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July 13, 2010
Posting a new Drewsome slice! A few months ago, over at my LiveJournal, I invited readers to take part in an auction. Whoever donated the most money to Haiti in the wake of the recent earthquake would receive a story on the subject of her choice. Brenhamella donated the most money and won a Drewsome slice. Which I've written and now am posting. Many thanks to Brenhamella and everyone else who participated.
April 28, 2010
The site is coming back up! I'm still working on details, but the bulk
of it should be functional.
My apologies to anyone who thought that I'd taken SU down. Believe me, this wasn't intentional, and I have no plans whatsoever to close Sweet Uncleanness.
I have a new webhost now. Not a great one, but at least the site's up, so that's good!
Thank you to everyone, old readers and new readers. It would be a sad, sad thing if SU collapsed and no one noticed, so I appreciate the warnings and questions and concern.
I should have a new "Slice" to post up in the next week or so. Fingers crossed.
Last, but not least: thank you a hundred times over to all of the bannerists. You guys are the best.
February 7, 2009
Hi, "Sucker" readers!
Quick poll.
I hesitate to tell you why I'm asking, because if things don't pan out
you'll seek revenge, and that won't be fun for me.
Thanks for voting!
November 13, 2008
Sweet Uncleanness turned eight years
old on Tuesday!
Confetti!
Here's a "Sucker" short to celebrate. Or a "Sucker" long. Or a long short story. It's a slice of the back story. A glimpse into life before "Sucker" started, when things were going well, and everyone was happy. Well, almost everyone.
I wrote it, and thought that I'd posted it. Then I realized that I hadn't, and decided to post it. (See the April 18th post directly below.) Then I thought that I'd posted it, and (again) realized that I hadn't. But here it is! Shiny and new, just for you. Happy birthday!
April 18, 2008
I'd tell you that I'm busy, but you
know that. I'd tell you that I love Backstreet and I miss "Sucker,"
but you know that, too. What's new? A tornado brought me a storm
puppy, which I wish I could keep; Donald Trump and Trace Adkins are on my
"you will never be forgiven" list; and I cannot figure out what Madonna and
Justin are singing about. Four minutes to save the world from what?
How?
Part 96 of "Sucker" is up, and a "Sucker" short story will be added soon. Good times.
October 29, 2007
Go see Lance on his book tour.
You still have a chance to see him in person, get an autograph, get a hug,
say hi, ask questions, and gaze into those green, green eyes. Dude.
It's like a vortex. I was practically incoherent, and I barely
comprehended what he said back to me, and I wasn't bold enough to ask for a
hug (the fact that he's a celebrity does not make him eager to hug everyone
he meets), but I got a good handshake, and we actually conversed (briefly,
yes, but it counts), and I got an autograph, and I got two pictures, and
Lance is terrific. You should buy and read his book, too, obviously.
It's great, and I tore right through it in one sitting. I learned a
whole lot about Lance and *NSYNC and, dude, the Russian cosmonaut thing is a
must-read.
You know, of course, that you're buying Backstreet's Unbreakable on October 30th, and you're going to watch and record all of their TV appearances, and you're going to see them in person as often as possible.
I've been published again. First there was "Hot Weather" through Samhain. Now there's "A Thief and a Killer" through Alyson Books in Best Gay Love Stories: Summer Flings, available in bookstores near you! Also available through Amazon.
October 26, 2007
Buy Backstreet's Unbreakable on October 30th.
Just had another birthday.
Buy Backstreet's Unbreakable on October 30th.
Here's a descriptive blurb:
There’s more to summer than just hot weather.
Fresh out of college and new to the
working world, John faces reality—spending the rest of his life stuck behind
a desk instead of having fun in the sun with his friends. His boss is on his
back, his car is breaking down, and the oppressive heat is broiling him
alive. There’s no end in sight to his misery.
Tall, slender, green-eyed Keith runs
the lunch shift at the local diner, an air-conditioned oasis away from what
John’s life has become. Keith’s cheerful personality, constant smile and
unbearably sexy body help to remind John that summer is what he makes of it.
And with Keith’s cooperation, John plans on making this his best summer yet.
Excerpts here.
Buy Backstreet's Unbreakable on October 30th.
September 4, 2007
I'm posting here something that I
posted yesterday on my
LiveJournal. You guys are definitely the right audience for it.
(In other news, "Hot Weather," my short story published through Samhain, comes out next month. Excerpts will be up on my other site shortly. And I was in a car accident yesterday. On one hand, I'm fine, no one was hurt, everything's okay. On the other hand, I have to get the car fixed, and even though I have insurance I still have to cover the deductible, my insurance doesn't cover a rental car, there's talk of/need for chiropractors, etc. So while 75% of me is just grateful that everyone's okay, no one's in jail, no one's in the hospital, and insurance should cover the bulk of the expenses, 25% of me is worrying about money, how to manage without a car, and whether I should see a chiropractor or tough it out.)
You are watching "Mission: Manband," aren't you? Why haven't they fired their manager?
Here's the crosspost:
I saw Justin's concert tonight on HBO. (I subscribed to HBO two days ago,
and will cancel my subscription in another few days. If you'd like to see
his concert in reruns, feel free to do the same.)
There's a lot to say about the show,
but almost all of it was shoved aside by The Return of the Wet Knees.
Those of you who've seen *NSYNC's
Madison Square Garden concert will remember that at one point, Justin walked
onstage with wet knees. Speculation abounded among fans, and the most common
conclusion was that Justin has extraordinarily sweaty knees. Diamond opposed
that theory, because her baby does not have freaky sweaty knees, and
since I bow down to Diamond's authority as a Justinologist, I was like,
okay, so it's not sweat, it's just water, or something.
And then, years later, as seen on TV
tonight, Justin walked onstage with wet knees.
My theories, bad as they may be, are:
1.) We know (because Joey told us
years ago, and Justin confirmed it in the post-concert footage just tonight)
that Justin wears short, fitted pants under his performance clothes.
(Diamond mentioned Speedos/bike shorts, but Justin himself indicated that
it's just long-legged underwear.) If he's sweating during the show, maybe
the sweat drains out at his knees, where those shorts end. Although that
doesn't necessarily explain why the sweat stains stop on either side of his
knee at the seam of his pants. And don't the backs of his knees sweat? It
should show there, since he bends his legs a lot when he dances.
2.) Justin likes to kneel down and
give head backstage. Either that creates sweat stains, or he kneels in
water.
3.) By some crazy coincidence,
there's a faulty, loose hose backstage at Madison Square Garden, that
sprayed Justin across the knees that one time years ago and then - - oops! -
- did it again when he returned for this show.
4.) The rumor and speculation among
fans the first time around amused Justin, so he did it again, on purpose, to
drive us nuts.
August 13, 2007
My general thoughts about "Mission:
Manband" are already public,
and I don't want to regurgitate that here. I will say that I love
having a public, televised, crossover event.
I used to get a thrill out of thinking of boy bands interacting, but then I would tell myself no, no, their lives don't overlap like that, they're not that concerned with each other, that's just media hype, that's just a fan wish. Apparently it's a mistake to underestimate the interaction you get when you're all under the same management, however, since AJ stole Rich's girlfriend, and Rich stole her from Chris. (Note to the universe: If you need a volunteer to be passed around among members of *NSYNC and Backstreet, choose me next time. Thanks.)
I'm still wondering why Rich (Cronin from LFO) would think that the 98 guys are snobs. The only partial clue would be Nick's ego, but it's not that bad, seriously, and that doesn't make him a snob.
July 25, 2007
Thanks, technology, for making me
panic. I just opened the folder that holds, you know, the entire
contents of this site...and it was empty. Zero objects to display.
Freaked me out. I closed everything, restarted the computer, tried
again...and, yes, thank you thank you thank you, everything was there.
If you need me, I'll be over here, sighing with relief. Because, dude. The entire site.
This would be why people recommend things like backing up your files?
Anyway, I just wanted to drop by to tell you that this Sunday is the anniversary of "Living," and that I plan to update "Sucker" on Monday, if all goes well.
(No, I don't actually mark "anniversary of 'Living'" on my calendar each year. But it does coincide with Diamond's birthday, which makes it easy to remember.)
June 25, 2007
Drew and Joey on tour together?
Y'all know that you need to see "Dancing with the Stars" on tour. How
often do we get a member of *NSYNC, a member of 98 Degrees, and a member of
the New Kids on tour together? Dancing together? Singing
together? You know you want it.
June 11, 2007
If you love Justin, watch the new
"True Hollywood Story" on the Mickey Mouse Club.
If you love JC, don't bother.
If you love Tony, watch it, tape it, and eat it with a spoon.
May 28, 2007
Yes, I love "Happily Never After."
You knew that I would.
I'm working on a short story that has to be finished and submitted by Friday, but it's begun to irritate me, so I'm posting S90 instead. After being away for weeks, I took time yesterday to attend a birthday party, so, yeah, I'm kind of behind in my writing. Then again, I'm always behind in my writing, so my definition of "behind" may need to change.
It was a fun party, though.
May 25, 2007
I'm back! I'll post S90 soon.
I LOVE BACKSTREET! I hope that Apolo Ohno's "Dancing with Joey" win
has taught us all something about the importance of voting. (Keep that
in mind next time there's an election near you.) And I'm sure that I
don't need to remind anyone that Justin's in Shrek 3.
April 28, 2007
S89 is up now, chock full of sucking
goodness. I'll try to get S90 to you when I get back at the end of
May. Fingers crossed. Feedback is always welcome, and I'd love
to hear from you, although since I'll be away for a month, posting to the
Mattpanel might
be more fun for you.
April 26, 2007
I love "Sucker." I really do.
I've finally had a chance to work on it, and I'm having the time of
my life over here. It's crazy-making fun, delving back into this world
again. Kevin is so hard-core and completely unapologetic about it; he
doesn't give a fuck what you think. Nick and Joey have Ashley jumping
through hoops even though he knows there's a rough landing on the other
side. AJ's snapping his fingers and making people jump. Jacob's
as much of a pompous, hypocritical ass as ever. I love it.
I really do plan to be able to post something before I leave town. (I'll be away for the bulk of May.) I'll try to post something after I get back, too.
Writing "In This Land" has me totally spoiled; it's all peace and light over there, all love and colors and rainbows. Like a slow-motion, spiritual orgy. Vade loves Bade, Bade loves Orinakin, Orinakin loves Selorin, Selorin loves Anosanim, Anosanim loves Talin, Talin loves Hitari... Kudorin loves everyone. Rini loves everyone, too, just in a more, um, physical way. Rini offers sex like he's offering a chocolate bar.
Now, it's true that sometimes "Sucker" is all about love and shiny colors, too. Especially when you're in Brian's head. Then again, Brian's insane.
There is, I will inform you, real and true love in "Sucker." Maybe where you suspect it is; maybe in less expected places. But it's there. And I can't wait to show it to you. (So frustrating to wait for the plot to catch up!)
Since we're all here talking about boys, I might as well say that Joey's totally going to win "Dancing with the Stars." It'll come down to him versus Apolo, who's definitely his biggest threat, but Joey can do it. Dude, with JC on your side, you can totally rule the world. (Hey, it works for Justin.)
April 7, 2007
I checked the Drewboard, and there
was a new reader there talking about "Sucker," and immediately my brain just
clicked on and I was right back in it, thinking about the guys and the game
and who's with whom and who's going to end up doing what, and it was like,
yes, this is it, this is what makes me feel alive. She brought up a
comparison of Brian as the mind and AJ as the body - - Brian uses his brain
to get to your brain, but AJ uses his body to get to your body. We've
seen that, over and over again, Brian saying things to Chris, to Justin, to
Ashley, versus AJ and Justin's physical connection, and AJ and Joey's sexual
connection, and whatever that was that AJ did to Dan.
Anyway, I want you to know that I want to be writing "Sucker," I'd love to be writing "Sucker." I'm going to be away for three weeks in May, so I'm spending April getting everything out of the way, and then I'll spend June catching back up from my absence. If I ever clear some space, if I ever get caught up, I'll work on "Sucker." I have some Brian/Jacob scenes to write, and some Erik scenes to rewrite. The funny thing is, the last time I sat down to write "Sucker," the guys were so impatient to move the plot forward after having sat still for so long, they were rushing everything! AJ just started telling all of Lance's secrets. I was like, whoa, whoa, wait, hold it, back up, it isn't time for that! These guys are chomping at the bit.
I've heard from two separate and entirely reputable sources that, when you go to see Justin Timberlake in concert, before the show starts, they play Nine Inch Nails' "Closer." Just a little "Living"/reality crossover.
February 24, 2007
I've had "Sucker" part 88 ready for a
while now, but I've been clinging to it like crazy because I don't have
anything after that finished. I have some scenes written, but since I
write them out of order, I can't post S89 or anything after that until I
finish up the entire 24-hour period and thread all of the storylines
together.
I really want to give you S88 (and the entire rest of the series), but I have so many other demands on my time, I can never get to "Sucker." And I hate that, because that's not fair to you, and I hate authors who leave a series hanging, but I keep turning into that person. We become that which we mock.
So I'll give you S88 now, because you deserve it, and I'll find time somewhere to work on S89 and the rest of it, and someday you'll forgive me.
January 8, 2007
It's 2007 and we're on part 85 of
"Sucker." I won't say that "Sucker" is slow, but it's intricate.
Also, I haven't posted weekly for a while now, which makes it seem like
things are moving plot-wise much more slowly than they actually are.
The plot isn't as slow as the molasses-style posting makes it seem.
I want to say thanks to Sasja and send good thoughts to Elizabeth K and congratulate Diamond and say okay, Brenhamella, I've posted that part I promised you. Oh, and I want to thank Steph, who's been really helpful and incredibly supportive.
January 1, 2007
Okay, I have way too much going on. Everything's too segmented - - two sites, two update lists, a MySpace page, a discussion group, the Drewboard - - I need one simple, central location where I can catch everything. I'm trying to write two series, write short stories, post here and talk there and chat and this and that and dude, there's just a lot.
So, I've opened a LiveJournal account. It won't replace Mattbrain or the Chatterbox - - I'll still use those places to post site-related blurbs - - but it will cover slash, original fiction, "Sucker," "In This Land," and me, my progress, my thoughts, my whatever-comes-up.
Also, I'm going to be available, off and on, back and forth, on Yahoo! IM as matthewhaldemantime. While it's up and running, I'll probably be busy writing, so I may not have time to say more than "hi." When I say "writing," I mean "typing with one hand and caressing my Brian pictures with the other." So you can see why I won't have a lot of time for lengthy discussions. But I'd still like to exchange greetings. (Join me in my attempt to interact with the world and still make a stab at getting some writing done.)
December 30, 2006
January 2nd is the Literary Nymphs chat. I've hosted my own chats before, but this isn't my crowd of my folks on my turf, so I'm not sure what to expect. I checked out some old messages from the old Literary Nymphs chats, and I talked to Steph, who's extremely cool and is another one of the authors starring in the upcoming chat, about how long excerpts should be, what sort of content to include, etc.
Sex-related excerpts are good, although you don't want to go all-out - - it's one of those situations where you want people to buy the cow so you don't give the milk away for free. So I have to flip through "In This Land" and the related short stories to decide which snippets to offer. "In This Land," though, takes place in a world of its own, so I have to be careful to give excerpts that don't depend on knowing five years' worth of back story and set-up. (For comparison, think about giving an excerpt of "Living" versus one from "Sucker." If you were dropped mid-scene into "Sucker," you'd be like, who are these people and why are they acting like this, whereas if you were dropped into "Living," you'd be like, aw, how cute, they can't stay out of each others' pants.)
The saving grace is that most sexual situations speak for themselves. You're flirting, you're aroused, you're on each other, it's not that hard to follow.
I'd like to give out prizes during the chat. What sorts of prizes, you ask? Free subscriptions to "In This Land." Show up, and you may be one of the lucky winners. Then you, too, will know what I'm rambling about when I start talking about Bade and Kudorin and Orinakin and Extra.
Actually, I can't talk about them much, if at all. I'm really hindered and boxed in by it, because there's a lot to discuss. But it's not really fair to the paying subscribers if I sit here and chatter about, for instance, which of the suitors is going home first, and why, and who might be next. Also, I don't want to give things away, because that might ruin some of the fun for people who haven't signed up yet - - where's the suspense in reading if you already know what happens?
Sigh.
Anyway, if you want to learn more about my original fiction, or about "In This Land," or about Stephanie Vaughan and Jet Mykles and Michael Barnette, join us for the chat on Tuesday.
December 17, 2006
I must give thanks, for you are excellent friends and readers, and I appreciate your help. Yes, I now have a copy of Justin's Victoria's Secret performances. He sings! He dances! His in-ear monitors are bright, bright red!
I also caught Justin's SNL performance last night. It was, of course, terrific, because Justin has been touched by the hand of God in ways that we can only imagine. The very first commercial informed us all that Alpha Dog premieres this January. Honestly, it's taken so many years, I'd given up all hope and resigned myself to the fact that it would never see the light of day - - even Edison Force made it onto DVD - - but now, it shall hit the big screen in only a few weeks. So, a huge round of applaud for Justin and his continued prosperity.
Thank you again for helping me out with the whole Victoria's Secret thing. At this point, it's just embarrassing to mention that I completely missed Drew's appearance on Tyra's show. Apparently, I need not only a more enlightened local CBS station, I also need a better reminder system.
I almost missed SNL, too; I was busy wrapping gifts for needy children. Literally. It's like I'm a good and generous person or something.
December 10, 2006
I know that you're all aching and
itching to know more about my original fiction, especially "In This Land."
Well, in only a few weeks, your questions will be answered!
On January 2nd, from 9-11 pm (Eastern Standard Time, which makes it 8-10 pm for me and probably 3-4 am for you) (and you know, I grew up in EST, but every TV commercial said that upcoming shows aired at "eight, seven central," so whenever I hear anything from EST I have to translate it in my head like, "Okay, if eight means seven central, then two means one," like I haven't lived here for years now and still haven't figured this out) I'll be one of the proud authors featured on a Literary Nymphs e-mail chat. (E-mail, yes, not chatroom, so don't show up in the chatroom, because you'll be utterly alone. E-mail makes it easier to keep people on-topic and leaves a record for people who couldn't make it during the official chat time. Also, it's easier to read chunks of fiction that way.) I'll be there with Stephanie Vaughan (who's been terrific to me), Jet Mykles, and Michael Barnette. We'll answer questions, post excerpts, and give away prizes.
So, go and join Literary Nymphs (literarynymphschat), and then come and hang out with us on January 2nd.
This chat is for authors and readers of original gay erotica, original m/m fiction, not slash. I'd love to host "Sucker" chats sometime next year, if at all possible. There's also the Mattpanel, and at what point did I lose my mind and completely miss the fact that there's no link to the Mattpanel anywhere on this site? Let's go correct that oversight, shall we? (Mattpanel explanation here; actual group here.)
December 5, 2006
Please help.
Tonight on CBS, Justin hosts the Victoria's Secret fashion show. He'll perform and everything.
What is CBS showing in my area? Not tall women in their underwear, no, that's unacceptable! Instead, we get, "Exploring the changing economy, with a look at the increase in knowledge-based jobs and advice on what parents can do to prepare their children for these positions."
Will you please tape Justin for me? I'll pay for the postage and the tape.
Justin will not bring sexy back to Arkansas tonight. Apparently, we'd prefer that he put it right back where he found it, and then wash his hands.
Edited to add: Thank you! I love you guys! You're the best.
December 3, 2006
The Kendig debate continues!
Brenhamella says that Kendig is a city.
Vanessa says that it's a city in
Luxembourg
ElizabethK clarifies her stance by
claiming that Kendig is a city on the border of Germany and the Netherlands.
Megan agrees that Kendig is a city.
(She also shares with us the information that Kendig is also the city in
"Loving Blind." I knew that I'd used it before, but I didn't know
where. See why I love you guys?)
Vanessa checked back in to say that
Kendig might also be in Estonia, Latvia, or maybe Denmark.
Sammymc agrees that Kendig is a city.
Her primary argument is that you talk about going to London and reminisce
about your time in Paris, more so than England and France. Also, if
it's where awards shows are held, it's an important enough location to be
mentioned without the country attached. Like Los Angeles or New York
City. She adds, "I always figured it was in a mid-European or
east-European country. For some reason I picture a place like Germany or
someplace like that."
Let's tally our votes! (I'm not counting my own vote.) Liz and Diamond say country. ElizabethK, Brenhamella, Vanessa, Megan, and Sammymc say city.
A city in which country? Luxembourg? Germany? The Netherlands? Denmark? Maybe we'll never know.
Abrupt subject change number one:
I don't want to make this an out-and-out promise, but I plan, I hope, I would like, to update "Sucker" regularly beginning in January. Maybe on Mondays. Fridays are "In This Land" days, and when I used to update on Mondays there were some positive responses about having something to look forward to at the beginning of each week.
Abrupt subject change number two:
DON'T PANIC! (Shaky breath.) Just, just, here, hold my hands, take my hands. (Several deep, calming breaths.) It'll be all right, it'll be okay. I had all of my Backstreet CD's in a box. Not their normal residence, but things were going on, and I collected them all in there together. Not Never Gone, no, not those, but...the rest. Yes, yes, all of them! (Pause; shaky breaths.) The box is missing. It's gone, and I can't find it. It has to be in the house, it has to be in here somewhere, it never could have left the premises. I'll find it, it must be somewhere in here. It's just that I've looked everywhere, I had help, we searched the house, and I can't find it. And you know, you know, how many CD's were in there, and how precious they are to me, and how sacred they are in my heart. And I don't know how this happened, and I don't know where they are, and I'm sure that as soon as I find them I'll feel stupid for ever having doubted in the first place. It's just... They're Backstreet. Not just one CD, not a couple, not a few. All of them.
The house isn't that big, people. WHERE ARE THEY?!
