers tangled in Nick’s hair, Nick’s breath on his neck.  Nick’s hands molded themselves to his body sensually, sexually, leaving no room for any doubt that they were in an erotic lover’s embrace.

            Sleeping with Joey was safer.  When Ashley wakened in Joey’s embrace he felt good, he felt ready to greet the day, he felt like he was in love and everything would be okay.

            When Ashley wakened in Nick’s embrace, he woke up craving.

            Justin let himself into his house, musing.  Apparently, he didn’t need Dan in his bed every night, after all.  He just needed some guy to hold him down and sleep on top of him.

            Of course, he didn’t intend to sleep with strange guys.  What was he supposed to do, say, “I want you to sleep with me, but no kissing, no touching, no groping, and you can’t tell the press?”  So he was limited to the four men he knew best.

            But what did that mean?  That he should bed-hop?  Let them take turns hosting him each week?  The other guys had fairly active sex lives, but maybe he could just shack up with Chris or something.

            It was either a feasible solution to his problem, or laughably stupid.  Or maybe both.

            For the time being, at least, Justin had Dan.  He didn’t need Dan to hold him down, either; he was content with having Dan behind him.  He liked having Dan behind him, secure against his back.

            Kevin at his back, Kevin spooned up behind him, all hard unyielding muscle, Kevin’s hands sliding over his hips, down his thighs, between his legs, Kevin’s voice low behind his ear, Kevin’s lips at the back of his neck.

            Justin turned, reaching for the phone, needing to call Kevin, needing to-

            The phone rang as soon as his hand touched it.  Startled, Justin snatched it up, breathless.  “Hello?”

            “Hey, it’s Dan.  Mind if I come over?”

            Dan.  Justin was flooded with grief and relief.  Sinking down to his knees, he leaned against the coffee table.  “Yeah, come, come on over.”  Justin rubbed his head with one hand, closing his eyes.  He didn’t know what he was doing with Dan.  Didn’t know what he’d do without Dan.  “How,” hell, Dan wasn’t Joey, he couldn’t ask that question.  “How’s Rebecca?”

            “She’s fine,” Dan said.  “How about you, how’d you sleep last night?”

            “I went home with Lance,” Justin said, immediately not sure why he was telling the truth.

            “That’s good,” Dan said.  “I wish I’d thought of that.”

            The doorbell rang.  Justin frowned, rising.  “Where are you?”

            “Outside,” Dan said.

            “What’d you do, call from the driveway?” Justin asked, crossing over and opening the door.

            “Hey,” Dan said, and tucked his phone in his pocket.  His smile was small and teasing, a mere hint of the full, wide, happy smile that put white teeth on display, but his eyes sparkled with life and warmth.

            “What are you doing here?” Justin asked, tugging Dan inside, closing the door, setting aside the phone.  “It’s early, you should be with Rebecca.”  Motivated by an urge he didn’t want to explore too closely, Justin embraced Dan, filling his arms with Dan, pulling Dan against his body.  Long arms wrapped around him, returning the embrace, and Justin closed his eyes.  Dan was in last night’s clothes, his shirt smelling like the club but his skin smelling like a woman’s soap.

            Justin didn’t want to let go.

            One hand rose, cupping the back of Dan’s neck, stroking the smooth skin of Dan’s nape up into short, soft hair.

            Dan gently began to pull back.  Justin tightened his hold, resisting.  There was no logic in it; Justin didn’t need Dan, he had himself, he had his friends, he’d be okay without Dan, he’d make it.  But he wanted Dan with him, he wanted Dan beside him.  Dan had dignity and integrity and confidence, Dan believed in good things and right things and Justin.

            When Dan had to leave him to work, to tour and promote, Justin understood that.  But last night, Dan had left him for sex.  Why?  Why couldn’t Dan just fuck him?  He was good, he could make it good, he’d been thoroughly trained.  There was nothing that Justin was too ashamed to do, no position too difficult, no act too degrading.  He was a good cunt, a sweet cunt, a delicious cunt.

            “Justin,” Dan said, his voice gentle but with a firmness behind it.  “Talk to me, tell me what’s going on.”

            “I want to go to him,” Justin said.  “I want him to come and get me.  I want him to call me to him.”

            Dan was trying to back up again, but Justin still didn’t want to let him go.  Dan pulled away but Justin pulled him back and when Dan gave in, their chests weren’t touching but their faces were close, Dan’s head bent with Justin’s hand still at his nape.  Dan’s mouth was right there, temptingly close, lips full and naturally red.  Justin’s hand slid from Dan’s nape forward, along his jaw, and Justin wondered if-

            “I’m here to be your friend,” Dan said, ducking Justin’s touch and stepping back, breaking their embrace.  “I am your friend, and I want to help you.  I’m flattered, Justin, I am, but we both know it’s not really me you want.”

            Justin shook his head, filled with shame and self-loathing and anger.  He was being rejected.  Because he wasn’t good enough.  Because no good man would ever want to touch him.  “You mean, it’s not me you want,” he snapped.  “What’s the matter, I don’t turn you on, I’m not hot enough, I’m not good enough?”

            “This doesn’t have to be a problem,” Dan said.  “I don’t want this to come between us.”

            “You would be lucky to have me in your bed!” Justin shouted.  “You would be fucking counting your lucky stars!  I can do things you’ve never fucking heard of!”

            “Anyone would be lucky to have you in his bed,” Dan said.  “Anyone would be lucky to have you in his life.  I’m in your bed every night, and I’m lucky to be there, I’m happy to be there.  But not for sex.  I don’t want your body, Justin, I want your friendship.”

            “You talk and you talk and you talk and what the hell does it mean?!” Justin demanded.  “What the hell good does that do me?!”

            “It means that I’m your friend,” Dan said.  His voice was firm, and it made Justin hear words, not just noise.  “It means that I want to help you, and I will do anything that I can to help you.  I’m here for you, Justin.  I’m not here to see how far I can get with your body or to spend your money or to tell all of my friends how great it is to be hanging out at Justin Timberlake’s house.  I’m here because I want what’s best for you, because I want you to be happy and in a safe place.”

            Justin felt miserable and alone.  “I just want you to fuck me.”

            Dan sighed, reaching out and dragging him in for a warm hug.  “No, you don’t,” Dan said, patting his shoulder.  “You want someone to love you and make love with you.  You just don’t know how to make that happen.”

            Trevor was talking to Chris about his dad and the turtle in Boston, when Chris’s phone rang.  Glancing at the caller ID, Chris made a sharp sound and clapped his hand over Trevor’s mouth, answering the phone hurriedly.  “Hello?”