December 2, 2006
ElizabethK says that Kendig is a city, too. Ha! Take that! A city in which European country, I have no idea. But it's a city.
I hope that it's a city we don't visit in "Sucker." That would taint things. They're about to take trips to Vegas and, later, London, but we may have to leave Kendig off of their itinerary.
December 1, 2006
Diamond thinks that Kendig is a
country, too. Apparently, since I said that it's a place in Europe,
the human brain naturally interprets that to mean one of the sub-sections of
Europe, meaning, a country. So, Diamond says country; I say city; we
both agree that it's a place that we'd love to visit. Wouldn't you
love to take a trip to Kendig? I'd have to stay in that hotel.
There's a strange substance on my favorite shirt. It looks like white paint, only I haven't been near white paint in a very long time. It's my favorite shirt! Now I need a new shirt. White paint? I'm baffled!
November 30, 2006
These headphones are broken. Why would I say such a negative thing? Because they either give me no sound whatsoever, extremely faint sound, or background only with vocal tracks from a very long tunnel. The loss of my headphones saddens me, because they've been with me for several years now, and they have a very nice long cord. Long cords are special.
Liz asked me where I got the name Kendig. (Is that a city or a country? I thought that it was a city, but she thinks that it's a country. Did I ever make the distinction? Do you remember?) Kendig, as a place, predates "Living" - - I used it years before I ever sent the Boys there. I used to get proper nouns for my fiction from my classmates' names, and I remember using "Jostens" a few times; Jostens is the company that makes class rings. (Mine has a red stone. Class of '97.) But Kendig, I just made up out of nowhere. I believe that I used to use it for last names, and as a random city/town name.
If you'd like to save the world, feel free to begin here. Right-clicking to light a candle and make someone else donate a dollar is great, and all, but we can do a lot more to fight AIDS than that.
Someone asked me recently if I had a blog, and I really had no idea what to say. Do I have a blog? I have Mattbrain. I have the Chatterbox. I kind of have a MySpace page, and kind of don't. I have a fantastic - - no, seriously, awesome - - idea for a LiveJournal account that I cannot wait to open. (Look for it in 2007, if we're all lucky.) But do I really have a blog? Technically, if a blog is a weblog, where one writes down thoughts/feelings/ideas/opinions/nonsense, then, yes. I have two. Do I have an account with a formally recognized blogspace, then, yes, I have one. But that's not really mine, that's Rini's. And Mattbrain and the Chatterbox aren't really blogs, they're just places where I talk to you guys when there's something that I want to communicate.
I'm trying really hard right now not to ramble about my plans for 2007. It's going to be awesome. And now I'm writing and deleting chatter about the upcoming parts of "Sucker" and the truths that someone will reveal. Catch the next few updates. Good stuff ahead. (One of the revelations, I've known about since the beginning. The other one, I was like, WHAT?!)
November 25, 2006
Well, I've hit a wall with the "Wannabes." Something happens in the next deleted scene that won't occur in "Sucker" until a future part, and I can't post the "Wannabe" until I've posted that part, so, no more deleted scenes for you until then.
What is this nasty smear across my monitor, and why won't it come off?
I'll try to get a "Sucker" update to you next Sunday. The last time I had a chance to work on "Sucker," I got a lot accomplished, but I also hit some major scenes that need a lot of revisions, so I don't have as much ready to post as I'd like. Still, I should be able to put up something.
November 23, 2006
Passing this along: As World AIDS
Day approaches (Dec. 1), we are reminded that millions of people need our
help with the AIDS pandemic, but we often think, "What can I do?"
Here is one simple way you can help,
and it costs you nothing but a moment and a mouse click.
Bristol Myers Squibb will donate $1
for every person who goes to their web site and lights a candle to fight
AIDS, up to a max of $100,000 (chump change for them, but we'll take it). At
this point, the counter is just over 61,000... so we need many more candles
lit.
Please go to this link to light a
candle... and help spread the light. https://www.
November 21, 2006
I really want to thank you guys, because you've been incredibly supportive. People have told me that they're not really into fantasy, or they're not into gay erotica beyond slash, but they took the plunge and read "In This Land" anyway, and they really, truly enjoy it. It means a lot to me that you have enough faith to give my original fiction a chance. I know how easy it is to get locked into one genre - - in slash, it's easy to get locked into one pairing - - but thank you for believing in me enough to step out of that box and try something new.
I've decided, since there's so much back-and-forth between my readers here and my readers on the other site, to post some more of my original fiction here. There's a lot more of it over at the other site - - more recent stories - - but I thought, why not put some of it here? They're both my sites, and there's no reason why they can't share. Click here for what I've added to this site, and here for the full story listing.
November 19, 2006
My new mailing address is:
Matthew Haldeman-Time
P.O. Box 166718
Little Rock, AR 72206
November 14, 2006
Is "House of Carters" about to be over? Are they almost finished? I'm not ready! They're not ready!
An excellent person e-mailed me with a terrific idea for my other site, and she mentioned Nano. I was like, what's Nano? She was like, "National Novel Writing Month." There's a website and everything. Apparently, November is the month where everyone sits down and writes a novel. 50,000 words. Out of curiosity, I checked, and that would be, roughly, five parts of early "Sucker," or five parts of early "Living." I've been writing a novel a month for years now, and just didn't know it.
November 9, 2006
I have to thank all of you who've subscribed to "In This Land." I know that I've thanked you before, but I have to do it again. It really means a lot to me that you enjoy the series, that you believe in me, and that you support my dream. This Saturday, Sweet Uncleanness will be six years old, and over the years I've had a lot of readers show a lot of love. Thank you. Your support means everything to me. You've given me the courage and the strength to believe in myself and to strive for what used to be impossible goals. Thank you.
Every subscription helps, and I truly appreciate everyone who signs up.
And! I almost forgot! Happy birthday to Nick Lachey.
November 5, 2006
Dude, she called me Anomatthew. And then she called me "son of Alanohi." I've never been called the son of a god before, and I've never been included in one of my worlds like that, and you, ma'am, are awesome. (http://www.myspace.com/inthisland)
It's feedback like that, hearing everyone's enthusiasm for "In This Land," that really makes me believe that this project really will work. And it totally can. If all of my readers sign up, I'll be well on my way to writing full-time.
The subscription service is going really well, and I'm getting more and more traffic. Even with the increase in visitors, obviously everyone isn't signing up. I'm curious about what's keeping readers from subscribing to "In This Land." If you have questions or concerns that I can help you with, e-mail me and let me know. (matthew@matthewtime.com)
I've opened up a new Drewboard forum for "In This Land." You can post feedback there, comments, questions, anything. Talk about your favorite character or gush over Diamond's graphics.
I want to thank the people who've offered donations, because you're wonderfully generous and your support has been amazing.
And, dude? Subscribing twice? The hotness.
November 1, 2006
Looking for something to read?
The home page for "In This Land" is here.
The introduction is here.
The series begins here.
The free short story is here.
If you subscribe, you'll get another short story right away and the next installment of the series on Friday.
Also, Rini's MySpace page is here.
A terrific place to start is actually right here.
October 31, 2006
Tomorrow's the big launch! You guys ready? I'm nervous. November 1st came awfully quickly this year.
Have you checked out the preliminary material? Click the banner above or go to http://www.matthewhaldemantime.com/inthisland.html.
I'm trying to get everything ready. Formatting, double-checking, re-reading.
Do me a favor and go to the Chatterbox. I said some things in today's post that I want to say here, but I don't want to repeat myself.
I was talking to someone today, and I realized that "In This Land" is a good companion to "Sucker." There isn't enough love in "Sucker," there isn't enough happiness and brightness - - it's somewhere you want to visit, not somewhere you want to live. I mean, I love "Sucker," and I'm looking forward to having the time to write more of it once "In This Land" goes well, but I miss good, happy love. You know that I'm romantic; you've read "Living." "In This Land" gives me the chance to explore love again, and I'm really excited about that.
October 28, 2006
I'm being tested. Last night,
my Internet connection decided to shun me. This morning, it worked
briefly, but now it's out again. I'm not sure when I'll actually get
to share this post.
Nice, that this is happening just in time for the promotion of the upcoming launch.
I shall persevere.
October 26, 2006
For those of you who have questions about "In This Land," check in with the Chatterbox over at matthewhaldemantime.com for more updates. Since that's the site where "In This Land" will live, that's where I'll talk more about it.
Thanks for all of your support! You guys are terrific.
Remind me to tell you about my plan for "Deal or No Deal." (It's not slash-related, it's just further proof of my genius.)
October 25, 2006
I'm twenty-eight now, and this site turns six next month. Six years. Dude.
I went to Nick Lachey's concert on Saturday. For weeks (months) I'd thought that the show was in St. Louis, but the night beforehand I looked up directions on-line and figured out, hey, it's in Nashville. Which, for those of you who don't know, is in a different state and, in fact, a different direction. It was a bit of a struggle to get the time off from work, but, hey, I'm not going to miss a concert.
Nick Lachey is, of course, still hot. He still breathes to the left and he kicks out with his right foot a lot. Still a strong singer. He stripped down to a tank top, briefly - - far, far too briefly - - and yes, he looked fantastic. His smile still gets to me, in some weird crush-you'll-never-get-over way. He went into the audience to sing a song about "I'll be your slave/I'll be your master" to a fan. He also had a predetermined group of girls come onstage to stand in a box together. I was waiting for Lance to come out and hand them money.
I've been busy working overtime at that whole job thing and trying to get ready to launch "In This Land" on the other site. Diamond's arranging layouts and establishing the whole payment system, and I'm writing. The better all of that goes, the better things will go on this site, as well, so wish me luck! Or, even better, subscribe to "In This Land" and enjoy yourself.
October 16, 2006
I'm going update "Sucker" soon, really. I started to prep for it last week, and then got all turned around by, you know, life, reality, etc.
It's weird - - writing "Sucker," I have to deal with the fact that the characters' mindsets and opinions aren't my own. I try to be mature about Erik's homophobia (and hypocrisy), but it's weird to write some of his thoughts and perceptions. Not solely because I disagree with them (which I do), but also because it's a sensitive issue for me.
The new series on the other site (http://www.matthewhaldemantime.com) will be called "In This Land." It's about eight brothers. They get laid, they fall in love, they hang out, they meet cute guys, it's all good stuff. And it just now occurred to me that if there are eight brothers, and each one of them has a major hook-up, that's sixteen characters, which is one more than "Sucker" and two more than "Living." Wow. Is that a coincidence, or is my subconscious out to get me?
October 11, 2006
And, I'm back.
I managed to snatch a half-hour of TV on Monday, and I saw NickTV. It was both awesome and terrific. Tons of beautiful Nick. I love this show's soundtrack, because they play Backstreet songs, and all of a sudden "Larger Than Life" started up, and, dude, that song rocks and energizes me. Also, they totally totally totally showed AJ and Howie, which WOW. Brian was a blur in the corner and I loved him. AJ's hair is all thick and curly, and who doesn't love Howie? There was great Nick/Aaron interaction, good brotherly stuff, including the touching I missed in the first episode. Nick gives good advice; I totally wouldn't have invited Wes back over to talk to BJ, but it turned out to be completely the right thing to do, and I'm super proud of Nick.
I was worried that the whole series would be as chaotic as the first episode, but my fear was unfounded. This series rocks. I love Nick. And Aaron. Come on, seriously, you didn't want to touch his hair? Really? Watch it again.
I'm going to see the other Nick in concert later, but other than that, I shouldn't go anywhere else for a while.
The AIDS walk is coming up this weekend, so give the cause (and Lance) some support.
Okay, so here's the thing. My life has become a battle of sorts, a tug-of-war between my job and my writing. Obviously I require a job, because I need a source of income, but it sucks up all of my time. My time is writing time, which is your time - - the time that my job takes away from me is the time that I'd rather use writing slash, writing "Sucker," writing "Slices," writing fiction, writing novels, writing anything. I need a way to be able to write and get paid at the same time.
This is where it gets tricky. I don't want to get paid for what I write here. I don't believe in selling slash. I won't do it. Which leaves the other site, matthewhaldemantime.com. I had a plan to write and sell novels, and I'd love to do more of that, but if you know me, then you know that my thing is serials. Think "Living." Think "Sucker." That's what I love, to create a world and immerse myself in it, to start with a cast of characters and then get to know them, explore their lives, examine their relationships, make them fall in and out of love five times, and then add a new character and see what happens. There's nothing I enjoy writing more than all-male, all-gay soap operas.
I'm going to start one, at over matthewhaldemantime.com. If you'd like to share in the fun and read along, there will be a monthly fee of $1.99. For under two dollars a month, you get to read my new saga. I'll tell you more about it as the launch date closes in. Check this page and the Chatterbox (matthewhaldemantime.com/chatterbox.html) for more.
When this goes well, I'll be able to leave my job and write full-time. Which means more fiction over there, more slash over here, more novels, more "Sucker," more "Slices," more writing everywhere. I would love to write full-time; it's been my constant dream. I would love to flood both sites with fiction, to give you something new to read every day. I have terrific ideas for new stories, tons of them, I just haven't had the time. I haven't had enough time to write for too many years now. I need to do this. With your help and generosity, it'll happen.
You guys don't even know how much this will mean to me.
October 4, 2006
I'm packing up to go, and I'll be gone until the middle of next week. I'd hoped to give you another "Sucker" installment, but I'll put it up when I get back. Keep watching NickTV, and cross your fingers in hopes that I'll be able to catch it this Monday. ("House of Carters" on E!, each episode debuts on Monday but repeats throughout the week, watch it and love Nick forever. Also, it's okay if you want to stare at Aaron's often-naked body, because he's eighteen now, and if he's going to be half-undressed all of the time, we can look sometimes.)
On Sunday, E! debuted the first half hour of Monday's hour-long first episode, apparently as a teaser. I discovered just before the show aired on Sunday evening that E! had black streaks and lines across it, and that was unacceptable because nothing may interfere with a clear view of the glory that is Nick Carter, so the cable company was called. Monday morning, a repairman came out to the house, and he said that my TV was the only one with this problem. It was only happening to two channels, one of which was E!, it began on the night before Nick's big debut, and it was only happening to me. It's kind of hard not to take these things personally. Fortunately, the power of Backstreet prevailed, because after the repairman fiddled around with things and visited his truck numerous times, E! magically healed itself. The repairman said that he didn't fix it, which can mean only one thing: yes, the strength of my love for Nick and Backstreet really can heal the world.
The funny thing is that another shipment of Off the Record has been ordered, and it'll arrive, once again, while I'm out of town.
Everyone sing birthday songs to Kevin, whom we all love, and support, and miss, very, very much. I want to put up some Kevin banners, but I'm running out of space around here! (Does anyone else totally see glimpses of Kevin "Big Guns" Richardson when Nick argues with Aaron?) (We've decided to call him Kevin "Big Guns" Richardson because K-Rich makes me nauseous. Also, the man's arms are huge.)
Oh, would someone please whack me over the head if, when I get back, I don't manage to shift around my e-mail accounts so that new banners actually get to me?
Now I'm sitting here playing with Kevin banners, and I don't have time for this! Good-bye!
Must go now, to pack and such, but when I get return, I'll let you all know what's up with my latest big project. When it goes well (not if, when), it'll mean more "Sucker" and more slash for you, so, good times.
September 27, 2006
I've been compiling a "Sucker" soundtrack for ages now, and haven't managed to post it yet. Megan and Tara, however, are on top of things, and they've - - what can I call it? - - remixed a song. Take Backstreet's "Don't Want You Back" and edit it, "Sucker"-style, and here you go: "Just Want You Back," written by Tara, Megan, and Max Martin, performed by *NSYNC on the "Sucker" soundtrack.
Just, just want you back
You hit me faster than a shark attack
You saw my picture on No Strings Attached, all right
And you were more than just a pretty face
But how you fooled me, I'm still amazed babe
But I should have known that I would be
Another victim of your sexuality
But now we're done and over with
Just, just want you back
Just want you back
Though you're no good for me, I know
That's all I can say
Just want you back
Forgive my honesty but you gotta know
I just want you back
You started going out with so-called friends
But I was blind and so I lost all common sense
But there were things that made me realize, realize
Like all the hundred no,
thousand lies
Just want you back
Though you're no good for me, I know
That's all I can say
Just want you back
Forgive my honesty but you gotta know
I just want you back
Baby, don't bother telling me your reasons why
Just let us sing this story 'bout you and I
Just want you back
That's all I know (just want you back, just want you back)
All I can say
Just want you back
You know I love you so...
Just want you back
Though you're no good for me, I know
That's all I can say
Just want you back
Forgive my honesty but you gotta know
I just want you back
Just want you back
That's all I know (just want you back, just want you back)
All I can say
Just want you back
You know I love you so...
Just want you back
September 25, 2006
First thing this morning before work, I watched the first episode of "House of Carters." I'm going to have to watch it many more times. Too much to take in; too much to process. See it yourself at eonline.com.
(As I requested before, please don't talk to me about the show.)
September 22, 2006
I have returned.
Does anyone know what happened to the
back of Justin Timberlake's head? There's a tiny white patch where hair
doesn't grow. It's noticeable in MTV's "Most Ultimate Moments" and his
recent TRL visit when he's looking out the window.
"House of Carters" premieres on
Monday, October 2nd. The first episode will be
available on-line this Monday and all next week. There's
Carter footage up now, interviews and a brief house tour and such; go to
eonline.com, click on "The Vine," and when that window opens click on "House
of Carters." You'll see Nick being all big brotherly. (I love
seeing him be the grown, mature one.) You'll also see Aaron being a
surprisingly efficient dog trainer, and you'll hear about him licking
popcorn bags. After you watch the clips, let me know whether you think
Nick's biting Aaron or kissing him; I can't tell.
To make this Monday even more special, JC's first single will debut on AOL's
First Listen.
Because I'm uninformed like that, I
had no idea that Long Way Round existed, until I accidentally
stumbled across it a few weeks ago. So I've rented the first disc, which has
the first three episodes, and now I'm watching Ewan McGregor and Charley
Boorman ride motorcycles around the world. I'm in the middle of the third
episode, so we're somewhere in Kazakhstan, and Ewan keeps doing and saying
things that only make me admire him more, like when he gets all humble and
wonders why he'd really thought that it was okay to get bikes for free, when
most people on reality shows, from what I've seen, would've been throwing a
temper tantrum or panicking and not even questioning the validity of the
demand in the first place. Twice now he's had petrol sprayed into his eyes -
- the first time, I was only saved from utter fear because I knew that he'd
be okay, but the second time, I was like, yes, I'm concerned for you, but
didn't you learn after the first time? After the first time you did
something and then risked complete blindness, wouldn't you not put yourself
in that position again?
Anyway, although the show's
completely unmastered and in desperate need of subtitles, Ewan's excellent
as always, and I got to see his butt and his smiles and his pretty blue
eyes, so, good times.
Although Logo isn't available in my
area, the cable people do let you view certain episodes of certain shows, I
guess to make you want what you can't have. So I've seen "Noah's Arc" and
"The U.S. of Ant" and "Can't Get a Date" and "Laughing Matters." I like the
channel's overall attitude, and I like the positive energy, and I like the
Subaru commercials. (I'd like even more to see them on other channels.)
"Noah's Arc" doesn't have the same quality of production, writing, and
acting that "QAF" had (that being the most obvious comparison), but the lead
actor is really nice to stare at, so there's always that.
When are we going to see a male on
"America's Next Top Model?" Why does it always have to be women? Are men not
trying out, or are they trying out yet just not good enough, or are they not
allowed to compete, or what? I would love to see a guy in there. Someone
round up some aspiring male models for next season.
I'm here now, but on October 4th I'm
off to a different undisclosed location; I'll be back sometime the following
week, which means that while I'm gone I'll have to find a way to get an
uninterrupted block of time with a TV to catch the second episode of "House
of Carters," because there's no way that I'm going to miss that. Then, once
I come home from trip #2, I'm going off again to see Nick Lachey's concert.
Just call me a travelin' fool, yo.
September 8, 2006
More context for yesterday's post:
As it turns out, Justin held a VMA after-party at the Roseland Ballroom on the 31st, where he had a club show and invited JC to perform. Go Justin!
September 7, 2006
From August 31, in New York City's Roseland Ballroom, there's a video of JC performing "Until Yesterday." You can catch several versions of it on YouTube; Diamond says that AngelQ's is the best. JC does typical JC moves, and he's wearing tight pants, and there are a bunch of details that you just have to watch it to see. The sound is terrible, so don't watch it for the music; watch it for JC/Justin, because Justin's playing and singing back-up. Yes, seriously. At the end, JC bows to him, and they hug. JC/Justin 2006, baby! Yeah!
September 6, 2006
Dan and Jeff love me. The concert has been postponed. It's unfortunate for them, which I regret, but as one man's bad thing is another man's good thing (wow, that saying has completely slipped my mind), I'm excited that I'll have a chance to see their show. I am confident that the rescheduled date will fall during a time when I'll be in the state.
I'm working overtime hours again, and I'll be away for a week, so my in-box is a bit crowded. Sorry about that. I'll try to wade through it when I get back.
September 2, 2006
You know that I love the guys. I'm all about them. It makes me really protective and oversensitive.
We're about to see Nick on TV on a weekly basis. That makes me nervous, because I love Nick and (in a freaked-out, overeager, I can't believe that this is happening kind of way) I'm looking forward to seeing "House of Carters," but I don't necessarily want the rest of the world to see it. Because we've seen reality TV, we know how it goes, and I don't want people to start talking about Nick without going through me first because I don't know what they're going to say, and I don't trust them to say the right things.
I'm going to watch every episode, I'm going to tape every episode, and I'm going to memorize every episode. And I'll probably do plenty of excited chattering about it.
But I'm not going to read reviews. I'm not going to check for commentary. I plan to censor and limit whatever Nick-related input reaches my brain, because whenever I read/hear one stray comment, it rotates around in my brain and I pick over it obsessively and I drive myself nuts. It's not healthy. So, to cut that behavior off before it starts, I'm going to ask you for a favor.