            Trevor pushed Chris’s hand away, watching Chris’s eyebrows lower and raise and contract, watching Chris chew his lips anxiously.

            “Yes,” Chris said, “yes, I’ll be there.  Good-bye.”  He hung up.

            “Who was that?” Trevor asked, curious.

            “My ex-wife,” Chris said.  “From my third marriage.  She needs alimony.  I have to go.”

            “Okay,” Trevor said.  “Should it bother me that you lie to me?”

            “I don’t know,” Chris said.  “Nothing bothers me anymore.”  His kiss was soft but brief.  “I’ll be around later.”

            “Bye,” Trevor said, watching him go.  “Tell her I said hi.”

            Lance wanted to punch Jacob.  The urge to smack the bitch around was compelling.  “Stop fighting me!”

            The focused heat from Jacob’s glare suggested that Jacob wanted to hit Lance, too.  “I’m not fighting you,” he snapped.  “I just don’t see why I have to give it up to you again!  How the hell am I supposed to learn to fuck men if I always have your dick up my ass?”

            “You have to give it up to me again because you’re the worst lay I’ve ever had!”  Lance’s voice was sharp and disgusted.  “Brian’s not going to want you if you flop around like a dying fish!”

            “Maybe I’d move better if you gave me better instructions!” Jacob shot back.  “First I move too much, then I don’t move enough, then I’m pushing the rhythm of it, then I’m a dying fish - - I’m too quiet, I’m too noisy, I’m saying the wrong things, I’m not saying enough different things - - I’m touching you wrong, too roughly, too gently, in the wrong places - - and if you tell me one more fucking time that I’m moaning wrong, I’ll-”

            “Shut the fuck up,” Lance ordered.  “It’ll be a damned miracle if Brian ever wants you.  Do you bitch at him this much?”

            Jacob looked ready to claw Lance’s eyes out.

            Lance smiled.  Only Jacob could be spread naked under Lance’s body and still hold this kind of defiance.  Lance couldn’t fuck it out of him, either.  No matter what their bodies did, when it was over, they still hated each other.  “Open up.”

            With a “fuck you” look in his eyes, Jacob arranged his body into a “fuck me” position.

            Still smiling, Lance lubed his fingers, pushing first one, then two into Jacob’s ass.  No matter how often they did this, Jacob stayed as tight as he’d been the first time, maybe because of his small frame, maybe because of all of the tension he carried in his body.  Lance kissed him, and after a moment’s resistance, Jacob kissed back.  His mouth was soft, and the way he kissed always made Lance feel indescribably, irrationally sexy.

            Twisting his fingers free, Lance lifted Jacob’s hips against his dick, while Jacob sucked on his tongue and stroked his hair.  Jacob started to lower his knees and bring his thighs together, to shut Lance out.  Lance smacked his thigh and shoved his knees apart, not amused.  Jacob’s teeth grazed Lance’s lower lip in retaliation, but he held still.

            Hoping that maybe this time it would shut the fucker up, Lance slammed in, thrusting deep.  Jesus, Jacob was tight, and Lance had to hold still, focusing on his breathing, fighting the urge to come then and there.

            Beneath him, Jacob was panting.  Even just breathing, Jacob managed to sound pissed off.

            God.  Lance adjusted the angle of Jacob’s hips, sinking deeper inside, burying himself.  Oh, hell, yeah.

            “Get on with it,” Jacob muttered, running his hands over Lance’s chest.  “If I can’t hold still and let you do all of the damned work, neither can you.”

            The fucker was right.  Lance started moving, rocking back and thrusting forward, driving his dick into Jacob’s ass in a steady rhythm.  The hot grip felt incredible, urging him faster, faster.

            Underneath him, Jacob was rocking and moaning.  Lance didn’t know how much of it was authentic and how much of it was faked; that didn’t matter.  There was a fierceness to Jacob’s body, and when he rocked to meet Lance’s thrusts, when he twisted and writhed in an abandon of need, when he arched his back like Lance’s passion was taking over his body, he looked fucking wanton.  His hands were restless, on the move, squeezing and stroking and stimulating.  His eyes were bright with arousal, and the way he moaned and cursed sent fire through Lance’s blood.

            Even when Lance got forceful and manhandled Brian, he was careful, because Brian loved him, because Chris loved Brian.  He didn’t have to be careful with Jacob.  Sometimes he got rough; sometimes he got careless.  What irritated him most was that Jacob never seemed to mind it.

            “Slow down,” he snapped, gritting his teeth to hold back an impatient groan.  Jacob never matched his rhythm; Jacob always pushed the beat, moving a shade too quickly, rushing him.  In Lance’s mind, there was a difference between greedy bottoms and pushy bottoms, and Jacob was definitely pushy.  Lance hated that.

            “Fuck me,” pant, pant, “harder, damn it.”  Jacob scraped his short nails over Lance’s shoulders, then twisted Lance’s nipple until Lance cursed and had to bite his own tongue to keep from coming.  “Lance, you,” pant, “fuck me,” pant, pant, nipple twist, “faster.”  Jacob was moving impatiently, rocking beneath him, head tilting back, hands squeezing and twisting and scratching.

            Lance hiked Jacob’s hips up higher, smacking Jacob’s ass with one hand.  “You think Brian wants you to claw him?  Firm hands, not talons.”

            “Fuck you,” Jacob snapped, but he changed tactics, stroking more gently, his touch lighter as he dragged his nails up Lance’s back.

            Lance felt orgasm pushing up through his skin, and tried to clamp down on it, wanting to deny the way Jacob’s cries of pleasure made his dick throb that much more.  He wasn’t going to come before Jacob did, but he was sick of pleasuring the little fucker.  “Get yourself off.”

            Jacob grunted, taking himself in hand, driving his hips upward against Lance’s thrusts.  Tugging rhythmically on his dick, he grimaced, cursing and digging his nails into Lance’s shoulder.

            Lance smacked his ass again.  “Make him want you.  Put on a show.  Act like it feels good, not like it hurts.”

            “Fuck you.”  Panting harshly, Jacob gripped Lance’s hips with his thighs and levered himself up, pushing Lance upright and seating himself in Lance’s lap, pressing chest to chest and kissing Lance feverishly, jacking himself with one hand and stroking Lance’s neck with the other, tugging on Lance’s hair and caressing Lance’s face.  Lance kissed back with suddenly unleashed hunger, holding his hips and fucking him steadily.

            Lance still hated pushy bottoms, but he was starting to love fucking Jacob.

            Jacob went tense all over, grunting aggressively into their kiss, and cum splattered over Lance’s abs.  Lance fucked him harder, cupping his ass and rocking up into him.  Moaning hungrily, Jacob twined his arms around Lance’s shoulders, bringing their bodies closer and kissing Lance with focused passion.  Lance groaned at the sucking need of Jacob’s kiss and shuddered at the hot stroking of Jacob’s hands, slamming his dick deeply into Jacob’s tight ass.  Jacob was rocking on his dick and Jacob was feeling him up and Jacob was kissing him down to his soul and Lance didn’t know when he’d started coming but he couldn’t stop.

            Jacob lifted his head from Lance’s kiss and gave Lance a disgusted smirk.  “How was that for a show?”

            Lance shoved Jacob off of his lap.  “It might have gone better if you’d tried working out or growing an ass,” he snapped.  “I don’t like fucking someone whose body is so prepubescent he looks androgynous, and I doubt Brian would, either.”

            He barely heard Jacob’s furious comeback.  God, Jacob was a good fuck.  A completely unbearable asshole the rest of the time, but when he shut his mouth and spread his legs, damn, Lance didn’t mind fucking him at all.

            Lance smiled.

            Not at all.

            Chris didn’t mind paying for the privilege.  He paid in cash this time, handing over the money in a small brown paper bag.  Brian didn’t bother to count it, setting it aside and urging him to sit down before the food got cold.

            They ate lunch slowly, too busy watching each other to pay any attention to the food.  Chris couldn’t help it; he kept hitching his chair an inch to the right, edging around the table to get closer to Brian.  Finally Brian smiled at him and suggested that they have dessert in the other room.

            When Brian teasingly pushed Chris down on the sofa to sit against the armrest, Chris was more than happy to comply.  Brian sat between his thighs, leaning back comfortably against his chest, temple by his jaw.  Chris’s heart was hammering painfully fast, and Brian’s eyes were closed, and Chris fed Brian the fresh berries with his fingers, unable to resist stroking the satin of Brian’s lips.  Everything was still, the room quiet, the moment intimate, and Chris wished that time could stop and leave them alone together.

            After having Kevin ask him for a favor with enough regularity, Trevor had adopted his own habit.  Whenever he had an open chunk of free time, whenever Chris was otherwise occupied, he’d call Kevin and ask if there was anything that he could do.

            When Chris disappeared to go pay alimony to his third ex-wife, Trevor called Kevin.  Kevin laughed and told him to come over, so he did.

            Waking up in bed with Chris Kirkpatrick, spending the afternoon with Kevin Richardson: not a bad day in Trevor’s book.

            They moved Kevin’s massive and ridiculously heavy bed over a few feet to make room for the new chair, and then he messed around with Kevin’s printer until it cooperated.  Finished, he got up, putting his hands in his pockets and shifting his weight, exchanging a few minutes of small talk while he delayed the inevitable good-bye.

            “Do you want to stay for lunch?”

            Trevor tried to stay cool, like his entire nervous system hadn’t just started break dancing.  “Okay.”

            Kevin smiled.

            If Trevor hadn’t already been in love with Chris, he would’ve fallen in love with Kevin and that smile.

            Joey glared down at his plate, stabbing randomly with his fork.

            Raising his eyebrows, Nick asked, “What’s your problem?”

            “Nothing.”  Nothing except AJ.  Nothing except AJ and Justin.  Nothing except-

            “Something going on with Ashley?” Nick asked.

            “Not everything’s about Ashley,” Joey snapped.  He had bigger problems than Ashley.  Problems like having been instructed to tell Justin how to fuck AJ.

            “Okay.”

            He couldn’t say no to AJ.  He’d been through a lot.  AJ had torn through his life, disruptive and destructive and devastating.  But he never said no, hadn’t in a long time.

            Justin couldn’t give AJ what he could.  Justin couldn’t be for AJ what Joey was.

            Then why did Joey feel like he’d just been asked to train his replacement?

            Dan shoved his plate aside and slumped down further on the couch.  At his side, Justin did the same, letting out a satisfied belch that temporarily drowned out the movie’s soundtrack.  Dan had gotten laid last night, his stomach was full, his brain was congealing, everything was right again.

            His cell phone rang from the next room.

            Justin glanced at him.  “You gonna get that?”

            Dan considered the idea.  “It’s really far away.”

            “You left it over there,” Justin pointed out.

            “It’s probably not anyone important,” Dan said.

            “I’m not getting it for you,” Justin said.

            Dan thought about that.  “You could.”

            Justin made a dismissive noise and turned back to the movie.

            Dan sighed.  Even if it wasn’t anyone important, he wanted to know that for a fact and not simply guess it.  Pushing himself up from the sofa, he ignored Justin’s smug chuckle and walked into the next room, picking up his phone and checking the - - AJ!  Shit!

            Fuck.

            Dan kept his voice quiet.  “What do you want?”

            “We’re going to be civil about this,” AJ ordered.  “Don’t give me attitude, Danny.”

            Dan swallowed his retort and affected a calmer tone.  “What do you want?”

            “I want Justin,” AJ said, “but I’ll settle for you.  Come over to my house.”

            Dan hated it, but he’d agreed.  He’d known that this would happen.  “When?”

            “Now.”  AJ hung up.

            Dan cursed, lowering the phone.

            Fuck.

            It’d be okay.  He’d go over there, and he’d answer AJ’s questions.  He’d give AJ information on Justin, just like they’d agreed.  They had an arrangement, and he’d hold up his end of the bargain.

            He’d tell AJ how Justin was, what Justin was wearing, what Justin was eating, and whatever else AJ wanted to know.

            And then…

            If AJ pushed for something beyond conversation…

            Dan’s eyes drifted to the doorway.

            He’d made promises, to Justin and to himself.  He was going to make sure that Justin was safe and healthy.  Justin wasn’t going to have to worry about AJ ever again.

            AJ was Dan’s problem now.

            Brian and Chris made love, slow and steamy, luxuriating in each other’s bodies, thrilling to each other’s responses.

            When it was over, Brian nuzzled Chris, and Chris held Brian close, and Brian whispered silken words of eternal love.

            “Thanks for lunch.”  Trevor wondered when he’d be able to say that he was friends with Kevin Richardson.  He was starting to feel that day approaching pretty rapidly.

            There was something friendly and amused in Kevin’s smile, something sparkling in his eyes.  “Thanks for coming over.”