If you want to twitter and chatter and discuss "House of Carters," please do it, but be careful how you do it around me. If you want to say, "Man, I saw last night's show, and Nick is hot! I love Nick! Aaron's cool! Did you see those pants Nick had on? Did you see his expression? Isn't he The Best Thing Ever?!" then yes, go ahead, please feel free to share it with me. But anything that's not flat-out 100% positive will be censored. I'm going to let you know right now that I'll delete e-mail, I'll delete Drewboard comments, and I'll delete Mattpanel posts. I love Nick, and that makes me very protective, and I'm not going to spend emotional energy scrubbing things clean after dirty fingerprints have been left all over by people mishandling someone I love.
Really, you have the entire Internet to talk about whatever you want to talk about. And you're still free to talk to me. Yes, I'm asking for you to come to me when you're positive and upbeat, and not when you're cynical and rude, but that's pretty basic, anyway.
Let's be honest. Everything that comes out of my mouth isn't 100% flattering. There are a few things that I've said in public that I wish that I could take back, things that I regret; about 95% of the less-than-absolutely-flattering thoughts that run through my head are voiced only in specific and private circumstances to specific and trusted people. Yes, on occasion, on this site, I've tied Justin Timberlake up and whipped him. But that isn't The Real Justin Timberlake, that's "Sucker" Justin (also, if it offends people, then they're free not to read those stories). This is The Real Nick Carter under discussion, and no one comes into my world (my e-mail, my board, my panel) dropping snide comments. It's about respect.
I'm saying all of this now, and I'm not soft-pedaling it, because I want to be clear. I'd rather injure feelings now than have anyone be confused and hurt later.
I don't have the most delicate little feelings in all of the world. But I do have the right to determine the content of my own message board, especially since I pay for it. I wouldn't let you walk into my house and snicker negatively over any of the guys. At a few concerts, I've had to stop myself from losing it and punching people out. I've had to roll down on Diamond over a comment about Jeff. I don't take negative remarks lightly.
If you think that I take things too seriously, that's fine. Just understand that, yeah, I do take things seriously, and keep that in mind when you talk to me.
August 30, 2006
Yes, I will see Nick Lachey in concert this October, but I don't have tickets to see Justin Timberlake's current tour. Nick's coming much closer than Justin is, so I can get to him. I did see Justin several times on his last tour (when he headlined with Christina), and since I assume that he'll have a major tour after his album release, I look forward to getting to see him then.
Someone else just e-mailed me and admitted to living in Arkansas. Cool. See, Arkansas is a hip, happenin' place, y'all.
You really should go see Jeff and Dan. (A simple way to get tickets is to go to ticketmaster.com and search for "Barton Coliseum," which is the venue. It's the September 9th show with PM Dawn.) You guys aren't doing anything interesting that day, anyway, so why not show up and cheer wildly and make Jeff feel good about himself?
If you go, please make my day and e-mail me about it. You can give me a detailed run-down of your entire experience, or just say, "I went." I just want to know that someone was there to rock out and represent.
August 26, 2006
Because I already wasn't upset enough, the universe decided to betray me once again. You know how Dan's coming to Arkansas (also known as The Least-Visited State in the Lower 48, which may not be 100% true but does have the benefit of a nice kind of rhyme to it) on the day that I leave for parts unspecified (because I haven't decided to tell y'all where I'm going, although it's oddly tempting because I know that some of you live around there)? Well, guess who else is going to be at The Concert That Thwarted Matthew? That's right, Jeff. Jeff Timmons.
Please excuse me while I go and throw a wild fit.
JEFF! Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff. JEFF. Did I not
just spend, oh, five years of my life writing an ode to Jeff? (Okay,
it was technically more of an ode to Drew, but Jeff was in there, too.)
I love Jeff. When's the last time that Jeff came to Arkansas?
Now, I do consider myself very, very fortunate to have seen 98 in concert
back in 2001, and I realize that many other people did not have that same
terrific experience, so I don't discount that. But now Jeff's coming
to Arkansas! On the day that I'm leaving the state!
I'm going to miss Jeff and Dan! Dan and Jeff!
Seriously, you guys have to go for me. You have to go and support them and cheer for them and then hunt them down and tell them how much I love them. Get an autograph. (For yourself, sure, whatever, but get one for me, too.) It's Dan and it's Jeff! I really, really do love Jeff and I think that his album's great and I can't believe that I'm going to miss this!
I don't know what I've done to deserve this. Other than, you know, create this site.
August 25, 2006
MTV. Music television. Ah, the irony.
I saw Justin's half-hour interview with John Norris. John asked him about Janet, about Britney, about half-a-dozen other things. Oh, and music. Then MTV directed me to visit their web content for more of the interview. When I went on-line, MTV offered me more clips, and, guess what? They were about music. About Justin's album. Imagine, an artist discussing his music, in more than surface terms, in an actual interview. But MTV was right not to air it; that sort of thing wouldn't belong on a music television channel.
(I shall be strong and only mention, but not discuss further, the bad setting, the horrible shots and weird camera angles, and the fact that John seemed strangely amateurish and in over his head - - strange because he's been doing this for a long time now, and Justin's hardly a difficult interview.)
In other news, it turns out that there's a novel by E.M. Forster called Maurice that was censored or hidden or something for a number of years. (Please forgive my utter lack of details.) I've read Forster's work before, although apparently not with any kind of context, because I thought that he was a woman. Anyway, I've never read the book, because I didn't know that it existed, but the other day someone showed me the movie. (Made in the eighties, it stars James Wilby and Hugh Grant and a bunch of other people like Ben Kingsley.) According to the special features (and I'd recommend that if you see the film, you watch the deleted scenes, because they really add a lot), the movie's different enough from the book that I think that I might prefer the movie overall. Although, not having read the book, I can't be sure. (It's taken years of maturation to be able to suggest that I'd prefer a movie to a book; I was so committed to the idea that all books are better than their movie adaptations, I wrote a twenty-five page paper on the subject in college.)
Anyway, the movie's set in Edwardian England, around 1910 and after, and a middle-class guy (Maurice) meets an upper-class guy (Clive) in college, and Clive says, "I love you," and Maurice says, "That's rubbish," and then a scene or so later Maurice is in love with Clive right back, and then Maurice tries to get some but Clive says that they should remain platonic. So they spend a few years being in love but just being friends, and there's back-and-forth tension, and then one of their old friends is arrested and jailed for trying to pick up a guy, with weird lines about corrupting one's inferiors.
The first half of the movie's slow, and it gave me plenty of time to start dreading the ending. Because hello, let's face it, if you watch a movie about gay people, someone's going to end up dead, or at least horribly alone. So we started taking bets on whether Maurice or Clive would be the corpse.
Clive (after, according to the deleted scenes, climbing into bed with Maurice and then climbing right back out again, because he wanted me to loathe his character), goes off to Greece, then comes back and breaks up with Maurice and gets married to a woman. Maurice pays them a visit.
Enter Alec.
Alec was in a much earlier scene, and the second I saw him I knew that he'd play a major role in the plot later, because intelligent directors don't pay that much attention to someone we're never going to see again. Alec is Clive's under gamekeeper, and he has a crush on Maurice. He seduces Maurice, and they go back and forth about things, and Alec's supposed to leave for Argentina but he stays, and Maurice officially dumps Clive for good and is in love with Alec and we're all happy and fade to black.
A happy ending. A happy ending! Maurice was brave, he found love, he overcame incredible and pervasive homophobia, he overcame class issues, he pushed for his own personal fulfillment and satisfaction and wouldn't settle for less - - the whole ending was perfect. He totally ditched Clive, who kept trying to convince him that homosexuality is wrong and, if ever acknowledged at all, should be confined to a pure and platonic friendship.
I was thrilled.
Now I have to decide whether or not to read the book. I think that I'd like to, out of curiosity, even if it doesn't give me the same satisfaction as the movie.
It was a romance. The main characters didn't have to die off, or be separated, or end up miserable and alone, or be outed and humiliated. They were brave enough to acknowledge what they needed and go after what they wanted. Hooray!
And I have no idea how to play cricket.
Edited to add:
I'm not saying that Maurice is the greatest film of all time. But how many movies about gay men have you seen where: a.) one of them dies b.) one of them is attacked/humiliated c.) they don't end up together d.) their actual sex lives are hinted at/suggested but not really explored (you never see them in the same bed, naked, on top of each other)?
Two final comments:
1.) Apparently, "Maurice" is pronounced "Morris" in Edwardian England.
2.) Now that I've finally found a gay drama with a happy, romantic ending, let's find more. If anyone has any recommendations, go ahead and post them on the Drewboard for all to see. (Recommendations regarding lesbian movies are welcome. And bisexual movies. And transgender movies.) http://p090.ezboard.com/bmattslash
August 21, 2006
I love my gay cosmonaut.
Okay, how stupid is this? I used to live in Pennsylvania. All tours go to Pennsylvania. All artists play in Pennsylvania. All over Pennsylvania, and in nearby states; if you live in Pennsylvania, you have the immediate hook-up.
I moved to Arkansas. No one comes to Arkansas. When I go to concerts, I drive out of state, usually about eight hours.
Dan is coming to Arkansas. Dan Miller. The best part is, Dan isn't exactly, for example, Justin Timberlake, so you can assume that if I tried really hard, I could maybe find a way to run into him.
The stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid part? I'm going to be out of state. I'm never out of state, but the day Dan's performing, I'm going to be elsewhere. And I can't reschedule.
I'm going to miss Dan! He's coming and I won't be here!
STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID!
If anyone sees him, tell him that I love him and it pains me to miss him.
I love me some Dan.
August 15, 2006
Oh! Oh! Real-life "Sucker" moment! Diamond's been posting her Lance/AIDS Walk banner (scroll down) on various MySpace blogs. (It's working; even people who'd already seen Lance's original post have donated money specifically after seeing her banner. Post it! Everywhere!) She's posted on everyone's blog, particularly those belonging to boy band members, from Brian Littrell to Jordan Knight. She's especially targeted Justin's, because of its high traffic, although she can't post on JC's because his doesn't allow HTML. She's posted several times on Jacob's, and each time, it's been deleted. Jacob's Loc deletes posts encouraging support of Lance in the AIDS Walk. Why does Jacob hate the Basstronaut?
banner by Brenhamella
Now, I wouldn't want to, you know, harass Jacob or anything. But if you guys wanted to go and post Diamond's banner on various places around the Net including Jacob's blog, well, I wouldn't stop you. (If you do, please don't be rude. Be polite. Friendly, even.)
The banner and accompanying HTML are below. Jacob's MySpace account is at myspace.com/jacobsloc.
Jacob has the right to host whatever content he chooses on his own site. I don't even know who officially runs the blog or deletes posts. But I think that it would be terrible if Jacob didn't get a chance to see how much we all love Lance and respect Lance's support of a worthy cause.
Edited to add:
You would think that, because it's an AIDS walk, of all things, Jacob would have no problem with it. However, this is the same person who gave the following interview:
When asked if they would have joined Lance on his dream trip to the International Space Station (ISS), Jacob replied, "No way. I wouldn't go because Lance isn't cool and I like hanging out with cool people.
"Just look at him. The hair, the clothes, it's a package deal.
"I've met him and you wouldn't want to hang out with him. There's no way I'd go to the moon with him."
Lack perspective, much? That's what makes me wonder if the posts are being deleted because:
a.) they're generally off-topic, since that never happens on MySpace
b.) they're for an AIDS walk, and Jacob doesn't prefer to encourage support of disease education/eradication
c.) Jacob hates Lance
Maybe a combination of the above? Maybe Jacob (or whoever's deleting posts) simply doesn't understand the posts. Maybe someone should make more of them, with cheery explanations.
August 14, 2006
Looks like I totally missed Ashley's birthday. Oops. And I just put up some Howie banners, early.
I have about, oh, 15 e-mail addresses, most of them forwarded from one account to another. Certain addresses I check more than others, and some I think are dead but turn out not to be. I just checked an old account, and realized that messages I thought were forwarded to account A were forwarded to account B, so I'd never seen them. My apologies to those of you who were lost in the shuffle. It's like someone's been calling me all year but the ringer was off and I never knew.
I'm trying to sort things out now, but a whole lot's been lost, and I may be on the verge of closing certain accounts. Your best bet is to write to matthew@matthewtime.com.
I said, "I've met Brian," and all of a sudden everyone clamored for details. And I respect that, because yes, it's huge, because it's Brian. And we all know that BRIAN is the center of the universe, the pinnacle, the summit and sum of all things. He is the boy band member above all boy band members and no other boy band members shall come before him, though I love them dearly.
I'll try to address some of the questions y'all have posed. Because, as Vanessa expressed it, "You can't meet Brian and just let it be that. It's Brian. Littrell, no less. Not just any old Brian. Pixie. Our Pixie. Nick's Pixie."
He had on jeans and a green Doors T-shirt. He had a goatee (light scruff above the lip, below the lip, and on the chin) and gorgeous, gorgeous sideburns. His eyes were blue and he had sexy biceps. He sounded country. He looked amazing. He mentioned that he met his wife 4 days before shooting the video for "Backstreet's Back." I have pictures of him, not with him. He was there with Tim Miller and (to my surprise) no relatives.
(Tim Miller is the sound guy you've seen a hundred times in *NSYNC tour footage. He does not know that he's a celebrity and doesn't know how to react when approached by fans, or so I've learned. He says that he's, "With Brian now," whatever that may mean. I'd love to be, "With Brian now," myself.)
And now, on to Lance news. Lance is participating in LA's AIDS Walk this October, and he's asked for sponsors. You get to support Lance and raise money for AIDS at the same time! What could be better? Click on the banner below and toss in a few dollars.
Banner, of course, by Diamond. You're welcome to borrow it. Please use the following code:
August 11, 2006
Did you guys see Travis Pastrana's double back flip? Dude.
Have to admit, I like Gene Simmons' kids.
Elizabeth K. brought Justin's recent radio interview to my attention, including the great line, "The best singer out of all of us is JC." (Were truer words ever spoken?) Pictures here: power106.fm/photoalbum/justint.aspx.
Apparently, at some point (Sunday night?) I managed to cut my tongue in my sleep. I've been told that the tongue is the fastest-healing organ in the body, but my tongue hurt all week. Like, Monday through Thursday. Today it's significantly better; I was beginning to despair, because it didn't seem to be getting any better at all. But, a healthy tongue is a happy tongue, and it's much better, so it's time to celebrate.
Hmm. Just thought of a Drewsome slice.
August 10, 2006
In case Sarah S. is out there anywhere: Thanks once again for the software you sent! I'm still using it. It's been an invaluable resource.
See above for a new banner from new bannerist, chole. Welcome to the oh-so-elite group of Sweet Uncleanness bannerists! Cupcakes and punch are on the table.
Because you've all just clamored for more information, I'm rooting for Kayne in this season of "Project Runway." He caught my attention in the first episode. I also like Michael a lot. Malan just about broke my heart. I think that (Matthew does research to find out her name) Laura does really good work, but it tends to look the same, which makes me doubt her true creativity/versatility.
August 9, 2006
Wow, okay, I didn't know this. The Backstreet Mastercard isn't a credit card, it's a pre-loaded pay-as-you-go card. You can get one for anywhere from $10 to $250. You can get it for yourself, or buy one for a friend. Hot! I mean, I'd prefer a Backstreet Mastercard, but this is great, too. (I wonder if I can get several.) backstreet.myplash.com
Lorna passed along this link: without-me.livejournal.com/1146902.html If you want to send Lance flowers, as a show of love and support, now you may be able to do just that.
Three shows I've checked out lately: ESPN's "The Contender" (season 2), because I really liked the first season (from NBC). Discovery's "Cash Cab," because it's just fun. Bravo's "Project Runway," because it's totally normal for me to take three years to pay attention to something everyone else has been into the whole time. All of this is a bad sign for my constant struggle to break away from reality TV.
August 8, 2006
HAPPY 30TH BIRTHDAY, JC AND DREW!
(Also, a quick shout-out to Nick, because in Mattworld, when "Living" Drew and "Sucker" JC get together, guess what they have in common?)
The following post was written July 18th:
Darren Hayes is out. I couldn't be more thrilled. It is a fabulous,
fantastic, and wonderful thing when someone can openly be exactly who he is.
It is absolutely insane for anyone to have to wait thirty-four years to be
able to say in public, "Hey, I'm in love with this guy over here." Not only
is Darren out, he's also married, and everyone here at SU extends a loud,
hearty congratulations.
(In case you have no idea what I'm
talking about, Darren Hayes is the singer from Savage Garden. Go buy CD's.)
Diamond introduced me to Boyzone, and
I got all "whee!" and "ha!" and giddy. I keep forgetting what their actual
names are, so I refer to them as Ronan, Stephen, Shane, Patrick, and
Patrick. (They all have, oh, four or five or six or ten names apiece, like
Ronan Patrick Shane Nicholas Michael Ronan Keating, and several of them have
"Patrick" as a middle name, although I don't remember which ones.) I'm a big
fan of Ronan's voice, and I'm intrigued by the slash potential of Ronan and
Stephen's dynamic. (Something's up with Stephen. There's always something
going on behind his smiles. Not as innocent as he looks, that guy.) Boyzone
doesn't hit all of the "boy band" marks that Five does, but they still get
credit.
For years now (and I mean that
literally), various people have tried to hook me on Westlife. I've always
resisted valiantly, but after I fell for Boyzone, Diamond handed me Westlife.
I named them West, Life, Christmas, Bobby, and Other. (Christmas is my
number one favorite, but I'm also a big fan of Life.) (I named "Bobby" after
Bobby Brown. I'm also a New Edition fan. I love young Ralph Tresvant's
Michael Jackson impression, Johnny Gill's teeth, and Michael Bivins.)
Westlife, too, is missing some of the necessary "boy band" traits, but
they're still good, clean fun. And, dude. Do not look directly at Christmas,
or you'll be sucked in for life. Whenever he looks right into the camera,
I'm just slayed.
Oh, wow. His name is Nicky. Because
life is like that.
The gay one is (pause while Matthew
does research) Life. And his real name is Mark. And now I need large posters
of Mark and/or Westlife to put beside large posters of Darren Hayes so that
I can celebrate people who refuse to deny who they are in the face of (at
least in some places) complete insanity and discrimination.
The Federal Marriage Amendment was
defeated, and that's a great, great thing. It's also something that never
should have been up for a vote. (Although we're also having public debate on
things like evolution and global warming, if that tells you anything.)
(Deep breath. Mustn't lose mind.)
Anyway, as of tonight, I love Hanson.
(Yes, I'm a bit late.) As long as we're talking about boy bands, Youngstown
was way overlooked back in the day. Those guys have some great songs,
compared to what else is out there. Give them a listen. One of the guys from
No Authority gives a memorable live show; one performance and I was like,
dude, get me more of this. There's also, of course, LFO. And Plus One.
Speaking of Christian music, guess
who I saw over the weekend? I'll give you a hint:
PIXIE!
OH MY #($&*@#(*$&*# I LOVE
BRIAN LITTRELL.
I've been calling a certain
song/video "Everybody," but Brian calls it "Backstreet's Back," so as of
this weekend, that's what I call it, too.
I was THISCLOSE to Brian once last
summer, and all I remember about the moment is how amazingly beautiful he
was and how blue his eyes were. Then I was close enough to touch him (his
hand) and, wow, I've touched Brian Littrell. This weekend, I got a
signature, and I MADE HIM HOWL. No, literally, he howled because of me. (He
also brought up his wife, which is a sign I choose not to interpret.) Later,
when someone called his name and he looked up, he looked straight at me and
made eye contact and smiled. I realize that announcing that makes me sound
young and silly, but I don't really care, because Brian Littrell looked
right at me and made eye contact and smiled, and not much else matters.
The meet and greet was at Borders.
How's that for irony?
The concert was a multi-act
anniversary concert for a Houston radio station, KSBJ. (Yes, KSBJ. I don't
know why a Christian station would want to name itself after a blowjob, but
that's up to them. Isn't it? How does that work, anyway?) We drove down (in
a rental car from a company I shall never patronize again, not to mention we
got lost, and we got only an hour and a half of sleep, and I got a speeding
ticket that I consider to be a personal injustice), and since after the meet
and greet we kind of needed a little more rest, we took a nap before the
concert. We missed the first few acts, and got there in time for Sonic
Flood. I think that I like Sonic Flood. Kind of fun.
Okay, yes, it was a Christian
concert, so I should've been on my best behavior, but the guy beside me was
TAUNTING me, and I wanted to hit him, so I got kind of rude.
But then it was time for BRIAN, and
nothing else mattered.
The guy who announced him basically
apologized for his Boyness and made it seem like, "Yeah, I know he's in
Backstreet, but he's not that bad, really, so give him a chance," which I
understand in theory, but still rubbed me the wrong way. He didn't sing "In
Christ Alone," which surprised me. He sang "Angels and Heroes," "Gone
without Good-bye," "We Lift You Up," "My Answer Is You," and "Welcome Home."
He was totally himself; he talked about God and other good things, but he
also acted silly and made pixie noises and tossed in Backstreet references.
There were a bunch of true fans there (mainly in the back), and they
responded really well; it took the Christ crowd a minute, but they got into
it, too, which was great.
He did a Backstreet medley, too,
which surprised me. I hadn't expected that at all. I think it's fantastic
that he did it - - he sang, "I Want It That Way," "As Long As You Love Me,"
and something else. (Wow, I should really know what that was. Maybe "Quit
Playing Games?") I love that Brian can be one way without sacrificing the
other sides of himself. He can be Christian and pop; he can celebrate God
and be a Backstreet Boy at the same time.
That's what I love about the Boys.
That they ARE the Boys. It's not something to be ashamed of, something that
they used to do, or do for money, or do on the side. Howie loves his
Streethood. Brian displays his Streetness. They're other things, too; they
have other interests and other traits. But they don't have to throw their
Boyness out of the window for it.
I love Brian. I love Backstreet.
Also loving Darren Hayes and Westlife
Mark. (Hold on.) Mark Feehily. Oh, like I'm going to remember that.
Edited to add: I was paging through
Westlife's official site, and according to Nicky, "What the other guys say
about me: I'm the longest in the shower." I'll leave the interpretation up
to you.
Okay, old post over, back to new stuff:
I've been bad bad bad, because I didn't appreciate how huge Mark's coming out was when it happened, and I apologize. It's enormous and I'm thrilled. It's also hugely amazing that Darren and Lance are out. I'm strongly, strongly against outing someone who isn't ready to be out, but I think it's fantastic when people do come out. I look forward to the day that coming out isn't a huge event and doesn't change anything, and in order to make being gay less of an event in and of itself, more gay people have to be more out and visible. Then everyone will know so many gay people that running across another one will be a non-event, just like running across someone black or Jewish or anything else is/should be.
I need to find more time in the day so I can cram some minutes together and put up tribute pages. For Lance, Mark, Darren, and, well, once I get started, it'll be hard to know where to stop.
July 27, 2006
I had a post all written and ready, from last week, about Darren Hayes coming out, about Westlife, about Boyzone, about how much I love Brian, about a bunch of other things. And then LANCE CAME OUT.
I've spent the past 24 hours saying, "Lance is out," at random intervals. I can't hold coherent conversations because while the other person speaks, my brain wanders over to Lance. Because LANCE CAME OUT.
I'm thrilled. I'm happy for him. Dance, dance, dance. Lance is happy, he sounds great, and it's a wonderful, wonderful thing that his public coming out is a positive thing for him.
I checked out his Myspace page, and he's getting a lot of happy, supportive reactions. That's fantastic.
Hooray for Lance!
WOO-HOO!
It seems like I should have a lot to say here, but what else is there to say? I love Lance. Lance is amazing.
(If you're looking for a hot Lance fix, I'd recommend the Atlantis concert. Also, in non-Lance news, the Backstreet Mastercard is available, so go get one.)
Edited to add: Thank you to everyone who e-mailed me to let me know. I appreciate you guys for thinking of me. Thanks for the heads-up.
July 22, 2006
Edited to add: regarding Kevin articles, not Lance articles.
I wrote a post a day or two ago, that I'll put up in a minute. But first I want to bring up the following points:
It would be great if, when you report on someone, you'd get his age correct. Even if you're going by the information given to you in a press release, don't you have fact checkers?
It would also be great if, when you report on album sales, you'd provide accurate numbers. The last number I heard for Backstreet, before Never Gone, was 75 million. Providing anything under that is not only inaccurate, it's insulting, and it suggests that only U.S. sales matter, which is, at best, stupid.
I forget the exact word used - - something like "tepid" - - but let's get real. Debuting in the top ten - - sorry, in the top five - - of the Billboard charts is a great release, especially in the current culture of illegal downloading.
(Gritting teeth together to keep rude comments from pouring forth.)
Edited to add: Justin's Edison is now out on DVD as Edison Force. (If you look up Justin on imdb.com, there's an ad for it down the right-hand side of the page.) The movie itself is bad, but Justin is, as always, simply terrific, so go and buy it.
July 6, 2006, part one
On the subject of Kevin:
It's hard to know where to start. Of course I love Kevin, and I always will. I won't say that I'm going to miss him, because of course we'll see him again. But I will miss him when I see the other four onstage, in videos, doing interviews, etc. Because for thirteen years, Backstreet has been a unit of five. It's hard to imagine seeing only four. There's a moment during the "Around the World" footage where Brian, AJ, Howie, and Nick are on the plane, singing, and Kevin's not there, and it's like, this is what we have to get used to now. This is the way it's going to be. And that's really hard to accept.
When you look at Backstreet... Howie's not the most imposing figure in the world. Brian's a pixie. But Kevin... He's tall, with pale skin but that black hair and those dark eyebrows and such. A. Good. Body. And Kevin has a lot of the pride and authority and confidence that I see as signature Street. I love how in charge of things he is, how he directs the other guys, how he directs the reporters. Man, don't mess with Kevin. He's never been afraid to speak his mind.
Without Kevin there for balance, physically, Nick's going to look even taller than the other guys. And as far as group dynamics, without Kevin taking the lead, who's going to step forward?
Who's going to stick his head in cold water (first)? (Don't think that's a new habit; check out the 1996 Backstreet Boys: The Video.) Who's going to explain to us what "unplugged" means? Who's going to ask for mouth-to-mouth? Who's going to tell us what a lovely day it is? Who's going to show the crowd his butt in his trademark booty dance? Who's going to talk three times slower than everyone else around him? Who's going to tell us that he doesn't like cheese on his? Who's going to "feels like it's deep within me" with Brian? Who's going to call over Macho Man? Who's going to be utterly, utterly in love with AJ?
Nick won't be able to say, "Don't tell Kevin," anymore, at least not with the same weight behind it.
Kevin and Brian being cousins has to be the second most relayed piece of boy band biographical information, ever. Is it ever going to come up again?
I respect Kevin's decision, because it's his right to live his life as he chooses. He's given us years of music and memories. And if he has to make this choice, then I think that it came at the best time. The five of them, all five, came together for Never Gone. They all wanted to be there, and it showed. Honestly, I've never seen Kevin happier. During all of the Never Gone interviews and appearances and everything, Kevin was smiling in a whole new way. He loves the guys, he loves the group, and he loves AJ. And I'm glad that he got to leave after having that great experience, and after sharing it with us.
Kevin really appreciated his chances. Watch Around the World for the best example of this. Kevin's all over the place. He's talking with everyone, chatting with fans, thanking crew members, flying planes, seeing sights, taking advantage of every opportunity. He really took in every experience he could, and he gave credit to the fans.
No one can ever take Kevin's place. Kevin can't be replaced. His role in the group, onstage and off and in our hearts, is unique to him.
July 6, 2006, part two
I wanted my Kevin post to be all about Kevin, not other people, so here are some notes that didn't make it in, and other assorted thoughts. (The post above covers only a percentage of everything that's been going through my mind; it's hard to get it all out.)
When I look at Blue, I look around in search of the fifth guy. It is not possible that I will ever look at Backstreet and not glance around for Kevin.
ElizabethK told me that her favorite Backstreet Boy will always be Kevin; Kevin will always be a Backstreet Boy. I completely and entirely agree with the sentiment. Once you're a Backstreet Boy, you're one for life.
I love AJ, Brian, Howie, and Nick. You don't know how glad I am that they're in the studio.
Kevin's role as the leader is so cemented, I don't know what they're going to do now. They can't just shove someone else in that spot and keep going. Nick's never had that role. AJ has a strong personality... Howie's the businessman, which makes him a good candidate, but it also means that he has a lot on his plate. He's also too nice and chronically late. (How did I not know that?) I've seen Brian kiss the other guys more than I've seen him tell them what to do.
The number one most relayed piece of boy band biographical information, despite the frequency with which I stride around my personal life quoting certain facts, is the shocking news that Lance is from Mississippi. Lance will inform you of this as often as possible, with no prompting whatsoever. Ask Lance what his favorite color is, what he had for lunch, what kind of socks he's wearing, and each answer will begin with, "Well, I'm from Mississippi, and..." This information is, yes, more vital than Kevin and Brian being cousins from Kentucky. Half of the time I just call him Mississippi Lance.
(Yes, I do stride around my personal life quoting boy band members and their stats. One of my favorites is Justin Timberlake's, "I'm a very spiritual person," perhaps for the utter lack of information it conveys contrasting with the great profundity with which he announced it. Another personal favorite is Chris telling us that JC's doing the same thing he's doing, which would lead one to believe that Chris is, in fact, the songwriter of the group. History teaches us otherwise, although I'll always love "Falling.")
Twice now, I've tried to discuss the restructuring of Backstreet's vocals, and I can't even make my way through it. (Although once, I did manage to insult O-Town halfway through, so that's always good fun.) I'll just shut my mouth and leave it to the professionals.
In other news, because sometimes it's wise to pretend that there's life outside of Backstreet:
Nick Lachey was on the "Today" show on the fifth. See, weeks ago, I checked rockontv.com, trying to see which guys would be on which shows at which times. They managed not to list Lance's game show marathon at all, which is an unforgivable offense. I copied relevant information, dumped it into a notepad file, and checked it periodically. I had a mental note that someone was doing something on July fifth, but I forgot which person/which show/which time. Suddenly, on the morning of the fifth, I was like, oh, hey, wait! So I jumped over to my notepad file, and scrambled for the TV, and turned it on just in time to see Nick Lachey finish up "The Hardest Thing."
See, I understand that "The Hardest Thing" has been one of the biggest hits in Nick's career. But it isn't part of Nick's career; it's part of Jeff's, and Drew's, and Justin's. And I didn't see them up there with him. So immediately, I had mixed feelings - - I was mad that I'd shown up late, and I was happy to see Nick, and I was irritated that he wasn't singing something of his own.
I kept watching, and he never sang again, so I must have missed the whole thing. I'll try to pick up a copy somewhere (I'll ask Diamond to find it and download it for me).
For the record, I don't like it when Justin sings *NSYNC songs, either. "Gone" does not work without the right people behind him. Hired back-up singers are not the right people. I know what *NSYNC sounds like, Justin, and I know exactly where I should hear Lance and JC, and those strangers standing off to one side of the stage sound wrong.
I don't mind when Nick sings Backstreet songs, because a.) he's Nick, therefore I love, and, b.) he still sings those songs with the Backstreet Boys. Magic.
Of course there are logical reasons why Nick Lachey would sing "The Hardest Thing." I understand those reasons. But, on an emotional level, I didn't like it.
Nick Lachey's album is out. JC's is coming out. Justin's is coming out. Backstreet's in the studio. Plenty of reasons to celebrate.
Speaking of Justin, he's in Nelly Furtado's "Promiscuous" video. There are four shots of him at the end. Because he's Justin.
Just so you can appreciate my sacrifice, I'm keeping my mouth shut about: the song's lyrics, my various opinions on trends among producers, and the video's casting. But, all of that aside, I have to ask, why is Justin there? Because he's working with Timbaland? Because he has a new album coming out and it's time to increase visibility? Because he's Justin? There's something magical about Justin.
June 24, 2006
I just found out about Kevin. (backstreetboys.com) Please don't e-mail me about it, because I'm not ready to talk about it just yet. When I am, I'll post some thoughts here.
June 22, 2006
(Aaron Carter is my guilty pleasure.)
I love Howie. Howie is the nicest person I've ever met. And what makes him even nicer is that he doesn't have to be. Other people in his position aren't nearly that nice, aren't that generous, aren't that giving of their time and attention. I love Howie. And he's just absolutely gorgeous. So so so so pretty pretty pretty. The back of his neck is sexy.
You must go visit his latest hotel. And guess where that is, folks? Why, it just happens to be in Cape Canaveral. On Astronaut Boulevard. What would "Sucker" Lance think of that?
I finally bought Nick Lachey's and Ashley's CD's. There are certain similarities; they both cover personal subject matter about relationships we saw on reality TV, and they both have a song titled "Shades of Blue." However, Nick's album is better. Ashley's is over-produced, and too-similar tracks are grouped together. Nick, frankly, is a better singer than Ashley. He also goes more in-depth in his lyrics. Ashley's lyrics skim the surface - - I'm in love with a girl and she's like this, that, and the other. Nick discusses more of what he's going through, with more depth and breadth. Nick's cover art also has better pictures, even if they're a little too reminiscent of Justified. So, buy Nick's album first and Ashley's second.
I love Brian. I love Brian very, very much.
Diamond's trying to widen my horizons by introducing me to more pop music. Back in 2001, she brought O-Town to my attention; a few years ago, she introduced me to Blue. Recently, she made the mistake of offering me Westlife and Boyzone, and now I have a huge and unreasonable Boyzone crush. To distract me from that, she's throwing bands at me - - Atomic Kitten, All Saints, Play, Girls Aloud, S Club 7, and more. (Trust me, there are more.) Most of those are girl bands, which usually aren't my thing, but I'm generous in my old age. Anyway, one of the groups she offered me was Liberty X. First, they're one of the best male-female groups I've heard - - not that I've heard many, but they sing well, which is always good. And, they sing "Divine Intervention."
(I really shouldn't have to tell you this, but "Divine Intervention" is one of the tracks that didn't make Never Gone. And if you don't know what Never Gone is, go find out and then buy yourself 10 copies as penance.)
There are several differences between Liberty X's version of the song and Backstreet's, but my favorite is the emotion. Backstreet sings with feeling. Then again, what do you expect? AJ's been singing with emotion since before 1993. Nick is the emoter. Everything's a song with Brian; he always feels the music. And Howie? Kevin? Dude. I love Backstreet.
I love that Howie loves Backstreet. I love that he owns his Streethood. It's a significant and recognized part of him. And he's the nicest person ever.
Also, check out Lance's Myspace blog. The man needs some serious TLC, and Joey just happens to be in town? Slash, anyone?
June 1, 2006
I decided to update "Sucker." Only I can't find the revised version of S77. I have an older version, but it doesn't have the right changes. So now I'm trying to find the corrected S77. It may be on a jump drive, only the jump drive no longer works correctly. So, when the update will be (today or later) and which version you'll get is, at this point, unknown.
As usual: I love Backstreet, I miss "Sucker" and "Living," and I love computers but they don't always love me back. New development: I'm crushing on Boyzone. More than I should. (My interest in Westlife is picking up, too; I need more material.)
I'll go rummage around and try to find something to post, even if it's poorly written, just because I feel bad for abandoning you guys.
Update: someone terrific helped me to get everything off of the malfunctioning jump drive, but I still can't find the revisions. So I'll have to go back through and revise S77 all over again. In the meantime, I'm putting up some "Wannabes." Please, for the sake of my frazzled nerves, pretend to care.
May 2, 2006
See the date of the previous post? That's when I was going to update the site. Didn't happen until today. Sorry. But! It's time to go buy Brian's new CD. Go! Go! Go!
(If you don't want it yourself, buy it and send it to me.)
April 29, 2006
Hello.
According to Lance, there won't be a Challenge for the Children this year.
While I may not be 100% shocked by the news, it still hurts. I've tossed around the idea of spending the money I would've spent on tickets, hotel, transportation, etc., on charities (probably Brian's and Howie's).
So, no CFTC this year. And no Backstreet shows. (I love Backstreet.) I'm not sure what to do, with nothing to plan for. Is Brian going on tour? I can't imagine an entire 12 months without something, someone, anyone. There was always CFTC at the very least. Is anyone around on tour this year? Good Charlotte? Linkin Park? Simple Plan? Aaron? Nick Lachey? Ashley?
I love Kevin's thumb ring in Brenhamella's banner. And the fact that he only buttoned one button on his shirt. And Brian's knuckles. And, you know, pretty much everything else.
No trips. No concerts. I guess I'll just stay at home and worship at my Backstreet/boy band shrine.
April 17, 2006
How stupid do you feel when you save something onto a floppy disk, and then realize that you have no access to a computer with an A drive?
I've received some e-mail from people asking when I'm going to update "Sucker." It really is terrific and flattering that you guys want to read more of "Sucker," and I wish that I could give you a firm date. If I knew, I'd tell you. I'm not yanking you around for fun. There are some things in progress around here - - when I'm ready to post, I will. In the meantime, thanks for your patience. And try to find me a computer with a floppy drive.
April 14, 2006
Busy weekend. Weddings and Easter and such. Well, one wedding, but, still.
Ashley's cooking show starts Monday night on NBC. This is his third TV show
on his third channel. I wish him much luck. (After point five seconds of
thought, I've decided that, given the choice, I'd like to see AJ on a
cooking show. To paraphrase JC: Because...yum.)
Brian's new album comes out on May 2.
He's already won a Dove award for Inspirational Recorded Song of the Year
for "In Christ Alone." Because he's hot like that.
I'm trying to get a new part of "Sucker" to you, but I'm having trouble putting the scenes in order so the timeline makes sense.
April 10, 2006
You probably know that there are half a dozen ways to spell *NSYNC. 'Nsync, N'Sync, etc. (One of the worst is the one in B5's liner notes, which I don't have with me at the moment. Although it's awesome that B5 gives credit to Backstreet, *NSYNC, and the New Kids.) Anyway, what totally rocks is that Lance spells it the way I do: *NSYNC. Because Lance and I are cool like that.
Been here yet? http://p090.ezboard.com/fmattslashfrm4.showMessage?topicID=128.topic
March 30, 2006
New banners from Miazilla, Glamour, Brenhamella, and Vanessa.
I wrote a few...wait. Which ones are "Posers" and which ones are "Wannabes?" If "Wannabes" are the kind I've already posted, then - - okay, right - - I wrote a set of "Posers." Only I have to find out whether or not they give too much/anything away before I post them, because if they give away things that I'm not ready to reveal about the "Sucker" world, I can't post them yet. So. Let me check around and I'll get back to you.
Wish me luck at work tomorrow. We're having a thing and we're doing some stuff and I've been anxious about it all week. And there have been some changes made here at the household, and I don't like to talk about my personal life here because that's not what this space is for, but what with job changes and household changes and the launch of the new project, things are, well, changing. And changes to my life affect this site, in big and little and good and bad ways.
March 24, 2006
I had this all phrased nicely in my head last night, but I forget how I had it worded, so I'll start from scratch.
You guys have been extremely generous and amazingly supportive. About a lot of things, in a lot of ways. You're a great group of readers and a terrific group of people.
Which is why I'm fairly certain that you won't actually track me down and maim me when I make the following announcement.
I'm taking on a project in real life, and it's going to consume some of my time. (And we all know how much time I have to spare.) As a consequence, you won't get a regular Friday "Sucker" update. You will get updates, you will get new parts, you will get "Wannabes" - - they just won't come on a regular, weekly schedule.
They'll be little surprises. It'll be fun. You won't know when to expect them. Suddenly - - flash! - - there they'll be. Look! A new part of "Sucker! Hooray!
March 17, 2006
I finally decided. "Wannabes" are the deleted/rewritten scenes and "Posers" are the short stories set in the "Sucker" universe. I have ideas for "Posers," but no time to write them; and even if I did have time to write them, it's hard to write them without giving too much away.
Anyway, the first "Wannabe" is up. More to follow. The first one is long; most of them won't be that long. Except for the huge one that I won't be able to post until much much much later, since it gives something away that I really can't expose until the endgame.
ElizabethK gave me a tip that sent me running to Backstreet's site and WOW! A Backstreet Mastercard?! I have to have that! I have to have that!
Man, if Mastercard wants me as a customer, and wants me to use their card for each and every purchase I make, they made the right move.
Thank you, ElizabethK; two huge hugs for you, for passing along that information.
Have you all seen the Howie banner on the boyslash page? The question is, do I like it that much because it's Howie? Because it's "Sucker?" Because of Vanessa's talent? Or just because it's purple? I tell you, once I finally figured out that my favorite color is purple (I used to think that it was yellow, but man, was I wrong), I can't get enough of it. In fact, the room I'm in right now could definitely use a lot more purple. Or maybe just a vacuum cleaner...
March 10, 2006
I asked the Drewboard's fantastic
research assistants what "Sucker" Howie smells like, and I got a variety of
responses. If you want to add your two cents (or in this case, your two
scents), it'd be great to hear from you.
I don't actually have the link with me, so... Hmm. Go to p090.ezboard.com/bmattslash, click on the "Research Assistants" link, and chose the thread at the top with Howie's name in it. That should get you there.
March 5, 2006
Maybe the "Sucker" link on the boyslash page should say that the next update will be "on or after" March 10th, instead of on March 10th, because I keep showing up late.
Drew news: Drew won! Drew won. Drew is the official star and winner of "Dancing with Drew." I read that the show's finale had more viewers than the closing ceremonies of the Olympics. Which sounds significant to me, anyway. Drew won, and he deserved it, and I'd like to thank everyone who voted, and I love Drew.
Apparently, as part of his whole winning thing, Drew's been on every daytime and evening and late night and afternoon talk show in the country. And I've missed every single one. So, hooray for Drew! And sad sigh for me. I either need to find a site to download them all from, or find some generous person who taped them and is willing to send me a copy. (Please?)
Also, according to reports, Drew's brother Nick is working on his second solo album. So, Justin Jeffre's talk a few months ago about how 98 is getting back together, well, um... Either Justin was confused at the time, or else he was badly misinformed, or else they did have plans to hook back up but somehow those plans didn't work out. Which makes me spit and curse.
(I love Backstreet.)
On "Dancing with Drew," Drew said something about how while he was rehearsing his saucy new dances, people were covering for him at work. Work? Drew has a job? This tickles my brain. I have no idea what he's talking about. During his many interviews I missed, did Drew happen to mention what his current occupation is? (It kind of seemed to me like aside from being a star on Broadway, Drew's job was being Nick's brother.)
That train of thought led me back to one of those times when VH1 tried to reunite old bands, and one of the former members of one of the old bands was working in an actual office in an actual cubicle like a normal person. And I would like to kneel down and clasp my hands and give much thanks for the fact that this will not happen to my beloved Boys.
(Although the idea of Backstreet in an office sounds like a fun AU. Nick in a cubicle?)
On to Ashley news... First, last Monday's episode of "The Ashley Parker Angel Show" - - okay, now I'm interrupting myself, but let's get around to discussing the title of Ashley's show. The title "There and Back" snatches me right back to Lord of the Rings, and Ashley's show having that particular title coincides a little too neatly with the recent enormous upswing in the popularity of that franchise. Sean Astin titling his autobiography There and Back: An Actor's Tale was fine with me, because he's Samwise and he's the hero of the trilogy and he can do that. Ashley: not a hobbit. Please rename the show.