            “No problem,” Trevor said honestly.  “Any time.”  If he stayed a minute longer, he’d make an ass out of himself.  He couldn’t turn his gaze away from Kevin, so he reached behind himself, feeling for the doorknob.  “Let me know if you want to move your bed again.”  Had that sounded stupidly suggestive, or just plain stupid?

            “Let me get that,” Kevin said, reaching, and Trevor took a step to the side just as his hand and Kevin’s found the doorknob at the same time.  Trevor knew that he was supposed to let go, but Kevin wasn’t letting go, and all he could do was stare into those compelling green eyes and feel his heart pound in his chest.

            “You…”  Kevin was gazing into his eyes, and Trevor was so held in place by Kevin’s piercing stare that he couldn’t blink.  Kevin blinked, and took a step closer, and Trevor was barely breathing.  “How’s Chris?” Kevin asked.

            Trevor didn’t know whether Kevin bringing up Chris at that moment was the best or the worst thing possible.  “I’m in love with him,” Trevor said, maybe in answer to Kevin’s question, maybe to remind himself of something he should be taking into account.

            “Right,” Kevin said, like that was important and he almost remembered why.

            “He’s not in love with me,” Trevor said.  Somehow that seemed like an explanation of something.  “We’re not even boyfriends.”

            Kevin’s thumb rubbed across the back of Trevor’s hand, and Trevor’s dick hardened.  “You’re not?”

            “No,” Trevor said.  He was starting to believe that Kevin Richardson actually might want to kiss him.  He’d begin to hyperventilate at any second.

            Slowly, Kevin’s gaze roamed Trevor’s features, etching out every detail.  “I’m sure that you must make him very…happy.”  Kevin’s hand slid up just enough to cover Trevor’s hand fully, an intimate press of flesh.  “He’s luckier than he knows.”

            The burning desire in Kevin’s eyes was setting Trevor on fire.  He’d never been faced with anything like it before.

            Kevin’s hand lifted; he stepped back, and Trevor watched the intensity and the desire bleed out of his gaze.  In its place was nearly disguised regret.  “Thank you for coming over.”

            “Yeah,” Trevor said, grateful that he was at least somewhat coherent.  “I’ll… see you.”  Opening the door, he tore his gaze away from Kevin and left.

            What had just happened?  Trevor walked to his car in a daze.  Had Kevin just come on to him?  Had Kevin just hinted at something?  Did Kevin want him?

            If he had said the right thing, would Kevin have kissed him?

            AJ had decided to make a half-assed attempt to be nice to Dan, but after Dan had been in his home for thirty seconds, he could sense that plan being shot to hell.  “No?” he repeated, feeling hostility rise.

            “I’m not going to sit down like this is a regular civilized conversation,” Dan said.

            “And I’m not going to stand up all damned afternoon,” AJ snapped.

            “This isn’t taking all afternoon,” Dan said, like it was a warning.

“I don’t know what you think is going on, but you’re on my time, now, and this is going to take as long as it takes,” AJ said.  “You’re in my house, you do what I say, and I’m telling you to sit your ass down.”  He didn’t know if it was the violence in his voice or the threat in his eyes or the command in his gesture, but Dan’s common sense kicked in, and Dan sat.

Glaring but mollified, AJ sat beside him on the sofa.  “What’s Justin wearing?”

            Dan’s voice was a little tight; he clearly resented AJ’s mere existence.  But he answered the question.  “Jeans, no shoes, no socks, white T-shirt.”

            White T-shirt.  “Wifebeater?” AJ asked.

            A look of pure disgust crossed Dan’s face; he probably didn’t like the term, especially coming from someone who beat his boyfriend.  “Ribbed tank.”

            AJ’s mind began to fill in the picture.  “Jewelry?”

            “He’s wearing a gold bracelet, gold and emerald.”

            In other words, Justin was wearing the bracelet that AJ had told Dan to buy for him.  “He likes it,” AJ said.

            “He does,” Dan reluctantly admitted.

            AJ asked more questions, more, more, pushing for details, pressing Dan to complete the picture for him.  He wanted to know everything about Justin’s wardrobe, Justin’s eating habits, the way Justin spent his nights, the hours Justin slept, the way Justin smiled, the way Justin laughed.

            Dan was describing the scent of Justin’s soap as it hung in the thick, steamy air after Justin’s shower, when he cut himself off.  “I’ve given you my time, and I’ve given you information.  You’ve had your chance to interrogate me.”

            “I’ll uphold my end of the agreement and tell you how to help Justin,” AJ said, “but first you have to give me what I want.”

            Dan’s gaze focused sharply.  “You don’t want me,” he said.  “I know you don’t want me, and you’ve never pretended to like me, so why are you pushing for this?  I’m not having sex with Justin, so you can’t use that excuse.”

            AJ’s eyes narrowed.  “I don’t have to explain myself to you.  We have a deal, and you know the terms of it.  Are you backing out or not?”

            “No,” Dan said.  He lifted his chin, and fire crackled in AJ’s veins.  “I know what we agreed, and I know what I committed to.”

            “Good,” AJ said.  Dan wasn’t playing for sympathy, and AJ was oddly pleased.  “Take your clothes off.”

            Dan’s expression tightened.  “If you want to use me to get off, you can do it while I’m dressed.”

            Bracing one hand on the back of the couch, AJ leaned forward, into Dan’s space.  “If you want to hear how you can help Justin, you’ll get naked.”

            Dan inhaled, studying him.

            “If you cooperate, I can make this easy on you,” AJ said.  “Fight me on it, and things can get rough.”

            There was no shiver in Dan’s voice, only a too-quiet calm.  “Are you going to take me to your bed and fuck me?”

            AJ didn’t owe Dan a heads-up, but he did admire the fact that Dan had the balls to ask and the self-preservation to make it a calm question.  “It’s happening right here,” he said.  “And how I get off is up to you.  If you don’t want it to be in your ass, you’d better make it happen another way.”  Leaving Dan to think about that, AJ rose and began to undress.  “Tip number one, bring Justin waffles from Popper’s.  Blueberry waffles with a bunch of blueberry shit and whipped cream.”  AJ was half-undressed and Dan was still sitting there; AJ snapped his fingers in Dan’s face.  “Get your ass up and naked.  Unless you have a deformity to hide.  Is that it?  You aren’t fucking Justin because you don’t have the dick to do it with?”

            Dan had been looking down, probably to avoid looking at AJ.  Now that they were making eye contact, Dan’s gaze flashed over AJ’s naked torso quickly.  “The question isn’t why I’m not having sex with Justin,” Dan said.  “The question is why he ever let you touch him.”