Anyway, I hope that you caught the latest episode of "Not a Hobbit," or that you can catch a rerun, because, dude. Trevor. Trevor was there, and Trevor displayed more love, affection, concern, understanding, and acceptance than anyone else on that show has. (Jacob holds second place in that category.) Trevor knows Ashley, and Trevor understands and accepts Ashley, and Trevor cares about Ashley, and I felt the love. Much applause for Trevor.
The show keeps making a big deal of how broke Ashley is, but maybe he's not as broke as they claim, or maybe the construction business pays a little too well, because he went to work with Jacob for one day and never went back because that one day of work covered the rest of his bills for the month. Do I need to start swinging hammers?
I love Jacob, because he and Ashley were working on the site and a few girls came up and recognized him (Jacob, not Ashley) and they were like, you're from O-Town, why are you here? And Jacob admitted that he was there building their new living room. And I know that he was mortified but he handled it very well and I love that he's supporting Ashley when... I don't know, it seems like Jacob's a better friend to Ashley than Ashley is to him. But that could just be the show's editing. Although Jacob's been generous with his time and energy and support, and Ashley tends to say how grateful he is and explain how appreciative he is (because he's Ashley, and talking about his emotional state is what he does) but I don't see him giving a lot back.
For instance, when he went to see Jacob perform (for the first time?) he got into a fight and missed the whole thing. The show didn't explain too well how the fight started, but "The Real World" history tells us that when people see MTV cameras, they act like idiots and pick fights on purpose. So chances are, Ashley couldn't have done much to stop the situation. Although he didn't necessarily react all that well. And then he spent the rest of the night recounting the events of the fight to everyone he'd ever met.
I think my problem is, "Not a Hobbit" doesn't make Ashley come across as 100% wonderful. I'm frustrated with Ashley and with his situation and with many of the people around him. I think that Ashley's situation would be a lot different (obviously) if he were surrounded by different people. But I can't exactly go and kidnap him.
Also, Ashley seems to think that the majority of the trouble with his current career is that he carries the boy band stigma. Now, I won't entirely discount the boy band stigma; it exists. But I don't think that Ashley fully realizes the extent of the O-Town stigma, which in my mind is a lot more of a problem. He does have a really good song, though, which pleases me greatly, and the new producers he's working with seem extremely good at what they do. So, there's always hope. (There is! Shut up.)
If you're watching the show, you should definitely check out the behind-the-scenes stuff and the deleted scenes and everything on-line. I thought that the whole MTV Overdrive thing was a bunch of nonsense, but they actually have good stuff there. I saw more of Erik there than on the actual show. I think that the material there changes from week to week, so you may not be able to get old footage once the new episode airs.
Recap: I love Trevor, I love Jacob, I'm frustrated on Ashley's behalf, I'm pleased about his new producers, Drew could totally kick Ashley's pretty little butt, and I love Backstreet.
Backstreet in an office. You'd have to make Kevin the CEO but Howie would so be running things for him. Lance would be their major competitor. Would I have to put AJ in the mail room? Or right on top of Kevin's desk?
February 26, 2006
Okay, so "Sucker" is two days late this week. I'm sorry, because that's not fair to you guys. I was recruited to help out with a party. The party itself lasted 4 hours, but the pre-party planning, shopping, setting up, etc., was a nonstop event. If it's any consolation, the party was a great success. Everyone had fun. And I was spared from having to de-bone six chickens. So, thumbs up.
I'm looking at Glamour's "Loving Blind" banner just above, and the question arises: why did Howie tuck his shirt in? Maybe because he has the shortest jacket?
I still haven't seen Friday's "Dancing with Drew." (Which, alone, should tell you how busy I've been.) I'm trying to find time to watch it today, before the results are announced tonight. (It's already after 4:00 here, so wish me luck.) No matter what happens tonight, I want to thank everyone who voted for Drew. You guys are the best. If/when I finish my "Dancing with Drew" "Slice of Life," consider it dedicated to you.
The Mattpanel had a great discussion going about the recent scenes in "Sucker" where Kevin whips Justin. I'd been hearing a lot of strong, "negative" reactions - - crying, wanting to throw up, etc. But I wanted to know more; I wanted to know specifically why the scenes made people react that way. So I asked about it, and there were some terrific responses. A lot of different responses from different viewpoints. I want to talk about that here, but what happens in the Mattpanel stays in the Mattpanel. If you want to share your thoughts or join in the conversation, we'd love to hear from you.
February 22, 2006
Today is Wednesday. Tomorrow is Thursday. On Thursday, on ABC, is "Dancing with Drew." That TV show I keep talking about. Tomorrow is the big day, when the last three couples dance, everyone votes, and there's no turning back. The winner will be announced on Sunday, but the voting happens tomorrow. Thursday.
So far, the voting has been popularity-based (which celebrity has the most fans) as opposed to merit-based (which couple actually dances best). Drew and his partner Cheryl dance the best; they always put on a great performance. Drew deserves to win. For Drew to win, we need to vote.
The show airs at eight (seven Central). Call during the show (and up to 30 minutes after, I think). 1-800-868-3405 has been Drew's number. You can call multiple times from as many phones as you can get your hands on. Vote on-line at abc.com using as many e-mail addresses as you want.
Even if you haven't been watching the show, you can tune in tomorrow. Even if you don't watch tomorrow, take a minute to vote anyway. Drew's the most solid performer on the show; he's the best dancer there, and he deserves to win.
And if they're determined to make it a popularity contest, we can do that, too.
banner by Diamond
February 17, 2006
I wanted to talk about several things, but I forget what most of them are. So I'll talk about Edison.
A few years ago, Justin had half-a-dozen movies in the works. Some of them were big news for a while but then disappeared; some of them were made v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y. Alpha Dog is on its way out soon. Edison was made first, but never made it to a theater near you.
A quick step to the side; let me tell you all about my theory on illegal downloading. A lot of people use shareware, etc., for illegal downloading. Movies, music, etc. I don't believe in it. If you can buy it from a store, you should. I won't get into the whole lecture on why, because we all know why. The only things I like to download (or ask someone else to download for me) are things I can't purchase, or already bought a copy of. (Yes, I download things I already own. Well, not anymore, because I haven't downloaded anything in a long time now. But I used to.)
Someone I know downloaded Edison. Since this movie is never legitimately going to see the light of day, I thought, hey, all right, and I watched it.
Justin does a terrific job. Two claps for Justin! We all knew that he'd be a good actor, and he is, and we're all quite, quite proud. Good for you, Justin!
Morgan Freeman's there, and Kevin Spacey. And LL. And Cary Elwes, although it took me an extra second to realize that, hey, that's Cary Elwes! His face has filled out since I last saw him, and that threw me off. (The person I was with pointed out that he sounds a lot like Charlie Sheen.) Dylan McDermott's there, convincingly playing a sociopathic junkie.
I only saw it once, on Sunday, so I'm hazy on a few details. I remember Justin doing a great job, I remember thinking that the acting overall was just fine... I remember hating Justin's girlfriend, but you could've predicted that.
The movie's bad, though. Bad movie. It feels really rushed in some places, like we're skipping over scenes and development, etc.
Okay, have you seen Aaron's movie? Popstar. Pop Star. When you watch that movie, you get the sense that somewhere towards end of shooting/production, the money ran out, and the director had to throw together whatever he had and call it done. So you get un-mastered scenes, missing scenes, etc. Edison is kind of like that, in some ways. You feel like you're missing important scenes, like they're not giving you all of the information you need.
But Justin does a terrific job. He's acting! I can't wait to see Alpha Dog. Although the whole horrible true crime element doesn't really appeal to me, personally. I try to put limits on my negative input and increase my positive input. Justin in a movie, shirtless and talented, positive; the movie's subject matter itself, negative.
I'd recommend that you see Edison (there are English and German versions available). It has Justin, he's acting, hooray. And who doesn't like Kevin Spacey?
February 10, 2006
I have so many terrific new "Sucker" banners that I want to put them all up at once! It's rough, deciding which ones to put on the boyslash page in which order.
"Dancing with Drew" update:
1.) Drew got a perfect score. (He deserved one long before this - - remember the quickstep? - - but at least they finally got around to handing it over.)
2.) They showed Nick coming to see Drew practice. It was Super Bowl Sunday, so they were in a hurry to get out of there. When Cheryl said that Drew was finished for the day, Nick picked up him to carry him out.
3.) Bill Medley (and his daughter) showed up to sing. What's it called, "Time of My Life?" The Dirty Dancing song. Cheryl and Maksim and Maksim's dancers did the actual Dirty Dancing choreography. How cool. (Yes, I recognize that dance on sight. Oh, like you don't?)
4.) Vote for Drew. (Who, despite remarks to the contrary, has wonderful shoulders, a lovely neck, and um... Well, all I really have to say is, eligibility requirement. And should we feel terrible that Cheryl bumped into Drew's nose, or should we be surprised that it took her that long to do it?)
This show is just great. Drew dancing. Drew talking. Drew in the hat. Drew without sleeves. (Cheryl pulled Drew's sleeves off mid-dance! I love it when the guy's the one we're undressing.) Drew kicking butt. Drew being sexy and hot and fun. Drew with Nick around. Of course, now I have "Slices" running around my head. Among my many questions: to what lengths would Nick Carter Littrell Lachey go to make sure that Drew wins?
I have "Slices" in my head, I have a bunch of stories from other fandoms just itching to be written, I'm working on Book #2, and there's always "Sucker." Mmm, "Sucker." I just saw some Grammy footage (from 2002, maybe?) when Backstreet presents an award and *NSYNC performs "Gone." I was like, oh, yeah, that's back story, baby, who knows what happened backstage, at the after-parties...
I love Backstreet.
Here's reason #14,512 why I love Drew. Obviously, Drew's hot. Granted. He's also, apparently, according to "the real world," straight and married. For weeks now, he's been dancing with Cheryl, which involves a lot of touching, intimacy, body parts, etc. They seem to have a great relationship and they hug all of the time. (I mean, all of the time.) But there's no sexual undercurrent there. Zero, none. They hug, they bicker, they dance, they seem close, but not for one second does it seem like Drew sees her in a sexual way. He's the same way with Stacy. (Stacey? How does she spell it?) Okay, so she's two feet taller than he is, but she's pretty and friendly and, you know, perfect, or whatever, and he plays around with her, but there's nothing flirtatious about it. I love that Drew's cool enough, mature enough, secure enough, whatever, that he can be around women without making it a man-woman thing. Hooray for Drew. Apparently, life is not like TV after all, and straight men and women can be friends without wanting each other. Who knew?
February 6, 2006
Wow. It's Christmas all over again! I just got new banners from Vanessa, Brenhamella, turlough, MiaZilla, Glamour, and DS!
There's so much terrific stuff I don't know what to put up first! You guys are in for a treat!
Also, Pretty Hot and Tempting gave me the award for Best Real Person Fan Fiction! For "Living." Hooray! Thank you!
Okay, gotta run.
February 3, 2006
America Online tends to have fairly aggressive advertising campaigns. Often, they send out mass mailings of product samples. (90-day risk-free trial discs, etc.) I do understand their marketing efforts, and it's fine if they want to reach as many customers as possible by mailing everyone a trial CD. However, they don't just send a simple CD. They send a CD in a box. Sometimes thick cardboard, sometimes wood. Either way, it's more heavy than a mere envelope or just a CD. And mailmen have to carry these things.
I appreciate mailmen. They're good people. I really think that AOL should show them some respect and, if it's necessary to mail everyone in America a certain product, it might be easier on the mailmen if they wouldn't mail said product in an unnecessary box.
I got one of those boxes recently. There was a free, twenty-four-hour customer service phone number on the box and on the enclosed CD. I called the phone number and asked to be taken off of their mailing list to give my mailman one less unnecessary box to carry. The AOL representative was more than happy to remove my address from the list. (The woman said that it was "a more than valid request.")
1-888-698-6902
AOL can advertise however it chooses. But I know that I won't use the products they send me, and there's no reason for the postal service to have to deal with it.
Eleven days until Valentine's Day.
Seventeen days until Brian's birthday. Welcome to Pixie Month.
Twenty days until Justin Jeffre's birthday. And Sean Astin's. Speaking of Justin J., I had to sigh a rueful sigh when "Dancing with Drew" showed Drew and Cheryl's "friends and family" dinner and I didn't see even one Degree. Okay, fine, so he has friends and family members who aren't Degrees, whatever, but, seriously, he couldn't rummage up Nick? We've all seen NickTV; we know that Nick would never have a dinner like that without inviting Drew. Nick doesn't walk into the next room of his own house without calling Drew about it. ("Yeah, so I'm in the living room now, and...")
Oh, and I deserve the Bad Fan Award for saying that Kevin and Chris were born in November when I should've said October. (My own birthday is in October, so you'd think that I'd remember these things, but apparently not.) I remembered the 3rd and 17th off of the top of my head, but got the month wrong. Sad.
Drew danced the salsa last night and wow. With Drew in this competition, no one else deserves to win. And now I have all sorts of "Slices" in my head with Drew and Nick and Brian and, especially with that new sexy salsa dance last night, Howie. (Mmm. Howie salsa. Spicy.) Of course there's no way that I could actually slash Drew and Howie in the "Living" universe, because that would be insane and I'm pretty sure that Chris wouldn't like it, but... If Drew had to learn the salsa and Howie danced with him... Maybe I just like to have Nick get territorial. That is his Drew that Howie would be dancing all sexy on.
Here we all thought that my goal in life was to torment Justin Timberlake, and it actually may be to torment Chris. Who knew?
[Matthew writes and deletes too-long paragraph on merchandise, money, and personal issues.]
Speaking of Justin T., it sounds like Alpha Dog will soon appear at a theater near you! Personally, I just want to be a fly on the wall when Diamond's in a theater and first sees an Alpha Dog trailer. Don't worry; you'll hear the screams from where you are. Imagine it: Justin commercials on TV. Sitting in a darkened theater watching shirtless Justin. It'll be a whole new kind of porn.
(Seriously. What happened to Edison? Why is this movie not available?)
There's a lot of great stuff on the Mattpanel. I'm tempted to reply to every post. There's great stuff being said and interesting points being raised and sometimes I just have to laugh, because the Mattpanelists are not only very cool but also pretty funny. And it seems that at least a few of them have noticed my love for Drew. (And here I thought that I was hiding it well...)
Upon request, I just read this Mattbrain entry to someone. It sounded ridiculous out loud. (Forlorn sigh.) I'll post it anyway.
Next time, if I remember, I'll discuss the Drewboard "Sucker" polls. Oh, and, if you're lucky, my ever-so-erudite thoughts on Brokeback.
January 27, 2006
Tomorrow is Nick's birthday. And Joey's birthday. Which brought an odd bit of "Sucker" trivia to my attention. In "Sucker," Nick and Joey are together; they're both born on January 28th. The two other January birthdays are AJ and Justin; they're together. Howie and JC, August. Kevin and Chris, two weeks apart in November. That leaves Brian and Lance, who were born in February and May, but everyone else matches, and I don't know how that happened.
I'm looking forward to Valentine's Day. I walked into a store the other week and saw aisles of Valentine's Day displays, and something about them just hit me. I want to celebrate love.
On Sunday, "Law and Order: Criminal Intent" had Brad Renfro and...(thinking)...Ethan Embry. I fell for Brad Renfro years ago, and I wanted to see what he's been up to, so I taped the show. And, okay, so Chris Noth used to be on the original "L&O" series, right? So his character's been established. And you may know more about him (whatever his character's name is) than I do. But is there any possible reason that his character would mispronounce the word "pattern?" Because, I'm telling you, it came across as a general lack of intelligence on the actor's part. I've seen him on "L&O: CI" before, and his character never struck me as someone who didn't know how to speak correctly. And "pattern" is not a three-syllable word.
It's kind of like on "Angel," when Angel brings Darla back to the hotel and says "supposably." Which is not a word. Of course he meant "supposedly," but do the directors not catch these things? Or is this the best that the actors can do?
It's just... You're putting out a professional product involving many people, viewed by many people. How many people are standing right there on the set when the word's mispronounced? How did it slip right by everyone and make it onto my TV screen?
Of course I make mistakes all the time. In regular life, and on the Net. But my feeble excuse is that I'm pretty much the only one involved with this site's content, my other site's content, my book's content, etc. Any and all mistakes are, ultimately, my fault, and mine alone. Television shows are the work of many, and involve a lot more exposure, a lot more money, etc.
(Sigh. I had to vent to someone, and you were standing right there...)
January 21, 2006
I just saw The Hollow, and yes! Yes, yes, yes! Okay, at first I was kind of quietly avoiding this movie, because I love Nick but I didn’t trust this movie to come correct. But, dude, you have to see it. I love Nick, and he did a great job, and I’m so proud of my baby…
The first half is all about Nick. My favorite is the hallway scene, I love it, but the opening graveyard scene is great, too. (Nick needs to be in a movie where he’s a hardcore villain. Seeing Nick get up in people’s faces and look at them like that… A serious rush.) When he’s in the locker room, getting up and walking away, I swear, I love every inch of that man. And then he’s at fencing practice licking his lips and not giving a d*mn and, wow.
I didn’t realize that he’d be all over this movie. He keeps popping up in scenes that you’d think aren’t even about him. And he’s on horseback. And I need, very badly, to touch his hair. And he does that laugh thing where he giggles. And I love him in this movie. He did a great job.
January 20, 2006
This is a call to action!
I’ll start from the beginning.
There’s an ABC show called “Dancing with the Stars.” Ten celebrities are paired with ten professional dancers; each week, each couple dances on Thursday, and then one couple is voted off on Friday. Half of the votes come from the panel of three judges; half of the votes come from home viewers.
Drew is on this show. Our Drew. Drew Lachey.
There have been three episodes so far. Drew’s the best dancer on the show. HE MUST WIN. Frankly, he deserves to win.
(In last night’s episode, he wore the hat. Backwards. Somewhere, in another universe, Nick and Brian love this show.)
You know that I love Drew. But I can only vote for him so many times by myself. I can’t do it alone!
You can vote once per e-mail address at abc.com. Both the show and the website give you each couple’s phone number; you can phone in repeatedly during the show’s broadcast.
I really do think that anyone who likes Drew should watch the show, because last night’s dance was fantastic. They keep flashing to his brother (and Drew’s very pregnant wife) in the audience. And, of course, Drew in the hat. Drew sleeveless. Drew smiling and dancing and kicking everyone else’s a**.
Vote on-line at abc.com. Phone your votes in. Let Drew know that you love him. I promise you, he’s the best dancer on the show. If he gets sent home because someone else has a bigger fan base… (Curse, grumble, snarl.)
I have no idea how to get people to vote. (If I did, things in this country would be a little different.) What am I going to do, threaten you? (If Drew doesn’t make it to the next round, I’ll stop posting “Sucker.”) Bribe you? (For every week that Drew stays on the show, you get a new “Slice!”) That’s insane. And extremely unattractive. So I’m left with, well, begging. Which is still unattractive. Sigh.
Anyway, I love Drew. And I’m very happy to report that even if I didn’t love Drew, he’d still deserve to win this show, because he’s the best dancer there. And I’m tired of reality TV with unsatisfactory endings. Besides, the more we vote, the more weeks in a row we can turn on the TV and see Drew there. And, man, I love DrewTV.
(Technical note: If you’re busy or prefer to watch “Everybody Hates Chris,” you don’t actually have to watch “Dancing with the Stars” to vote. If you visit the website at abc.com, you can vote there, and they’ll give you the phone numbers to call, which you can call repeatedly throughout the show and even a half hour after the show ends in your time zone.)
January 13, 2006
Brokeback opened here today. I saw it. Now I want a cowboy.
Vanessa, Glamour, and Brenhamella, I have much thanks and feedback for you. I'll try to send it on Monday.
Must have a cowboy. Giddy-up!
January 6, 2006
I want to thank ElizabethK, ElizabethB, and my generous benefactor again. Just because I'm still very grateful.
I also want to thank Liz, for showing support and thinking of me and giving me a heads-up.
ElizabethK and Veronica get the Awesome Award for letting me know about Drew's TV show. Can you imagine the catastrophic horror of me missing Drew on TV? It's Drew! My Drew! I love Drew! I wrote a million-word ode to Drew and called it "Living" and practically built a shrine right here on the Internet!
Anyway, the catastrophe was avoided because ElizabethK and Veronica got to me in time. Much thanks to them. I taped "Dancing with the Stars" last night. I haven't seen it yet. If I'd seen it live I could've voted. A chance to vote for Drew! Dude!
Ashley's show starts on Monday.
Drew on TV. Ashley on TV. Backstreet's back! All right!
Drew. Dancing. On TV. Mmm... I can just imagine Brian and Nick watching that. And thinking things... I have to see this show. Where's my tape?
December 31, 2005
I just changed the birthday page from December to January. Lots of January birthdays. Very important month. Two Boys and two Syncs, in addition to an elf and a hobbit. Dude.
Also, it brings to mind this exchange:
“Do you even know when AJ’s birthday is?”
“January ninth,” JC said.
“1978,” Lance said.
“That was a Monday,” Justin said.
-"Sucker"
Dude. They've done their homework. I don't even know the day of the week when I was born. Come to think of it, I also don't know the time of day or how long the labor was or anything. I mean, I guess that I was there, but I don't remember much about it.
(And to clarify, yes, I did look it up when I wrote that conversation, and yes, AJ really was born on a Monday. I wanted to be accurate.)
And now we switch from 2005 to 2006. As we look back over the last year, two things spring to mind:
1. Backstreet’s back! SCREAM!
2. It’s going to take me another three decades to finish “Sucker,” isn’t it? We just had a whole solid year of sucking, and we barely got anywhere.
In a few weeks, “Sucker” will officially be the longest story on the site, surpassing even “Where You Belong.” Congratulations, “Sucker.” Why is this story this stupidly long?!
It’s my fault, of course. Sigh. My brain came up with, “ooohhh, this could really be an interesting idea, this sounds hot, let’s do this!” and I was like, okay, yeah, cool, let’s go for it. And it’s not like the plot became more complex as I wrote it; it’s just that I didn’t realize when I began how many actual words it would take to write something this complicated. The overall plot of “Sucker” is the same now as it was in the first few pages. But fleshing that kind of idea out, doing it any kind of justice, entails more than just a cursory overview of events. Would any of us care nearly as much or even really be all that interested if it were written like, “So then Howie and JC seduced Erik while Justin spent a lot of time with Dan. They even went shopping together in New York! Meanwhile, Brian and Jacob were becoming really close friends even though Brian didn’t really mean it. Or did he?”
The funny thing is, I started “Sucker” in 2002 when Nick’s solo album, Justin’s solo album, and O-Town’s second album came out. Now, three years later, Backstreet’s back and Ashley’s getting his own TV show.
Anyway, let’s bring the focus back to this ramble. I love you guys, and I’d like to thank you for sticking through 2005 with me. I’d love to see even more of you in 2006.
Backstreet forever!
Edited to add:
I already explained this to the Mattpanel, but there's no reason not to spread the word. You know those short stories called "Slices of Life" that are me playing around in the "Living" universe? I'm going to have those for "Sucker," too. There will be two kinds, "Posers" and "Wannabes." One kind will be actual deleted scenes - - scenes I wrote for the text of "Sucker" that didn't make it in due to editing and rewrites. The other kind will be more like the standard "Slices" you're familiar with now - - short stories set in and around the "Sucker" universe, exploring different aspects of the characters, showing back story, following up on what happens after the story ends, etc.
So: "Slices of Life" are to "Living" as "Posers" and "Wannabes" are to "Sucker." I probably won't write the short stories until eighty-five years from now when "Sucker" is over, but you will get the deleted scenes before that. I already have a few stacked up, waiting. Some I can't give to you now because they give away things that I'm not ready for you to know about yet, but others you're welcome to read if you want. Once I get them posted.
December 23, 2005
First, I must say this: Thank you, very very much, to ElizabethK, ElizabethB, and my anonymous benefactor. You guys are crazy super generous.
Second: Vanessa, Glamour, and Brenhamella, I'll get to your banners any day
now, really. I'm sorry that I haven't gotten back to you yet.
Pointless question of the day: what
if SU had a slogan? What would it be?
Sweet Uncleanness: Harassing
Justin Timberlake since 2000.
Sweet Uncleanness: Fetishizing Nick
Carter since 2000.
Sweet Uncleanness: Privileging Brian
Littrell since 2000.
Sweet Uncleanness: Writing about
second-tier boy bands since 2000.
None of that's quite catchy enough.
You may be interested to know that
Ashley Angel's MTV reality series premieres in January. It's nice of MTV to
keep giving former boy band members their own TV shows. <sarcasm>It's done
wonders for Nick Lachey.</sarcasm>
I need a new chair. This thing
becomes less of a desk chair and more of a recliner every day.
I taped the Radio Music Awards on
Monday. Since none of my people were supposed to be there, I didn't bother
to watch it and intended to tape over it. Then Diamond told me that some of
the Boys showed up to present an award. I found the tape and yes, they were
there. Nick, Brian, and Howie. Hi!
Further proof that Backstreet's back
(all right): when they approached the podium, the fans started screaming.
The fans continued to scream while they were talking. (You can distinctly
hear a "BRIAN!") The only time the crowd got quieter was while the other
person they were presenting with (Kelly Monaco) was talking.
I skipped around the tape to see if
that was typical. It wasn't. For other presenters (and winners!), the crowd
applauded when the people showed up, then shut up while they were talking.
As in, silence. Backstreet got screams, dude. BECAUSE WE ROCK LIKE THAT.
On a personal note, it was weird for
me to see them with Kelly Monaco. I don't expect you to know who she is, but
among other things, she's been on "Port Charles" and "General Hospital,"
both times as characters I absolutely hated.
You know, "Port Charles" was a
spin-off of "GH," and occurred in the same town, with overlapping
characters. The same actress appearing on both shows but as different people
raises questions. Doesn't it seem like someone would bump into her new
character and think that she's the old one? Especially since her "PC"
character was Kevin Collins' daughter? Shouldn't someone in town have a
problem with this? (Didn't she kill Rafe?)
Anyway, back to Backstreet. On
December 10th, I went to Houston to see Backstreet perform in the Jingle
Jam. (For years, I've wanted to get to a Jingle Ball. This was absolutely
the next best thing.)
The drive there and back was some
great stuff, in and of itself. (I love road trips.)
The first performer was Natalie. The
second was Baby Bash. From where I was sitting, he looked cute. Third was
Frankie J. He had kind of a Justin/Usher vibe. He gave a good performance;
he really put out the effort, and I appreciated it.
Who else was there... Howie Day.
Lifehouse. (I used to think that Lifehouse was Westlife. I'm over that now.)
Gavin DeGraw gave a great performance. Seriously, he got the crowd the
loudest it had been all night. It finally began to feel like a *concert*.
Between performers, a DJ played
music. He was terrible. Maybe he was having a bad night?
The radio station's DJ's interviewed
the performers backstage, live, and showed the interview on a screen for us.
When they interviewed Backstreet, SCREAM! To be honest, I sat down for most
of the show (sorry), but when Backstreet was onscreen I was standing up.
(Everyone else kind of did it the other way, standing for the show and
sitting for the screen. But it was Backstreet! I can't sit during
Backstreet!)
During the interview, AJ and Howie
and Brian tried to sit on the same chair together. Brian fell off. Nick had
headphones on; he was getting into concert mode, listening to "a band called
Him." (Did he mean H.I.M.?)
Every time they announced upcoming
performers, the crowd got loudest for the Pussycat Dolls and the Backstreet
Boys. I expected that when the Dolls finally got onstage, they'd get a huge
reaction. Not the case. I kind of felt bad for them.
Then...Backstreet. Dude. THE CROWD
GOT LOUD. I mean, we'd all been having a pretty good time, but for the
Street? WE WERE INTO IT.
Everyone else performed three or four
songs. Backstreet performed (I think) seven. It felt like they gave us a
whole concert!
Brian had on a red shirt that was a
little more fitted than usual. Hot. Nick's bangs were down over his eyes.
Hot. Halfway through, he slicked his hair back with water. Hot. Howie
winked. I screamed.
Brian had us sing, "We Wish You a
Merry Christmas."
Nick nuzzled Brian. Dude. How loudly
did I scream for that? I know you heard it. Then, when the show was over,
Nick picked up Howie, threw him over his shoulder, and carried him offstage.
Did that give anyone else an orgasm,
or was it just me?
It was a great show. I mean, it was
like everyone else was just an opening act. There was a huge difference in
the crowd. And I would chalk that up to the crowd getting successively more
hyped up with each performer, except that we responded to Gavin a lot more
than the Dolls, who came after him.
The Boys interacted all through the
show. Brian and Howie had a whole conversation about something.
I LOVE BACKSTREET.
So does *NSYNC. Want proof? Diamond gave me footage from a report on a charity basketball game (Europe, roughly ten years ago). The Boys and the Syncs were all there. (So were other people, but they're all incidental.) AJ was on the Sync team; Lance was on the Boy team. (Not a fair trade.) Chris mounted Brian - - hugged him, jumped up on him, pawed through his hair, etc. (They're the same height; it's too adorable.) Then (while Kevin was sitting on the floor) Chris crawled all into Kevin's lap for a hug. Joey hugged Brian and picked him right up. Lance hung all over AJ. The Syncs love the Boys. It's a beautiful thing.
I love this footage particularly right now because Chris being all over Brian and Kevin is too "Sucker" and Lance wanting AJ is very "Living." Sweet. (Supersweet.)
P.S. Who's your favorite "Sucker" villain? Vote here.
December 2, 2005
Say what you want about TV programming; someone should have warned me about the commercials.
Why am I seeing TV ads for Judge Alito? It's not like I can vote him onto the Supreme Court. Am I supposed to see the ad, get fired up, and call my Senator in a display of support for Strip Search Sammy? Because that's just not going to happen.
Also, according to another commercial, if I go buy a car from a certain local dealership, I can get a free shotgun! It's shotgun giveaway days! Just in time for hunting season! I'm not familiar with this "shotgun with purchase" way of doing business; does this happen in other states?
My Internet connection keeps disappearing. I'll post "Sucker" as soon as I can.
While I'm waiting...more ramble! Why do I have this weird, stupid crush on Joel Madden? It hit me really hard the other day when I saw a picture of him without bracing myself properly beforehand.
I love Backstreet.
Aaron turns 18 in a few days. I bought his movie, but I haven't gotten past the first few seconds yet because of that whole "having no free time" thing. Maybe I'll see it this weekend? Here's a question for you: why do I, also known as nobody, have glaringly better quality banners than some DVD's have cover art on their boxes? The Pop Star box, for example, does Aaron a great injustice, while I have much better banners of him specifically. Who's in charge of designing these things? And why can several people I've met on-line do much better for free from home? I mean, these are professionally produced movies and professional graphic artists.
Okay, yes, I believe that two of my bannerists do graphic art-type things for a living, but most of them don't.
I mean, look at the back cover - - it doesn't even look like his head's on right. That cannot be that boy's neck - - you know how skinny he is. If you have this movie, stare at the back cover, right below his ear. Did they put Aaron's head on someone else's body? Did they use his own head on his own body, but from separate pictures?
And in the first two seconds of the movie that I did see, he jumps right out of a car, already wearing his headset; he walks straight through the backstage area, while a make-up artist swipes powder at his face; and then he runs onstage. Okay, does that ever really happen? I know that I get a million things wrong and my stories are hideously factually inaccurate, but I make this up as I go along and I don't pretend to know what I'm talking about. Poetic license is one thing, but did this writer or director try to get it right? And maybe that would work with another actor, but this is Aaron Carter - - I know that he knows better.
Did you notice in Backstreet's "Sessions @ AOL" that when they sing "I Want It That Way," Nick isn't shown doing his own ad-libs? I can hear it, but it looks like he's singing something else. Did the director cut and paste it that badly? Do you think that I can't tell when Nick's mouth doesn't match what I'm hearing? I'm sure that Nick actually was singing it correctly at the time; I think that it's just the editor having too much fun getting the shot he wants and not paying attention well.
[Matthew writes and deletes personal life stuff.]
So, Christmas is this month. I must buy presents.
Oh! I just got a series of amazing compliments on the Mattpanel. That was pretty awesome. ElizabethB suggested a new, more generous way for me to view "Living," too. Apparently she noticed that I tend to be critical of it. Am I that obvious? I mean, I love "Living," I do, it's just that it's written very badly. But I love the guys and I love the love and I love the lessons. I love the message.
Okay, seriously, why is my connection this bad? What's wrong? Everything's all plugged in just right. What's going on? Oh! Hey! Here we go! Wish me luck...
Sigh. So close. Another try...
Seriously, though, shotgun with purchase?
Oh, that's great. The pages I'm begging to load won't cooperate, but the porn ads pop up with no trouble. (There's a metaphor in there, somewhere.)
Waiting... Waiting...
Singing to myself...
Dancing in place to amuse myself...
Hey, look. Aaron's movie also stars Tracy Scoggins, Leif Garrett, Vanessa Angel, Tom Bosley, David Cassidy, and Jordan Knight.
Seriously, should I give up on posting "Sucker" tonight? This is ridiculous. My lack of connection is worse now than it was when I started.
And, suddenly, it developed a spurt of energy. Thanks for getting my hopes up. Okay, let's give this another try...
I've given you more pointless ramble than usual tonight. Sorry about that. I could give you ramble of more substance, if you want me to rehash the capital punishment debate I had last night. It won't surprise you to know that I do not support the death penalty.
We interrupt this fascinating story to announce that we may have significant improvements in the Internet area! Wish me well, dear reader; wish me well.
November 28, 2005
Since 99% of the time, the banner on the boyslash page is for "Sucker," I try not to put "Sucker" banners here, too. (There are almost 300 other stories on the site, so it's really not fair to give the one incomplete story all of the glory.) But I like this banner; it represents Lance and Jacob being catty, which is always fun. I also have a few comments on it, for your edification.
First of all, notice that one cat has blue eyes and the other has green eyes. Aha, yes. Therefore, one is Jacob and one is Lance. Nice detail by the artist, there. Also, since not everyone knows this, yes, Jacob can sing in Italian. In his pre-Town days, he was a waiter at an Italian restaurant. He displayed his Italian-singing capabilities on TRL once upon a time, for the enjoyment of all.
(The Boys sing in English, Spanish, French, and Italian. There's no point to mentioning that; I just like to brag.)
As far as actually knowing a second language - - hey, I've sung in several other languages during my time, but I didn't claim to be fluent - - we all know about Lance and his Russian skills, and Howie's high school Spanish. I, myself, took five years of Spanish. Hola. Also, mi madre esta en la cocina. See, the American educational system does well.
In completely unrelated news... AJ's hottest video outfit ever has to be from "Larger Than Life." Wow. Dude. Dude. I mean, we've all known that for years now, but, still. It's worth mentioning.
November 26, 2005
I already have my first 2006 calendar. It's Orlando. I WANT BACKSTREET!
It's stupid how all day long I think oh, I want to mention this on Mattbrain, or, oh, yeah, I wanted to say that - - and then I get here and I'm like, uh, um... What did I want to say?
Anyway, so, I have nothing new or profound to say, but, I LOVE BACKSTREET.
Updated to add:
Since "Sucker" has created some new O-Town fans (I'm powerful like that - - what, you expected me to be modest about this?), I'm passing along a note from Vanessa. As it turns out, Inside O-Town is not only a good O-Town site, it also has some "Making the Band" season three clips, summaries, etc. (Vanessa says to go under "Entertainment" and click on "Making the Band." Some of the clips may work, but some may not; if they don't, try using media player and type in "O-Town.") You know that I don't link off-site, but you can cut and paste: insideotown.com. They link to one of the best sites on the Net. (No, not mine.)
November 23, 2005
Tomorrow is the traditional USA holiday of Thanksgiving, so, happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
How did I miss the AMA's last night? Why did I miss the AMA's last night? It's entirely my fault, but I'm still frustrated. I wouldn't care except the Boys were there!
I love the Backstreet Boys.
New Drewboard poll here. Question for "Sucker" readers here.
At one point, I got a nice, comfortable lead on "Sucker," and I was far enough ahead that I could pause to write other things. So I worked on Book #2. And then I realized that it was SU's 5-year anniversary, so I stopped to write some slash. And now I'm working on "Sucker" again. There are scenes I'm trying to get to, but I hit a stupid little spot that I can't get past, and I've spent all week rewriting the same set of pages, and now it's all just idiotic. Also, I just had a revelation about how I can make a certain scene better, so I have to go back and rewrite that, too. It's all in an effort to make "Sucker" better, but, still, ARGH. I'm not used to revising what I write - - I'm used to just writing whatever comes out and going on from there - - so this whole discipline thing is hard.
Also, one of the many things that I want to write is a certain "Slice of Life" that shall be The Best Slice Ever. I really want to write it, but it's way too long for me to get into right now, so I'm being really strong and holding myself back from it. Except, there's a certain amount of turnover in the slash world - - fans come and go - - and I don't want to write it too late after all of you guys have moved on. Because you'd miss out on something that could be really cool. I really think that this "Slice" is a must-read for all Lifers. So, I don't know, either I have to find a way to write it soon, or you guys have to stick around until I get it done.
November 22, 2005
Just saying hi. Hi!
November 20, 2005
New banners from Vanessa, Glamour, and Brenhamella today!
The funny thing is, Vanessa and Brenhamella both bannered the recent "Sucker" Kevin/Justin scenes, only Vanessa bannered Justin's side and Brenhamella bannered Kevin's. So if you put the banners up side-by-side, they're arguing with each other. Justin's all "I love you" and Kevin's all, "Do I look interested in your chatter?"
To make good on my promise to the update list folks, there's a new story up. There may be more coming soon.
November 18, 2005
Here's what I was thinking about today. It'll make more sense if you're familiar with the NBC sitcom "Joey," the "Friends" spin-off.
Joey. He's an actor. Italian-American, from New York. He's a sweetheart and a loyal guy who loves the ladies. Sound familiar?
My brain was like, hmm, okay, what about everyone else on the show? So, here's my cast.
Michael is the math/science guy, so I gave that role to Cosmonaut Bass.
Joey's agent Bobbie is crazy, so clearly, that should be Chris.
I gave the role of Alex (the neighbor) to JC - - she's smart but a little ditzy. That left me with Justin as Gina (Joey's sister), which makes no sense. Maybe Justin should be the new guy they added this season, Zack. (How does he spell it? Zach? Zak?) That makes sense, actually, since Zack's a fellow actor. But then there's no Gina, unless-
AJ!
Or is that typecasting?
And you'd have to explain how whoever plays Gina (AJ?) is Lance's parent figure, which could take some creativity.
November 11, 2005
Today marks SU's fifth anniversary. That's right, five years. Five years of this site, of my slash, of you guys changing my life.
I'd like to thank Ewan McGregor for starring in Velvet Goldmine. I loved his character and that movie so much that I went on-line to search for merchandise, which took me to a site called "Lipstick Traces." That site just happened to be a slash site; I'd never heard of slash before, but the second I figured out what it was, I was like oh, wow, really?! From there, I found a whole new world.
I'd like to thank the Savage Garden slashwriters for showing me that some writers were slashing real people and putting it on the Net. Gasp! (This was years ago, when the prospect of RPS horrified 98% of slashers, back in the days before "popslash" was everywhere.)
I'd like to thank Bonnie and her Yahoo! group, Thian and his Yahoo! group, and all of the who-knows-how-many slash lists that let me experiment on them when I finally grew brave enough to show my work to the world.
I'd like to thank Robin and Bonnie and Slashcity for hosting this site (and recently increasing my bandwidth - - awesome).
I'd like to thank Diamond for the site's design; Alla for some great page layouts; and Brenhamella for running the banner archive.
I'd like to thank all of the bannerists for all of their incredible work. Adam, Addie, Adrienne, aimee, Alla, Allen, Aqua, aradia, Ath, Az, Bartleby, Becky, Beth, Betty, Brenhamella, Brey, Brian, br, Chased Amy, Cams, Danielle, Diamond, Drew, DS, Erica, Erin, Gizy, Glamour, Granitite Stone, Heidi, Hilary, Ice, Iness, jme, Julienne, Kate, KB, Kimberley, Kita, Kristi, Lady Farcly, Lalig, Lar, Leah, Legs, Leslie Lee, Lily, Lis, Lisa, Livia, Marina, MA, Meko, MeloncholyWay, Miazilla, Retracavol, Rina, Sammymc, Sarah, Sarah S., Sassygrrl, Schitzo, Secret Mistress, Steph, Turlough, Valen, Vanessa, Webster, and WF. You guys area amazing.
I'd like to think the old Drewchatters, the new Mattpanelists, and all of the Drewboarders. And everyone on the update list who gets a weekly dose of me in the in-box.
I'd like to thank the feedbackers.
I'd like to thank the gift-givers and letter-writers and post card-senders.
I'd like to thank everyone who bought my book.
I'd like to thank all of the slash writers I used to read, who inspired me years ago.
I'd like to thank the Backstreet Boys. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't have started "Living," and that saga just about took over my life for years. I can't tell you how thoroughly it's changed my world. If I weren't this thoroughly in love with the Boys, I wouldn't have spent five years writing about them to this extent. And I never would have drawn in *NSYNC, 98 Degrees, O-Town, etc. Maybe I would have written more slash in other fandoms, and also had more time to write original stories and become a professional author... But I also wouldn't have had these fundamentally changing experiences, and I wouldn't have made some incredible friends.
In five years, this site has seen the end of "Living" and the beginning of "Sucker," a board, a panel, a weekly chat, a second site, and this rambling page. I've been praised, awarded, thanked, harassed, and flamed. Since SU was born, we've seen the solo success of some of our guys, and the "back again!" of the Boys. I showed up as Black and Blue came out, and I'm still here, still slashing, five years later, after the release of Never Gone.
It's been an amazing five years. My life - - my perspective, my existence - - has been changed and shaped and changed again. You guys, some of you have been here since the beginning, some of you are brand-new to the site, and most of you joined the journey somewhere along the way. I hope that you stay a little while longer.
Sometimes I get overwhelmed by how generous you guys are and how much credit you give me. Some of you have shared some very personal stories that I took very much to heart. I wish that I could do more and be more for you guys. I wish that I could give you five new stories a day and answer every e-mail message within five minutes and invite you to my house. The truth is, I'm human, I'm overworked, I get stressed out, I'm way behind in e-mail, and I can't predict when any of those things will change.
But the site's still here.
On the Internet, five years is grandpa age. But I'm not ready to retire. There's still too much to write! "Sucker" and "Slices" and more Street slash and more Sync slash and all of those other fandoms I've been ignoring for too long.
A round of applause for SU. Five years, man. Bring out the cake and light the candles.
November 9, 2005 again
Nick Carter has the "big gay following" in November 22nd's Advocate (Sheryl Swoopes on cover). We love you, Nick! WHOO-HOO!
(Great timing, really - - I almost missed it, since that issue's actually my last; my subscription's run out. What a terrific way to say good-bye! Although featuring Nick is a great way to tempt me to renew... Was this some sort of plot?)
In unrelated news, just a reminder: the slash community is an underground community. Please don't approach the slash subjects to announce, "Hey, I read/write slash about you!" Discretion is appreciated. Thanks.
November 9, 2005
My webhosting people moved SU to a new server last night. They had some trouble, so my site was gone for a little while there. When they put it back, they used old pages. But everything's back up now, and I'm trying to make sure that everything's properly updated. (If you see anything missing/wrong, please let me know.)
November 7, 2005
On the other site, I've added new "Save the World" links. I included new links to on-line stores so you can do some shopping. It'd be great to give some save-the-world merchandise for the holidays. You get to help people and be generous to your friends and family, at the same time! Hooray!