            AJ grabbed the front of Dan’s shirt, jerking Dan forward, stepping aside to bring Dan’s face inches from his groin.  “I gave you what you want.”  His hand tightened.  “Give me what I want.”

            For a long moment they were at an impasse, Dan preferring to glare up into AJ’s eyes than glance down at AJ’s crotch.  When AJ released Dan’s shirt and ran his fingers along the beard defining Dan’s jaw, Dan jerked back, offended by the flirtatious touch.

            “I can see why he wants you,” AJ said, reaching out again, fingertips brushing Dan’s lips before Dan flinched away.  “You’re handsome.  You’re his tall, dark, handsome hero, aren’t you?  You’re his rescuer, his white knight, and you don’t even ask him for sex.  Are you telling me that when he’s naked in your arms at night, needy and vulnerable, and the room’s dark and you haven’t gotten laid in weeks and his ass is right there for you, you don’t think about it?  When your arms are wrapped around him, and your thighs are pressed to his, and his back is tight against your chest, and his ass is tucked right into your groin, where are your hands?”  AJ knelt on the sofa, across Dan’s thighs, bracing himself as Dan shoved him, locking his hands over Dan’s shoulders as Dan tried to push him back.

            “Get off of me,” Dan ordered.

            “Where do you put your hands?” AJ asked again, ignoring Dan’s displeasure, wrapping one arm around Dan’s shoulders and leaning in close, skimming his fingertips down Dan’s cheek, across Dan’s lips.  “Do you put them on his chest?  Do your fingers ever…innocently…brush his nipples?”  Obsessive need dripped into AJ’s voice.  “Do you touch his hard chest?  Do you put your hands on his abs and feel the muscles ripple when he moves?  Do you feel him breathe?”

            “Get off of me,” Dan said, quiet and angry, eyes flashing.

            “Do you get hard against him?” AJ asked, sliding his hand up the long column of Dan’s neck, kissing Dan’s mouth for a split second before Dan turned his face away, growling softly into Dan’s ear.  “Does he feel how hard you are?  Does he know why?  Do you rub it against him, just a little, just to know what it feels like?  Do you wonder what it would be like to-”

            Dan’s hand was on AJ’s throat, dangerously firm, and the fury in Dan’s eyes threatened to spiral out of control.  “One more word,” Dan threatened, “and you’ll be the one bruised and crying.”

            Heedless of Dan’s barely leashed fury, disregarding the hand tightening on his neck, AJ kissed Dan.  When Dan didn’t kiss him back, AJ growled, sinking his teeth into Dan’s lower lip.  Dan made a shocked, pained, furious noise, mouth opening, and AJ’s tongue swept in, AJ’s hands yanking up Dan’s T-shirt.

            Dan refused to kiss AJ back, trying to jerk away but caught by the sting of teeth, belatedly releasing AJ’s neck to fight AJ’s hands on his clothes.  Under Dan’s shirt, AJ roughly rubbed his thumbs over Dan’s nipples, feeling them harden into tight nubs at his touch, and he growled in pleasure, scratching Dan’s chest with his nails.

            With an angry, fed up, frustrated sound, Dan’s aggression turned sexual.  He kissed AJ back with enraged fervor, hands traveling AJ’s body with hot agitation, gripping and squeezing.  AJ’s low, animal sounds of sexual enjoyment only seemed to infuriate Dan; with his own heated growl, he pushed AJ, hard.

            Falling back to the thickly carpeted floor, AJ took Dan with him, landing roughly but not caring, jerking impatiently at Dan’s shirt until Dan tore it off and tossed it aside, kissing him furiously.  AJ eagerly felt over Dan’s naked torso, taking the measure of Dan’s shoulders, stroking the long arch of Dan’s spine, caressing smooth skin and marking pale flesh and twisting tight nipples.  Dan’s body wasn’t as thick as Joey’s or as tightly muscled as Justin’s, and the softness of his smooth, young skin intrigued AJ’s questing hands.  There was an appealing strength in his aggression and in the way he was pinning AJ down and in the demanding grip of his hands.

Their hips were grinding together harshly, the rough friction making AJ’s erection throb.  He could feel Dan’s hard-on rubbing over his, long and thick and rock-hard, and he clawed Dan’s fly open to get to it.  Chewing on Dan’s lips, he worked down Dan’s boxer-briefs and filled his hands with the thick length of Dan’s dick.  It pulsed in his palms and spit pre-cum against his fingers, and when he squeezed it, Dan groaned and cursed and bit his jaw, grabbing his hips and holding him down.

AJ didn’t like being pinned down.  He fought back, rolling them over and getting on top, devouring Dan’s mouth while jerking open his own jeans, wriggling and kicking free, rocking against Dan with naked need.  Their bodies strained against each other, seeking even temporary satisfaction.  It was hard for AJ to find a partner who could keep up; Dan was not only keeping up, he was pushing AJ.  They matched each other grind for grind, grip for grip, bite for bite, fighting through sex, their bodies their battleground.

            Just when AJ could feel his body driving towards orgasm, Dan pushed him onto his back, jerking his hips closer.  AJ rocked up against Dan with crude force, groaning at the way Dan kneaded his ass and gripped his waist and fucked against his stomach.  The hard ridge of Dan’s erection and the impassioned fury of Dan’s kiss and the rough impossibly covetous grasp of Dan’s hands pushed all of AJ’s buttons, and before he knew it, he was howling and cursing, feeling powerful spasms wrack his body.  He was barely finished when Dan stiffened over him and made a sudden, low, primal noise, shooting hot cum onto AJ’s naked chest.

            AJ growled with warm satisfaction.

            After one second of still silence, Dan was pushing himself off of AJ’s body, getting up from the floor.  Before Dan could yank on scattered clothes, AJ’s hot gaze took inventory.  Dan had an attractive, slender body with long limbs, pale skin that apparently bruised and reddened easily, gorgeous dark nipples, and a dick that made AJ want to get fucked.

            AJ sat up slowly, watching Dan dress, absently running his fingers through the drying jism on his chest.  Dan was rushing, agitated, clearly ready to bolt.  AJ smiled.  Dan could run now.  He’d be back later.

“I’ll call you,” AJ said.

Dan left without so much as a glance in AJ’s direction.