November 6, 2005
I knew that I forgot one!
Joey feels threatened by Sonic Boom and is no longer 100% certain of his role in AJ's life. If he came to you, you'd advise him to...
Focus on the game, partner up with Nick, and turn his Dan-hatred onto Ashley 69.6%
Forget Dan; he should worry about AJ and Justin 13.0%
Try to make AJ jealous using Nick and/or Ashley 8.7%
Eliminate the threat (take Dan out) 4.3%
Try to prove himself to AJ and win AJ back 4.3%
November 5, 2005 (again)
Bear with me. This could get muddy.
I can't find the actual place where I said this, but a while ago, I said that I wouldn't write incest anymore. Apparently, I said that I couldn't do it because Diamond wouldn't let me.
Let's cover the "Diamond wouldn't let me" aspect first. Apparently, this (and other statements on my part) has led people to believe that I do whatever Diamond says. I don't, frankly. She does have great taste and great judgment, and she understands the way my brain works, and often she's someone I turn to when I'm trying to figure out something. But I also can get very territorial about what I write. I'm a very private person, and I've always been a very private writer. There are a lot of times when I know exactly what I want and I refuse to be deterred from it. And, for the record, there are a lot of things that I never discuss with her. She gets surprised by "Sucker" twists and turns just like the rest of you.
Also, the idea that I do whatever Diamond says seems to have invited people to think that maybe I'll do whatever they say, too. I've had a lot of requests to write certain pairings, write certain fandoms, write certain stories, etc. It's flattering, because if you didn't believe that I'd pull it off well, you wouldn't ask me to write it. But trust me when I say that I have plenty of story ideas on my own, and not even a tenth of the time that I need to write them all. Believe me, if you're asking for (random example) Brian/Howie slash, I want to write Brian/Howie slash. I'd love to put up Brian/Howie stories all over this site. That goes for AJ/Kevin and Lance/JC and everyone else. Asking me for it isn't likely to get me to write it. It makes me feel pressured to write it, and then I get a weird tension about writing it, and then I find it harder to write. So, really, asking me for a certain pairing probably makes me less likely to write that pairing, if anything.
I'm not picking up new fandoms at the moment, either. There are a number of fandoms on this site. There are more in my head that haven't made it into a completed story yet. But asking me if I have plans to slash a certain show or a certain singer, etc., is probably going to be met with a no. I don't have time to pick up anyone new. I don't have enough time to write all of the stories that I want to write about the subjects I already have.
One more thing - - some people ask me for more short, quick stories. Some people ask me for longer, serial-type stories. Do you see how it doesn't make sense to deliberately do either one just to satisfy someone's preference? I write long stories, and I write short stories, both lengths, on both sites. I understand that you have a preference. I have preferences as a reader, too. As a writer, if I tried to meet everyone's needs and everyone's demands, I'd end up writing everything or nothing. So the needs that I do my best to meet, are my own. I really am flattered by the fact that you'd take the time to ask me for certain things, because it means that you think enough of me as a writer to want more from me. But I can't be everything to everyone.
I don't write for Diamond. I don't write for Elizabeth or Vanessa or Adam or anyone else. I do my best to write for me. I hope that you understand that. If I worked for someone else, if I were paid by a corporation to write, then I'd write for them. But this is my site, my time, my money. I love you guys, but I don't work for you.
It is true that I talked with Diamond about incest. We did discuss it, and after those conversations, I came to the "no more incest" conclusion. At the time, I kind of resented that conclusion, so in a sulking moment I pushed the responsibility for that decision onto her. But it wasn't her decision. She was correct; incest is wrong, and I agree with her, due to my own thoughts on the subject.
(I really hope that you don't think I'm a jack*** now. I get a lot of e-mail and a lot of demands and a lot of pressure from a lot of people, and it's been five years now, and every once in a while, I just have to get things off my chest. Because you can't read my mind, so if I don't say something, no one knows to consider it.)
Oh, yeah - - it's been five years now. SU is five years old on the 11th. Wow.
Okay... On to the subject of incest.
Where do I begin?
I didn't decide to stop writing incest "because Diamond told me not to." Here are some of the somewhat coherent reasons:
It's wrong. Incest is one of those things that collectively, as a human society, we all agree shouldn't happen. Brothers shouldn't have sex with their brothers. The idea of going down on your sister shouldn't be hot. There are certain things that are taboo for good reason.
I understand that what I write is fiction. And as a writer, I love to let my mind just spin and take me to all sorts of places. Places where all sorts of things happen. In my brain, there are endless possibilities.
But as a human being, I have certain responsibilities. I don't want to connect myself with, "Hey, read Matthew's stuff, there's all sorts of bestiality in there!" Um...no. No, no, no, no, no. Also, the images of gay men that are presented to us are already twisted and negative, from certain sources. I absolutely don't want to be responsible for adding to negative stereotypes by filling my site with pedophilia and incest and "those gay guys will screw anything and anybody, with no regard for right or wrong!"
What I write for myself is my own freedom of expression. I can write whatever I want to write in my own home on my own time. I can write ten brothers all screwing each other as much as I want to, in my own house. That's me exploring what I want to explore. However, when I put it on the Net, it's like handing it over to the public. That comes with a greater responsibility. I'm delivering these stories to a certain number of people every day, and I'm responsible for the content.
I used to rattle on and on about how I write for myself, no one can tell me what to do, I refuse to censor myself, etc. But these websites are bodies of work that I present to the world. No matter what I used to think or how "anonymous" the Net is, I have an image of myself to protect. And an image of gay men that I'd like to protect as well. An image of people as a whole.
No incest. No pedophilia. There are enough child molesters in the world without me sexualizing teenagers.
Here comes a mild, quasi-retraction.
I write what I want to write. If, for some reason, at some point in the future, I write a story where Brian and Kevin kiss, that's up to me. I do have a "Slice of Life" started where Drew and Nick Lachey's love for each other is more than brotherly, because "Slices of Life" are based on "Living," and I wouldn't be true to the characters if I completely ignored that aspect. Will I write about them screwing each other, well, no.
Here's the thing. It's not like I have some burning desire to write incest that I'm holding myself back from. I have no need to write Drew/Nick. I have no interest in writing Nick/Aaron. I'm not really into Kevin/Brian because, well, they're cousins. A little Merry/Pippin, sure, okay, yes, maybe, but I'm so busy with everything else that I haven't even had time to get into that.
I make my own decisions. I unmake my own decisions. I write what I want to write. I don't write what Diamond wants me to write. I don't want to write incest, just like I don't want to write rape and murder and drug abuse. On occasion, something along those lines come up, and then it's up to me to make the final decision about what makes the cut and what doesn't. I have to trust my own judgment. Most of the time, I make the right decision.
You know, I can't believe that I'm sitting here defending why I don't write incest. I shouldn't have to discuss it. I shouldn't even have written it in the first place. This is kind of a sign that I've made the right decision.
November 5, 2005
An update on the Drewboard polls. (I didn't intend to keep talking about these polls, but people keep voting, which is way cool.)
AJ/Dan 35.4%
Nick/Ashley 31%
Brian/Jacob 20.8%
Howie/Erik 6.3%
Kevin/Trevor 6.3%
AJ and Dan remain in the lead, but there's been a nice show of support for Nick and Ashley. AJ/Dan is all about the passion, the intensity, the violence. Nick/Ashley is all about, um... Giving in to your inner slut? Or being totally enslaved to Nick Carter's sex appeal. Which I am totally on board for.
Justin/Dan 53.3%
Chris/Trevor 26.7%
Joey/Ashley 11.1%
Lance/Jacob 8.9%
JC/Erik 0.0%
Justin and Dan forever! Chris and Trevor sometimes! JC and Erik never! (Just so you know, e-mailing me to ask me to write Justin/Dan sex stories for you doesn't work. Sorry. It's extremely flattering that you want me to write, but I don't write on command.)
Favorite Street/Sync pairing #1:
Kevin/Justin 33.3%
Nick/JC 33.3%
Howie/Lance 22.2%
Brian/Chris 8.9%
AJ/Joey 2.2%
Kevin and Justin are tied with Nick and JC. Howie/Lance fans had better step it up.
Favorite Street/Sync pairing #2:
AJ/Justin 52.2%
Brian/Lance 17.4%
Kevin/Chris 17.4%
Howie/JC 6.5%
Nick/Joey 6.5%
Everyone loves AJ/Justin. Because they hate each other and they're mean to each other and they'd rather be with other people, and that's just fun.
Of the four remaining couples, which is the pairing you'd most like to see take that final step?
Justin/Dan 59.3%
Brian/Jacob 24.1%
Howie/Erik 11.1%
Kevin/Trevor 5.6%
Every time I try to type comments on the above poll, I give things away. So: no comment.
(O-Town fans may want to skip this poll):
Which one of the Towns would you most like to see annihilated by the Boys and Syncs?
Jacob 84%
Ashley 8.0%
Dan 4.0%
Erik 4.0%
Trevor 0.0%
Well, I would announce Jacob the clear winner, except that also makes him the loser. Sorry, Jacob. Maybe we'll announce Trevor the winner. Why doesn't anyone want to hurt Trevor the most? Why would you want to hurt Ashley, Dan, or Erik the most? The above polls kind of show Dan as a definite favorite. Maybe you want to take down the hero? You're out to get Erik? You have so little respect for Ashley that you want to take him out? What's so great about Trevor? What's so wrong with Jacob? (Okay, I rescind that last question.)
November 4, 2005
There were a bunch of things that I wanted to say to you, but I don't have time at this exact minute. I'll be back later!
October 29, 2005
(Disclaimer: Okay, for the most part, if you want to know what's up with the Mattpanel, you'll have to join to find out. But, this time, I just had to share. I'm not attributing the quotations to actual people, because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, so names have been removed to protect the innocent.)
I asked the Mattpanel, "Is there anything that Brian won't do?"
Personally, my immediate answer was, no. Flat-out no. There's nothing that Brian won't do.
A lot of the Mattpanelists agreed with me. (And they should have. Good for them. Smart people.)
Some of them saw the situation differently. They had some terrific answers. One of the things that I like about the panel is that there are enough people there that we get all sorts of perspectives and personalities involved.
Here were the first ten answers to, "Is there anything that Brian won't do?"
I think that Brian will do
anything to mess these people up. This has just been a little preview of it.
He has played this game before, and held nothing back then so why should he
now.
Well, Brian's going to have sex with
Jacob eventually, isn't he? I dunno about you guys, but that says that Brian
will basically do anything to get his way, or to have fun, or to achieve
whatever ends he's looking for.
He won't betray his Boys. Other than
that... <shrugs>
Nope I don't think there is....well
like someone else said hurt the other bsb boys but other than that I think
anything is game with him.
I hope so. I hope Brian has limits. I
hope Brian knows when to draw the line. I hope. I hope a lot, and I pray.
No. There isn't anything Brian won't
do. He's shameless, and of course, a sociopath. Brian's scary, man.
Make Chris sane again. It might be
physically impossible.
Tell the complete and honest truth
Scary Brian is all about winning and
he will do anything to achieve his goals.
At this point, I'd say no. He's not
going to do anything to put the game in jeopardy, but he's pretty much going
to do whatever he wants to get the reaction he desires. Just like the rest
of the Boys.
October 28, 2005
Hooray for the Mattpanel!
And for the Drewboard. And the bannerists. And the feedbackers. And the readers and lurkers. And especially for Drew Lachey, because yesterday (completely unexpectedly!) I saw a 98 video and I fell in love all over again.
How can you not love Drew?
Now I feel like slicing.
(Translation: Now I feel like writing a "Slice of Life," a short story based in the "Living" universe. "Living" is known by several other names, including "The Series That Wouldn't Die," "Matthew's Homage to Drew," and "JC and Justin: The Straitjacket Years.")
October 21, 2005
Wow. The Mattpanel's going well.
I'll be back on Tuesday. See you guys then! Love Backstreet while I'm gone. (Yes, and *NSYNC, too. And 98. And O-Town. And - - don't scoff like that! O-Town's great. Hey, hey! Stop rolling your eyes at me!)
October 19, 2005
The Mattpanel is up and running. I'm a member. Are you?
Mattpanelists unite!
October 18, 2005
Chris's birthday was yesterday. We love Chris. Happy birthday, Chris.
AJ is three years sober this Sunday, the 23rd. We love AJ.
My birthday's on Sunday, too. I mentioned on the update list that I'll try to post early this week, on Thursday. Due to scheduling conflicts, if I don't post on Thursday, I won't be able to post until Tuesday or Wednesday. Which would be unfortunate. So I'll try to get that done on Thursday. Anyway, to celebrate my birthday, you can send feedback, or birthday cards, or Backstreet merchandise, or boy band merchandise, or Nick Carter. Or you can buy my book. Or you can buy me a new car. Although I'd rather have Nick.
So here's something amazing. Remember how JC Carter is posting "Sucker" in Spanish? Now someone's translating it into Chinese! (Matthew Haldeman-Time, taking over the world, one language at a time.) The site is here. The username is bonedaddy and the password is 030101248. Having someone translate your work is a huge, huge, huge compliment. It would be a great compliment if someone wanted to translate anything I wrote. But "Sucker?" That's an undertaking.
Oh, I forgot to mention that the Drewboard is now open to everyone, again. No more registering first; just show up and say what you want to say.
Also, there's a new poll. It's about Joey, and AJ, and Sonic Boom.
And, if anyone wants to toss out some ideas for a "Living" soundtrack, that'd be cool. Ellie brought it up, and since all of our old posts on the subject have disappeared, it'd be fun to see what we can come up with.
As I mentioned in previous posts, I'm
revising a certain "Sucker" storyline. It's frustrating me, and I'm in
the middle of a set of scenes that aren't going well, so I took a few days
off to write other things. (That's what we call "procrastination.")
So Diamond was all, "What are you working on?" and I was like, "Just this
thing, you know, whatever," and she was all, "Let me read it," and I was
like, "It's just a beginning, but, I guess, okay, whatever," so I handed it
over, and she read it. And in between the time I showed it to her and
the next time we talked, she a.) read it and b.) made two banners for it.
Score.
Anyway, I haven't seen these banners yet, although as soon as I talk to her again I'm going to make her show me. But, since it's Diamond, seriously, do we doubt that they're excellent? However, my problem is, see, the story that I showed her is one of those "this is going to be a brand new saga" stories - - not as bad as "Sucker" or "Living," but, you know, long. And we all know that I don't have time for that. I don't have time to write this sentence, so I don't have time to write a new long, multi-person story. Except now I have two banners for it. So I have to finish the story, so I can show everyone the banners.
Perhaps my priorities are screwy.
Although, I'm thinking, any story that has Diamond excited, can't be that bad. So maybe it's a good story with a lot of promise. And it'd be nice to write something good. So... We'll see.
It's probably not fair to bring up a story that you can't read. But it's also not fair of her to give me banners that I can't post. So we're all unhappy. Except Diamond, who seems to be coming out ahead.
I wouldn't mention that Diamond gets to read things in advance, except you guys have known that since "Destiny." So, I figure it's old news.
Dude. You can read "Sucker" in English, Spanish, or Chinese. That's amazing.
(I intended to put up a Chris banner or an AJ banner at the top of the page. But I had a sudden attack of utter indecisiveness, and considering how many banners I have, if I can't choose one, I'm in trouble. So I put up Nick. Always a winner.)
October 14, 2005
You guys are terrific! I just checked my banner mail and got wonderful new banners from Glamour, Vanessa, Brenhamella, MiaZilla, and DS! That's five different people, yo.
DS happens to be a graphic artist with her own on-line Backstreet slash comic book, so her banner's a little different. Very cool; check her banner out, along with the others, here.
October 10, 2005
Turn up your volume and go to the "Sucker" page. Click on Dan. Thank Diamond.
ElizabethB has generously overlooked the fact that I owe her 35 e-mail messages (okay, I owe all of you e-mail messages) and has begun an interesting "Sucker" thread. She raises a bunch of good points, like, will the guys make it through "Sucker?" How much more can they take? Personally, I'd like to hear more about the discussion she mentioned on what Jacob did to Lance. (Rape? Penetration? Something else?) And she says that at one point during "Sucker" she's liked all of the guys from O-Town, so I want to know at what point did she like each one of them, because Diamond has yet to like Jacob. There are many points along the way that I've liked Jacob, and Erik, and everyone else, but sometimes I sense that I'm alone, there.
ElizabethB's post is here. Also, apparently, I made DS cry, and miazilla and InsideOfYourHead think that AJ's a bad guy, and Violet121179 just wants to see AJ have sex with Dan. (Don't we all?)
I intended to open a new poll today, but I had too many poll ideas, so give me a minute to choose one.
October 7, 2005
Personal life info: this week at work has been very up and down. It's been bad news! Bad news! Good news! Bad news! Bad news! Good news! Bad news! I try not to dwell on the bad, because there's not much I can do about it, and I try to remind myself of the good, in hopes of making it outweigh the bad. Still, it's frustrating.
"Sucker" info: Usually, I write pretty much what you read. I write the scenes in the order that they show up on the screen. However, recently, I wrote (for example) a Justin plotline, and then a Brian plotline, and then an Erik plotline, etc. Then everything was out of sequence, and I had to weave the stories together to get a narrative flow. It took a lot of shifting and shuffling, to get the timeline right, so that each plot had the right pacing.
As I mentioned in a previous post here, I have to rewrite one of the storylines. That means that I'll have to reshuffle the scenes. This shuffling will involve several parts. It's all a positive thing, because it should make "Sucker" a better story. But I'm somewhat irritated, because I thought that I'd finished those parts and could move on. Apparently not.
You should've seen me weaving the plotlines together, the first time around. First, I tried to put everything together. Then I enlisted someone else's help, and the someone else color-coded the storylines and reshuffled them. Then the two of us looked at the parts all over again and re-reshuffled everything. It took us hours. By the end, I felt really good about it, I was happy with what we'd done. I thought that I had a good product, and I was happy to have that many parts all completed.
Sigh.
So, if you wonder what I'm doing this weekend, I'm wrestling "Sucker" into submission. (Where's Kevin's whip?)
October 6, 2005
It's a good thing that I write "Sucker" ahead of where I'm posting, to give myself some negotiating room. Because I have a lot of rewriting to do, suddenly. The timeline of a certain triangle's storyline has changed, which means a.) a major rewrite for those three guys and b.) a ripple effect on other plotlines. So, fun times ahead for me and the revising process.
Poll update:
In the previous set of polls, Nick and JC are only one vote ahead of Kevin and Justin.
In the more recent poll, Justin and Dan have over half of the votes, so I think that we can agree that most readers would like to see Justin and Dan get it on, more than the other couples listed. People may just not want to watch Jacob have sex.
October 3, 2005
Someone has offered her own great list of ways to celebrate Kevin's birthday.
1.) Make AJ McLean your bitch "Kevin gets what Kevin wants" (Living)
2.) Make Nick Carter get down on his
knees and service you, at your whim, in a public place - cuffed (Borders)
3.) Strap a ball gag on Howie and go
- to - town (Keep Trying)
4.) Be the Backstreet Boy of choice
to be invited to Howie's ass for the first time, blow his winky mind and
make him forget AJ is watching (Batteries Not Included)
Happy birthday, Kevin!
Kevin and Nick have proven to be two of SU's hardest doms and best subs. I've slashed Nick more than anyone else, so he's pretty much had a chance to play any role in any type of relationship. Kevin's ruled over a number of people - - most notably Nick himself and poor, crazy Justin.
Since Kevin and Nick got the chance to turn the tables on each other ("Beautiful Whore" versus "Borders"), maybe Justin should have the chance to dominate Kevin for a while.
It would give Justin a chance to get out of his victim role, for once. (To see poor, crazy Justin at his best/worst, read "Living," "Sucker," "Attainable," and pretty much every SU story he's in.)
Justin/Kevin. (Closing my eyes. Picturing it. Justin/Kevin. Justin/Kevin. The new movie star Justin and Kevin with the new, touchable hair? Kevin's hair looks so thick... See, when Kevin had long hair, Justin could jerk him around by it; but now, it's so short, he's thinking of making Kevin wear a collar and chain, instead...)
Oh, my - - do you realize that I've written Drew/Kevin? No, seriously. I have. And I'm not even talking about this one. Dude. How does my brain do these things to me? And why do I choose to inflict them on innocent readers?
October 2, 2005
I'd like to thank Brenhamella one more time for running the banner archive for me. Thank you!
The latest poll results? Justin and Dan have 51.5% of the vote. That's over half. Brian and Jacob are trying to muster up one-fourth of the vote, with 24.2%. Howie and Erik-Michael are in third, with 15.2%. And Kevin and Trevor have 9.1%. Sorry, Kevin, no one's interested in your sex life.
Speaking of Kevin, it's his birthday tomorrow.
Happy birthday, Kevin!
Ways to celebrate Kevin's birthday, SU-style:
1.) Lust after AJ McLean. ("Living")
2.) Curse out Justin Timberlake. ("Sucker")
3.) Worship Nick Carter. ("Beautiful Whore")
4.) Be whisked off to an alternate dimension by Drew Lachey. ("The Weaver")
5.) Um... Urinate on someone and have sex with your cousin? ("Sin")
Personally, I'd go with #1 and #3. Although I wouldn't mind #4.
September 30, 2005
Den (September 2005 winner of the SU Lifetime Achievement Award for Sharing Vital Information) just passed this along to me, and I have to share it with you.
There's an article from September 14, 2005. An interview with our man Justin J.
"The group will be getting back together shortly, getting some of the rust off the vocal cords," he said. "We'll be in the studio together. We're talking about the next project, about how we're eager to get back together. We're all still tight."
Straight from Justin J.'s mouth, two weeks ago.
You can read the article for yourself at adelphia.net. (I don't link off-site, for a variety of reasons, but it's an AP article by Terry Kinney titled "98 Degrees Singer Not Done With Politics.")
Party at my house.