AJ laughed.  Feeling good, he rose, going to the windows and watching Dan’s car leave the driveway.  He hadn’t expected to find anyone who flipped his switch among this pathetic set of people, but it was a nice discovery.  Already he could feel anticipation beginning to hum through his blood.  There were people he fucked for fun, and people he fucked for convenience; he had semi-regular sex partners with no strings attached and he had former girlfriends who were always good for a booty call; he had people he was deeply genuinely soulfully in love with and he had people he fucked around with for a good time; and he had Joey, who gave him an incredible fuck on a moment’s notice whenever he felt like giving his body some real, bone-deep satisfaction.

Joey gave a terrific ride, and whenever AJ was finished with Joey, he felt a sense of deep calm, like the peace after a wild storm.

Half of him sensed that Dan would be the same way.

Half of him sensed that Dan would be different, that Dan wouldn’t give him that sense of calm.  That he’d never be finished with Dan.

That was a challenge.

AJ smiled, baring his teeth.

            Brian’s eyes were soft and warm.  Chris wanted to live in them.

            “Love me,” Brian whispered, gazing into his eyes, gently touching his face.  “Love me forever.”

            “What’s going on with you?” Joey asked, taking a seat at Justin’s kitchen table.

            “Not much,” Justin said, uncapping a beer and handing it over, sitting opposite Joey.  “I made an ass of myself in front of Dan today, but I think he’s used to it by now.”

            “What happened?” Joey asked.

            Maybe it hadn’t been that bad.  After all, he hadn’t said, “Fuck me.”  He’d just said, “I’m pathetic and needy and a well-trained whore,” or words that meant the same thing.  “Nothing,” Justin said.  He’d already embarrassed himself in front of Dan; he didn’t have to do it in front of Joey, too.  “What about you?”

            “Not much,” Joey said.

            Justin watched Joey drink, waiting for more.  It was obvious that Joey had come over to tell him something or ask him something, but so far Joey had just fumbled around.  It was weird; Justin hadn’t seen Joey not be able to say what needed to be said since…  “Did something happen with AJ?”

            Joey avoided Justin’s eyes.  That was a bad sign.  Joey never had trouble meeting Justin’s eyes.  “AJ called me.”

            “Yeah?” Justin asked.  If AJ had done something to hurt Joey…

            “He asked me to talk to you.”

            Justin wondered why.  What would AJ want to tell him, that would make AJ go through a third party?  If AJ ever had anything to say, it was said, directly.  “About what?” Justin asked.

            “About sex.”

            Justin raised his eyebrows.  He was pretty sure that he knew everything there was to know about sex.  His education at Kevin’s hands had been thorough and complete.  “What about sex?”

            Joey met his eyes, distinctly uncomfortable.  “AJ likes a specific style of sex.  It’s kind of rough.  It’s physical.”

            AJ did have a tendency to manhandle Justin.  “Okay.”  Were he and Joey going to talk about AJ and sex?  They’d talked about sex with women a lot over the years, but never sex with men.  Whatever AJ and Joey did together was none of Justin’s business.

            “He likes to be touched pretty firmly,” Joey said.  “With a firm grip.”

            Justin had to clear something up before the conversation continued.  “Why are you telling me this?”

            Joey set down his bottle.  “He asked me to tell you what he likes.”

            That was insulting, but Justin was used to being insulted by AJ.  “I think that I can figure it out on my own.”

            Joey let go of the bottle.  “He asked me to tell you.”

            Justin frowned at that.  “Meaning what, meaning I can’t figure it out on my own?”

            “I just have more experience with him,” Joey said.  “He likes to be-”

            Justin realized with mild horror that Joey was about to launch into a full explanation of AJ’s sexual tastes.  “Are you serious?  We’re really going to do this?  Joey, I’ve had sex with AJ.  I know what he’s into.”

            “Just listen to me so I can get this done,” Joey said.  “If you knew him that well, he wouldn’t have asked me to talk to you.”

            Justin took a steadying breath.  “I don’t want to go there with you,” he told Joey.  “JC and Lance do enough of that for all of us.”  He studied the way Joey’s hands twisted the beer bottle.  Joey never displayed any physical signs of nervous agitation, but today he seemed pretty worked up.  Apparently he didn’t want to have this conversation any more than Justin did.  But AJ had asked him to do it, so here he was.

            Boy, did Justin know what that was like.  “Okay,” he said, rising and going to the fridge, coming back and setting another bottle before Joey before resuming his seat.  “You talk, I’ll listen, let’s get this over with.”

            While they both stared at the tabletop to avoid each other’s eyes, Joey told Justin what AJ wanted.  How to grope him, how to jack his dick, how to kiss him with passion and force, how to push him and pull him and give him something to struggle against.  How to fuck him, how to jerk his thighs apart and slam in; that it was okay to take him in any position on any surface; that he wouldn’t come with anything in him, which frustrated him; that when AJ was frustrated, everything only got hotter.

            Justin already knew that AJ liked having his nipples licked and rubbed, but hadn’t known that he liked having them bitten.  He didn’t necessarily want to know that Joey bit AJ’s nipples, or think about Joey sucking AJ’s dick, or picture Joey licking AJ’s ass.

            The more Joey talked, the more details he gave, the less Justin wanted to hear.  It was true that Joey knew everything; he could have written a four-volume sex manual on how to fuck AJ.  But Justin wasn’t comfortable with thinking about Joey fucking AJ, and was even less comfortable with thinking about AJ fucking Joey.  He hated AJ; he loved Joey; he hated thinking about them together; he hated thinking about Joey making himself so sexually available to AJ.

            As extensive as Justin’s sexual education was, it had missed one area.  And that was the area that Joey was talking about.  Being forceful, being dominant, creating sex as a physical struggle.  Joey was describing sex between two physical equals, who slammed each other against walls and threw each other across beds and fucked each other and pushed each other around.  Justin hadn’t been trained to do that.  Push Kevin?  Fuck Kevin?  Use force against Kevin?  Justin had never been physically weak, and he had more muscle mass now than he’d had before, but he’d never once considered using it with Kevin.

            He hadn’t been taught to be a physical match for his male partners.  He’d been taught to be submissive.  He’d been taught to acquiesce.  He could take the initiative, he could be bold enough to make a move towards what he wanted, sometimes…  But push and wrestle and fuck?  Fight for control?

            AJ wasn’t Kevin.  AJ wouldn’t yell at him.  AJ wouldn’t whip him.  AJ wouldn’t break him.

            Justin thought about the sex that he and AJ had been having.  It didn’t sound like what Joey was describing, but it hadn’t been crappy, either.  AJ must have liked it.  It wasn’t like Justin kept begging AJ for sex and AJ gave it to him out of pity; it was mutual, something that they both enjoyed.  If AJ didn’t want him, AJ wouldn’t encourage him, wouldn’t offer, wouldn’t take more.

            It wasn’t like Justin was fucking himself on the table, then dragging himself down to the floor for round two.  He had plenty of aggressive, heated help.

            AJ had a great thrust.  Not that Justin had anything to compare it with, other than Kevin.  But AJ had a terrific thrust, very rhythmic but also fast, a steady pounding.  There was a lot of power behind it, pure muscular force, stamina; he’d get his dick in there and the pistoning would begin, and no matter what else happened, that steady thrust-thrust-thrust would create a metronomic sensation that took over Justin’s body.

            Justin didn’t know why AJ had told Joey to talk to him.  He tried not to listen, because it disturbed him to think about AJ and Joey in bed together.  It disturbed him to think about Joey in bed with Nick, too.  It bothered him less to think about Joey with Ashley.  Ashley practically had a vagina.

            Realizing that Joey had finally stopped talking, Justin cleared his throat and met Joey’s eyes.  “I’ll…  Thanks.  I’ll keep that in mind.”  What was he supposed to say?  Thanks for the sex tips?

            Joey muttered something, and Justin mumbled a response, and Joey left.  Closing the door, Justin realized how hard it must have been for Joey to do that.  Justin would never coach Chris on what Kevin wanted from a lover.  It would be too much like training his replacement.

            Justin wondered what Kevin was doing.

            He called.

            He wondered how Dan was dealing with AJ.

            Dan entered the house quietly, hurrying upstairs, making it to the bathroom without being seen.  Locking the door, he stripped quickly, turning on the shower.

            He had to shower and change before he went back to Justin.  He wasn’t going to show up at Justin’s house with AJ’s cum sticking his shirt to his stomach.

            He’d come on AJ.  He’d seen it, glimpsed it briefly before averting his gaze.  His cum, splattered across AJ’s abs, stray specks of it up AJ’s chest.  Smears of it over the tattoo around AJ’s navel.

            He’d bitten AJ.  He distinctly remembered putting his teeth to the side of AJ’s jaw.

            There were scratches on his neck.  His skin was probably under AJ’s painted nails.

            Dan leaned over the sink, bracing his hands, staring at his reflection in the mirror.  He met his own eyes with straightforward determination.  He knew the man who looked back.

            He wasn’t going to let himself be lost to confusion or shame.  He knew what he was doing.  He was aware of his choices.  He had his motives.

            He was going to get what he could from AJ.  He was going to do what AJ wanted, to keep AJ away from Justin.  He’d probably face AJ’s sexual aggression again.  He’d probably, if the situation led in that direction, fuck AJ.

            He wasn’t going to tell anyone.  Not even the guys, and definitely not Justin.

            He’d do what needed to be done.

            He wasn’t proud of himself.  He wasn’t happy with the compromises being made.  But he could still meet his own eyes in the mirror.  He still recognized himself.  He wasn’t going to let AJ shame him, and he wasn’t going to shrink away from his commitments.

            He had to take care of Justin.

            As far as AJ was concerned, Dan could handle himself.

            Lance hated Jacob for several reasons.  He had plenty of ammunition there.  One of the most personally frustrating reasons was that when he fucked himself dry with Jacob, he had nothing left when he saw Brian immediately after.

            It was safe to visit Brian after fucking Jacob; he could even spend the night.  Jacob always took a day or two away from Brian after letting Lance fuck him.  Brian’s theory was that Jacob was feeling too dirty and ashamed and confused to be able to face him.  Lance’s theory was that Jacob was a self-absorbed, overly dramatic little shit.

            Lance didn’t have much left in him to fuck Brian with, but he used his fingers and his tongue, and Brian writhed and begged and came twice.  Lance had been almost exclusively a dick fucker, before Howie.  He’d been so in love with Howie there had been no barriers, and he’d tried a lot of new things in those days, including new sexual practices.  He’d discovered that he liked rimming.  Really liked rimming.  A lot.  Maybe that had been in part because of the way Howie reacted to it.

            …muscular thighs parting, firm ass lifting, skin smooth as satin against Lance’s hands…

            Howie had enjoyed all of Lance’s sexual attention.  He’d wanted Lance.  He’d loved getting fucked.  He’d acted like Lance’s touch was the most arousing thing he’d ever encountered.  And he’d thrived on being rimmed.  He’d moaned and arched and groaned Lance’s name; he’d even developed the habit of reaching back with one hand to cup the back of Lance’s head, encouraging Lance to give him more.

            Lance didn’t know what Howie was getting from JC.  The only ass JC was interested in was his own.

            Brian’s warm tongue flicked against Lance’s temple as Brian’s fingers slid across Lance’s collarbone.  “He’s so lucky,” Brian murmured, kissing Lance’s ear.  “I’ve been wanting you to make love to me, I’ve been wanting you inside of me.  And he got it, he felt your big, hard, long, thick dick driving deep into him.”  Brian’s hand slid down Lance’s thigh as Brian’s tongue slid around the shell of Lance’s ear.  “Does he beg you for it like I do?”  Brian’s teeth grazed his earlobe while Brian’s hand cupped his balls, and Lance felt himself tensing, turned on despite himself.  “Does he need it like I do?”  Brian’s licking kisses trailed down Lance’s jaw and up the other side of Lance’s neck; Brian paused at Lance’s mouth, lust-filled eyes opening.  “Does he love you like I do?”

            Lance just breathed, lost in Brian’s eyes.  “No,” he said, nearly whispering it.  “No one does.”

First Jacob had come home, snapped at Trevor so viciously he practically bled from it, and disappeared into the guest house.  Then, someone had run upstairs and ducked into the shower so fast, Trevor hadn’t even sure who it had been.

His only choices were, Dan, Ashley, or Erik.  Ashley was already in the house, and Dan was probably with Justin somewhere.  Only Erik would have a reason to avoid everyone deliberately like that.

            Trevor waited, but no one came down.

            His thoughts dwelled on Erik.

            Hostility simmered.

            Anger grew.

            Ashley was upstairs.  If the two of them were up there fighting; or, worse, if Erik was up there convincing Ashley to forgive him-

            Just as Trevor was about to put his foot on the first step, Dan came down the stairs.  Startled, Trevor moved back.  “Hey.”

            “Hey.”  Dan stopped in front of him.  “How’s everything been?  Has Erik been around?”

            “I haven’t seen him,” Trevor said.  “I don’t know whether to worry about that or just be grateful.”

            Dan sighed.  “I’ll call him.”

            Trevor wanted to discuss what an asshole Erik was, but since Erik had fucked Dan’s girlfriend, not his, he thought that if anyone were going to bring it up, Dan should be the one.

            “What else has been going on?” Dan asked.  “How’s Chris, the mice, Ashley’s love life?”

            “You want the short version or the long version?” Trevor asked.

            “Give me the long version,” Dan said.

            Trevor grinned.  “Justin doesn’t need you?”

            “I told him I might not get back until later,” Dan said.  “Catch me up on everything around here.”

            “He’s on his way.”  Howie tucked JC’s hair behind his ears for him, gazing into distracted eyes.  “What do you need from me to make this work?”

            “I want him,” JC said.  He rotated his bracelets, a sign of agitation.  “I want him, I do, I just don’t know if I want this.  He’s not very good.  He doesn’t know what he’s doing, and absence hasn’t given him any more experience.”

            “I’ll be there,” Howie promised.  “I’ll be right there with you, and I’ll coach him through it.”  He smiled, touching the sharp rise of JC’s cheekbone.  “I know what you like.”  JC’s gaze focused on him; JC smiled back in recognition.  “I know how you like to be kissed,” Howie said, and brushed his lips over JC’s in a soft, light kiss.  “I know how you like to be touched,” he murmured, and his fingertips skimmed down the center of JC’s chest as JC sucked in a slow breath.  “I know how you like to be fucked,” Howie whispered, and kissed him again, deeply, ruling his mouth, the passion building between them, JC’s hands sliding possessively across Howie’s chest.

            When the doorbell rang, Howie ended their kiss with a slow lick, running his fingers over the thickening ridge of JC’s hard-on through JC’s jeans.  “I’ll make sure you get what you need.”

            When Howie opened the door and brought Erik into the house, as soon as the door was closed he kissed Erik, bringing Erik close enough to his body to feel his arousal.  Erik was eager and horny and, in many ways, still very inexperienced; JC was pampered and snobbish and sophisticated.  It would have been difficult to find someone less naturally attracted to Erik than JC, whose standards were so high Howie was surprised he let anyone touch him; but Howie had to make the night as hot and as memorable as he could, for both of them.

            In the bedroom, Howie undressed JC slowly from behind, with lingering caresses and soft whispers, brushing tender kisses over freshly bared skin.  JC undressed Erik, Erik and Howie’s hands meeting on JC’s body.  When they crawled onto the bed, climbing over each other, Howie tugged Erik into his arms, meeting Erik’s mouth for a wet, lusting kiss.  Erik pulled at Howie’s clothes, and Howie sighed warmly as Erik’s hands slipped underneath his shirt to stroke his skin.  “This isn’t about me,” Howie said, turning slightly to rub himself into Erik’s touch.  “This is about you and JC.”

            “Everything’s about you,” Erik said, pulling down his pants and caressing his ass and thighs with hungry hands.  When Howie kissed Erik with appreciative aggression, Erik moaned, one hand rubbing insistently up the back of Howie’s thigh while the other felt over Howie’s dick with adoring greed.

            Howie let Erik undress him, and then he let Erik suck his dick while he made out with JC.  JC’s experienced touch and complex kisses were the perfect complement to the possessive stroking of Erik’s hands and the rich haven of Erik’s mouth.  While Erik slurped on his dick, Howie kissed to JC’s ear and whispered, “I wish I were fucking you right now.  I want to be inside you so much I can feel it.  Can you feel it?”

            JC groaned, thighs instinctively spreading, hand sliding down Howie’s chest.  “Give it to me,” he urged, hips rolling forward.  “Fuck me.”  His voice betrayed him; JC wasn’t just saying the words; JC was feeling them, living them.  Howie had been feeding and fueling JC’s sexual needs to the point where their bodies and desires were highly attuned to each other, and all it took was the right word, the right touch, the right glance for the fire to ignite.

            “Erik-Michael will fuck you,” Howie said, raising his voice for Erik’s benefit.  “He’ll fuck you nice and slow, baby, he’ll give you just what you need.”  He moaned softly, stroking Erik’s hair with one hand, thighs tensing.  Mmm.  Not bad.  “I know how much you’ve been wanting it.”  He’d spent half of his afternoon finger-fucking JC, making JC beg and cry out Erik’s name.  “He wants you, too, JC, can’t you feel it when he touches you?”

            JC moaned, kissing him hungrily, stroking his neck and grinding against his hip.  Howie sighed with pleasure into JC’s kiss and came down Erik’s rapidly swallowing throat.  “Hmm…”  He stretched slightly, rubbing the back of Erik’s neck and sucking softly on JC’s tongue.  “Mmm, that was amazing.”  Looking down his own body, Howie cupped his hand under Erik’s chin, rubbing his thumb over the fuzz there, coaxing Erik closer.  Erik crawled up to kiss him, and Howie permitted himself to make a pleased sound into Erik’s mouth, urging Erik to settle against his body.  There was a need, a desire, an unsatisfied wanting in the way Erik’s hands stroked over Howie’s flesh, that did pleasant things to Howie’s ego.  The way Erik caressed his nipples make them ache, and when Erik’s dick pushed insistently against Howie’s stomach, Erik whispered, “Oh you feel so good,” right by his ear.

            “I want to watch you with JC,” Howie said, kissing Erik’s cheek.  “I want to watch you make each other so hot you come.”  He ran his fingers over Erik’s Adam’s apple, briefly flashing back to Lance, then kissed it, tongue flicking out.  “He’s been wanting you.”  Howie licked at Erik’s lips, gazing into lust-flooded brown eyes.  “I know you can give him what he needs.”

            Erik’s gaze slid to the side, finding JC; for a moment he was still, transfixed, staring in utter fascination.  Howie smiled, chuckling softly in amusement, and kissed his cheek, patting his hip, sending him on his way.  Erik crawled onto JC, murmuring something like, “Oh, god,” before kissing JC’s mouth suddenly, like if he didn’t take it by surprise he’d be denied access.

            Howie sat up, running his fingers through his hair, watching them kiss.  JC’s pale skin made Erik’s look richer; he stroked Erik’s back, listening to the soft sounds of kissing, Erik’s hungry moans, JC’s delicate groans.  He could tell the minor differences in sound when JC was faking it, and JC was starting to fake it.  When JC started shifting uncomfortably, Howie took that as a plea for help and shifted into position behind Erik, kneeling astride JC’s legs and leaning forward over Erik’s back, kissing Erik’s nape and licking gen