September 30, 2005
Poll results so far...
Kevin and Trevor, 0 votes. Brian/Jacob and Howie/Erik, 3 votes apiece. Justin and Dan have 6 votes so far.
Justin and Dan have 50% of the vote.
Dude, I don't want to call "Sucker" readers predictable, but this Dan crush is consistent.
If you agree that Justin and Dan are the couple you'd most like to see have sex, go show your support. If you're more in favor of Kev/Trev, B/J, or HD/EM, make your vote count. It all happens here.
September 29, 2005
Today's the 29th? I've been on the 28th all day.
It's weird, going a whole week without posting "Sucker." I'm lost without my Monday update.
There's a new poll up on the Drewboard. Which of the "Sucker" couples who haven't had sex yet, would you most like to see get around to it?
September 25, 2005
I taped the premiere of "Inconceivable" on Friday night. I hadn't seen a commercial for it and I had no idea if it would be good or not, but I heard that it had a gay couple, so I decided to give it a try. However (through no fault of my own, I'd like to add) it was taped over. So I haven't seen it. I guess I'll try again this Friday. If any of you guys saw it, what'd you think? Is it worth a look?
Here's the long version of the e-mail situation. I have a Juno account. If you give Juno money, they let you download your e-mail to your computer; if you don't pay them, you have to do it on-line like it's Yahoo! or Hotmail or anyone else. I had a subscription, but my subscription ran out. So I'm still using Juno, but on-line, with several million (small exaggeration there) old messages trapped on my computer. The Juno on-line account has limited space. I use an Outlook account for my banners (banners@matthewtime.com) but Outlook won't let me send messages out; it only lets me receive messages. So I use my Juno account to reply. (matthew@matthewtime.com, matthew@matthewhaldemantime.com, matthewtime@juno.com) Even though I reply to banner e-mail using my Juno account, please send all banners to banners@matthewtime.com, because not only does it keep me more organized that way, but my Juno in-box gets way too full.
I know, it's all inconvenient and stupid.
September 24, 2005
Sweet Uncleanness has been graced with new banners from Brenhamella and Vanessa and (drum roll, please) new bannerist Glamour. Everyone please make her feel welcome.
September 23, 2005
Happy "Sucker" part 50!
In honor of the occasion, Diamond has made a new "Sucker" page. See it here.
If you put your mouse directly over the guys' mouths, a line of dialogue will pop up. Just for fun.
Also, this is always worth a second look. Or a third look. Or a ninety-sixth look.
And, if you want some awesome "Sucker" desktop wallpaper by Diamond and Lalig, go here.
September 22, 2005
A while ago (weeks, months, it's all a blur) I was writing along, typing, typing, and I needed to know what color the sheets were in the Chris-in-the-closet, Lance-in-Brian "Sucker" scene. So I asked someone. And she told me that they were cream-colored originally but were changed to blue. I said, really, are you sure? She said, yes, absolutely.
I trusted her.
Sigh.
As it turns out, the sheets were blue, originally, and were changed to cream. So, I must make small changes to S46, S49, and the "Sucker" quiz. And wander through life ashamed.
Utterly, utterly ashamed.
September 19, 2005 again
September 19, 2005
Dude, these polls are getting more and more interesting.
The results, so far:
Favorite Sync/Town:
Justin/Dan 21
Chris/Trevor 9
Joey/Ashley 2
Lance/Jacob 2
JC/Erik-Michael 0
Favorite Street/Town:
AJ/Dan 14
Nick/Ashley 10
Brian/Jacob 5
Kevin/Trevor 3
Howie/Erik 2
Favorite Street/Sync #2 (new partnership)
AJ/Justin 10
Brian/Lance 6
Kevin/Chris 5
Howie/JC 3
Nick/Joey 1
Favorite Street/Sync #1 (pre-existing relationship)
Nick/JC 11
Kevin/Justin 10
Howie/Lance 8
Brian/Chris 3
AJ/Joey 1
You guys are so into this AJ/Justin/Dan triangle, it's awesome. Good for you. The Street/Sync #1 competition has stayed pretty hot; those top three couples (Nick/JC, Kevin/Justin, Howie/Lance) keep fighting for domination. Last time I looked, Kevin and Justin were in the lead, but now it's Nick and JC. (Come on, Howie/Lance fans, get in there. Support your guys.)
If you haven't voted yet, vote now. And when you do vote, post your comments, because you just might sway someone else over to your side.
I mentioned this weeks ago on the update list, but now it's official. This is the last Monday update. From now on, "Sucker" will only be posted on Fridays.
This whole poll thing has me thinking... I mean, Dan's way too popular
around here all of a sudden. Am I crazy, or is this the Drew effect?
("Living" Drew fans everywhere tense
and prepare to give Matthew evil, warning looks.)
Seriously. All of the elements are
there. Take a boy band member that the majority of readers don't know (or,
frankly, care) that much about, put him with someone vulnerable and wounded
who needs him, add a third person and some sex, and have Matthew write
hundreds of pages on the subject. All of a sudden, people get invested.
(Riled "Living" readers glare at
Matthew for daring to suggest any kind of comparison between Drew and Sonic
Boom. Nick's nostrils flare.)
I'm not saying that Dan is the next
Drew, I'm saying-
(Matthew ducks quickly.)
I said not! Not! He's not the next
Drew! He's just, you know, suddenly most readers' favorite member of O-Town,
when no one cared before.
Oh, man, I'm going to get in trouble for this.
It all sounded much better in my
head. My only point was, you guys like Dan, and you like him with Justin,
and you like him with AJ. Maybe that's AJ and Justin's fault.
Although if AJ alone could drag up someone's poll numbers, you'd think that
Joey would be doing well.
Maybe it's just that Dan comes across
as a good guy, when Erik lies to his best friends to get laid, and Ashley
cheats on the man he loves with the man he loves' boyfriend, and Jacob is
oh-so-Jacob. A lot of the guys in "Sucker" are selfish or cruel or at the
very least confused, and Dan is none of those things. Dan is selfless and
generous and very sure of his path.
No hazel eyes, though. Sigh.
September 17, 2005
(I was going to talk about this on the update list, but I'm sure that some of you aren't on the list, so I'll do it here.)
Sorry that "Sucker" is a day late. Entirely my fault. I've been sick since Sunday night (which is just ridiculous), and I've been working overtime, so I've spent all week being miserable. Friday I finally began to feel better, and after work I ran some errands, but I got caught out and, you know, then personal things occurred that you don't need to know about. Anyway, I got home late, got up and went to work this morning, and now work is over and I feel great so here you go: I'm updating "Sucker." It's a day late, and I apologize for that.
Thanks to everyone who's voted on the Drewboard "Sucker" polls! Keep voting: support your favorite couples!
September 12, 2005
New polls on the Drewboard. We're almost up to 50 parts of "Sucker." (With no end in sight. Why do I do this to myself?) The polls are on your favorite "Sucker" couples. Since there are 20 couples in "Sucker," I broke the polls down into four categories. Street/Sync 1, Street/Sync 2, Street/Town, and Sync/Town.
While you're asking yourself, "Hmm... Do I prefer AJ/Dan or Nick/Ashley?" you also should ask yourself, "Why would Matthew deliberately write a story with 20 couples?" Twenty! In "Living," there were (JC/Justin, Nick/Brian/Drew, Nick/Jeff, AJ/Lance, Chris/Howie, AJ/Kevin, Lance/Joey) seven couples. If you count Nick/Drew, Nick/Brian, and Brian/Drew as three couples instead of one set, and then include the extended Drewsome just for fun, that's (counting on my fingers) fifteen couples. But that's stretching it. And at least I had the sense to work up to that, adding a new couple with each story. With "Sucker," I jumped right into it, full steam ahead, all twenty right there in front of me.
That's what we call stupid. You can call it ambitious; I call it stupid. But I'm having fun. I really am having a lot of fun. And a lot of you are, too, and that's awesome. Thank you.
Anyway... Back on topic: Do you prefer AJ/Dan or Nick/Ashley? Do you support Trevor's fan love for Kevin or are you waiting for Brian to tear into Jacob? Are you rooting for Chris to find happiness with Trevor or for Dan to rescue Justin? Are you feeling Lance's frustrated love for Howie, or are you waiting for Justin to find his way back to Kevin? Do you want Lance to forget Howie and try Brian, or do you want to see if one day AJ and Justin's words will come to match the ease and familiarity of their bodies?
Is it me, or are there too many choices?
You can find all four polls here.
September 9, 2005
I love Blue. I love Blue and I love Lee. (Matthew cuts ramble short, to spare you all the fan chatter.)
Diamond can't read S48 without ranting about Jacob. Then again, she rants about Jacob a lot. Try not to mention his hair in her presence. Or his new group. Or his personality. Or anything about him, at all. Although you can feel free to bring up Dan. Or, you know, Justin. Or her new love, Howie. (Howie's not new. But he is officially her favorite Backstreet Boy. I would say that she has good taste and she chose a good one, but, hi, it's Backstreet. You can't make a wrong choice.)
(For the record, I love Jacob. So nyah.)
September 7, 2005
September 4, 2005
Status check:
For a number of weeks now, the overwhelming mandatory overtime (12 hours each weekday, plus time on Saturday) has been lifted, and I've been working normal hours like a regular human being. However, overtime is about to be reinstated, and I don't know how long it'll last.
I've been working on short stories for the other site. Check them out when you get a chance.
I've been working on "Sucker." I'm far enough ahead at the moment that it's not a pressing issue to keep up, so while I would love to write "Sucker" incessantly, I can give it a break to work on other things.
I've put up a few stories around here recently, which has been nice.
I've come up with Grand Scheme #27 for the other side, but first I'll have to write my next novel, so Novel #2 is in the planning stages. (I keep coming up with a different premise, but maybe this time I have one I'll stick with.)
My laptop turns itself off at random and sometimes doesn't turn back on. To work around that lovely little problem, I'm doing the bulk of my writing on another computer. Computer #2 is not mine, so I have to save everything I write on a friend's jump drive and travel back and forth with it. It also doesn't connect to the Internet and, of course, I can't update either site from there.
I'm months behind in my e-mail, and my Juno subscription ran out. I'll try to remedy some of that, and I apologize to everyone who's mad at me.
So, overall, I'm writing steadily, but I'm not as available as I'd prefer to be.
September 1, 2005
Happy September.
Good news! I didn't fall into a mud puddle today. That's what I like to call "not repeating my mistakes." Although I still have the bruise from yesterday.
August 30, 2005
I still can't get over it. That was the most incredible night ever. Awesome, awesome concert. I'm still dazed.
August 29, 2005
Backstreet's back.
That was the best concert I've ever been to.
That was one of the best days of my life.
They sounded amazing. Their choreography was amazing. They really seemed to be having a whole lot of fun up there. The crowd loved every second of it.
They looked fantastic.
I would love to go again. I wish that I could go again. I can't explain to you what an incredible experience that was.
They need to come back. Seriously. They have to come back and visit Texas, at least. Memphis? Come down here, guys, please. Can we circulate a petition or something? How can you skip a whole region of the country? We love you, too! We want to see you!
If you have the chance to get to at least one show, take it. If you don't have a chance, find a way anyway. Once can never be enough, but at least I went, and I had the experience.
#*$&@(, I want to go again. Just thinking about it makes me want to jump up and scream.
Awesome, awesome, awesome show.
I love Backstreet.
August 26, 2005
I ordered Dan's new CD on-line today. It's at CD Baby. And I visited his new site, which I think (searching my memory) is at myspace.com/danmillermusic. Just thought I'd let you guys know.
Is it Diamond's fault that I have a crush on Dan? Or is it because I want to see more AJ/Dan? Or is it because secretly I'm rooting for Dan and Justin's love to triumph? Seriously, I'm out of my mind, because there's no way for Dan to escape "Sucker" alive (don't take that literally), but I want him to make it. I love his friendship with Justin. I love his fire with AJ.
Diamond supplies me with most of my Backstreet information, interviews, etc. Thanks to her, now I've seen the Backstreet Boys' new MTV "Diary." Oh My @#@ $%$ ^&^.
!
Wow. I say to you: wow. Would it be wrong to quote my own characters and say that I'm experiencing a full-body tingle?
Let's bring it all down to this: the Backstreet Boys are happy. They're happy. They are happy. They're happy and they're together.
Backstreet Boys. Happy. Together.
They're animated. They're giddy. They're having fun.
I'd explain how happy their happiness makes me, but you've probably figured that out by now.
August 24, 2005
Anyone want an update on what the guys from O-Town are doing now?
I know you do!
According to SapphireMoon13's Drewboard post, Erik's dating a soap opera actress.
Dan just launched a new Yahoo! update list (Dan_Miller_News) and says he's putting out a five-song album. (He just ended his summer tour with Jeff, Jordan Knight, etc.)
Trevor is now Tre Scott and has a new site where you can hear three songs. They're good songs, especially "Sin City." (myspace.com/trescott)
Jacob, of course, has Jacob's Loc. (jacobsloc.com)
I have no idea what Ashley's doing. But I'm sure that, whatever it is, he looks good doing it.
August 22, 2005
Happy birthday to The One Who Touched Me!
(Pause for birthday wishes, thoughts of praise, and general worship of The One Who Touched Me.)
And now, on to someone not of Backstreet but still special.
Did I mention that Aaron's black flip-flops had something shiny on the straps? You know, the thong part, it had, I don't know, rhinestones? Diamonds? Something silvery and shiny. (The boy has bling on his sandals?)
When Aaron was signing autographs, there was a guy who worked at the arena standing on Aaron's side of the barrier, completely in our way. Obscuring our view of AC. We kept trying to ask him to move, but he wouldn't budge. So we awkwardly peered around him for most of the time. The table had a sort of red plastic tablecloth, and Aaron wrote his name on it. At one point - - did I mention this earlier? - - while he was waiting for the next person in line, he yawned and doodled on his autograph. After he left, we went back to the table and, lo and behold, the guy who'd been in our way was there. We asked him if we could have the tablecloth, since Aaron had signed it. He said, you want that? Really? We said, yes, absolutely. He said, well, you can't have it now, because other people will be here later signing autographs, but if you come back later, maybe you can get it.
So we went on about our day.
And, at the appointed time, we went back. Ryan wasn't going to go, but I insisted that we had to go, because yes, okay, the tablecloth, the table, the guy, the signature, one or all four of those things would probably be long gone, but it wouldn't hurt to check. After an adventure in parking which I won't bore you with, we went back into the arena (they didn't even bother to ask us for tickets or anything) and the tablecloth, the table, the guy, and the signature were all there. Actually, the autograph had been cut out of the cloth, which made us panic for a second. The guy had cut it out and set it aside for us. So, now Aaron's signature is mine. And he doodled on it. Excellent.
Even though initially the guy blocked and thwarted our attempts to adore Aaron, later he hooked us up with an official autograph, so from now on I have only kind words for him.
August 20, 2005
Aaron Carter touched me today.
The Alltel Arena hosted a Kidz Fair today. I went with someone we'll call Ryan. We got there in time to watch some kids doing martial arts demonstrations. After that came some cheerleaders, whose performance can only be described as chaotic. Then came the Price Crew, four brothers of varying ages who performed two original songs, a Jackson 5 medley, and "Pop." They didn't sing "Pop," they just did the official choreography to *NSYNC's track. It was cool to see those moves again.
Then, it was time for Aaron Carter. The set-up was simple: Aaron, a guitarist also named Aaron, two stools, and a microphone. Aaron had on flip-flops, so I got some nice naked feet, and a baseball cap that he never took off. (Baby, don't obscure your face.) He sang, "To All the Girls," "Do You Remember," a new song, and "Saturday Night." The original song, he wrote himself, but he's not confident enough to play the guitar and sing at the same time. He was completely relaxed onstage. The crowd wasn't big enough or loud enough, but Ryan and I sang along, and applauded, and screamed.
Can I say how absolutely weird it is to sit down during an entire performance? I'm used to standing up, jumping up and down, dancing around, etc. I felt inhibited by the crowd.
After the performance, there was a brief autograph session. We ran to get there (Ryan was trying to make me knock over small children) but the line was way too long. (People had left to get in line during the show. Um... Rude much? Like Aaron can't see you walking out on him?) Instead of standing in line, we went back to the front of the line and stood in front of the blocked-off area, right in front of the table where Aaron sat to sign autographs. We just stood there and watched. He was relaxed, smiling, friendly, fun, encouraging... He was really nice and open with everyone, from the oldest to the youngest.
Then he had to go, because he has a concert in Myrtle Beach tonight, and he had a plane to catch. The guy announcing that Aaron was about to leave had a bullhorn, and Aaron took the bullhorn from him to say good-bye to the line of people who were still waiting. I didn't know which way he was leaving the building, so I kind of flailed around, and in the process I lost Ryan. I finally spotted Aaron, and was about to go in that direction, when Ryan ran up to me. Aaron saw Ryan singing along during the performance, and hugged him. Aaron hugged Ryan. If Aaron saw Ryan, he definitely saw me, so I rushed over in Aaron's direction, trying to plant myself in his way. I almost missed him entirely; all of a sudden he was getting into a lift, with security people in between us and him. He looked around to wave good-bye to everyone, and he saw me, and he recognized me, and when I put my hand out, he put his hand out, too, and reached past security.
Aaron Carter touched me today!
Ryan got a hug which included a close brush against Aaron's stubble.
I'm writhing in envy. But, Aaron saw me, and Aaron saw me during the
show, and Aaron touched me, and whoo-ha!
The funny part was, when we were standing there watching him sign autographs, a woman beside us turned around and asked us how old he is. I said 17; Ryan said 18. I said, hello, 17, and Ryan said, well, someone wrote something that made it seem like Aaron was 18. Who, me?
This excitement makes me sound like a little fan girl. But, hey, being a fan makes me happy. It's great, it's a gift, to have something in my life that gives me this lift. This is a natural high that I can experience every time I play a CD. You can't top that.
Also, um, my apologies to everyone I trampled in my effort to reach Aaron today. Those hospital bills, they're totally covered.
August 19, 2005
Dallas directed me an excellent article that 1.) only fueled my Aaron crush and 2.) informed me that Jeff Timmons was, for at least a while, Aaron's opening act. Jeff and Aaron. Let's ponder. (We all ponder quietly to ourselves.) Aside from the fact that a.) Jeff is too old for Aaron and b.) Aaron's so skinny, Jeff could snap him like a twig, I see some unexpected possibilities there.
But, oh well. Too late now. I'm once again a member of Aaron Anonymous, where we pledge not to slash young folks.
Aaron will be 18 in a few short months. By then, I'll be, what, 27? So, while Aaron will be of legal age, I'll still look like a lecherous perv. But you knew that about me already.
August 18, 2005
I love the Backstreet Boys so much, I keep writing about O-Town and *NSYNC and Aaron Carter. Yeah, that makes sense.
I keep watching the "Just Want You to Know" video.
Also, thanks to Diamond, I keep watching B5's "U Got Me" video. It's five guys. They sing. They dance. What's not to enjoy?
Highlights of the first few episodes of season two of "Making the Band": looking at Ashley; Erik handling very personal situations very well; Dan and Trevor pointing out that Jacob being hard to work with gives the whole group that reputation; Erik waking up Ashley to talk about his phone call with his dad, and Ashley getting emotional ("in a manly way") about the fact that Erik's sharing with him; Ashley talking about how early in the morning it is and Erik telling him that it's one o'clock in the afternoon; "the Trevor train done passed you by"; Erik asking his father to explain certain comments; Ashley saying that he prefers being called handsome to being called beautiful; Dan saying that the group's in awe of Jacob's voice; Dan being concerned about being given Jacob's solos; Ashley defending Jacob to everyone he can find; Ashley throwing up backstage; the guys getting excited about hearing their single on the radio. Ashley's only been shown in the shower once so far, but the camera went so far down his back we were almost watching his butt.
(You got a crack shot, didn't you? I know you did.)
If you'd like to buy copies of O-Town's "Making the Band," playlife99@aol.com has all three seasons for sale.
August 15, 2005
Backstreet Boys! Backstreet Boys! Backstreet Boys!
I watched TRL today, to see the Backstreet premiere. Favorite moment of the hour: "Who is that woman and why are you trying to swallow her?"
August 11, 2005
Diamond found someone on-line selling tapes of "Making the Band," all three seasons. As soon as I get the site URL from her, I'll let you guys know where it is, in case you're interested in watching O-Town sing and dance and fight, all in various states of undress. I haven't even finished watching the first season, and I've already seen Ashley in the shower four times.
The guys hug a lot. Quite nice.
Man, do I have opinions about these people. Opinions on the guys who made it, on the guys who didn't make it, on family members, on girlfriends, on management and handlers, on everything and everyone. But I realize that these are real people, and even if I don't like someone maybe you watched the show and you do like that person, so I won't rant about the people I'm not fond of.
I love Dan. I love Dan! I love Dan! The guys were going through one bad thing after another, they were at a low point, there was chaos, there was drama, there were doubts, everything was a mess, and then Dan arrived. Dan showed up with positive energy and a big smile and a serious work ethic. He's nice and he's respectful and he has a lot of common sense. He's a great motivator, he leads by example, he gave the guys a perfect push in the right direction, just when they needed it most. He works hard. He learns fast. He's action-oriented. He doesn't say negative things about people even with motive and opportunity. The things he says, the things he does, the way he carries himself, the way he handles situations - - Dan is mature at heart but a whole lot of fun. He pays attention. He approaches people with respect. Now I'm just repeating myself. But, dude. I love Dan. I love the way he talks. Stop me before I ramble forever. But the way he is with the guys - - and the way he is when it's just Dan and the camera - - it's like Dan is here to get the job done, Dan is here to work, Dan is here to make this happen, and as long as it's getting done, he's going to have as much fun with it and everyone else as he can. I love it.
I also love Jacob. Ashley is a perfect person, and totally selfless, and too easily victimized. Apparently, I need to write Trevor crying more often, because he really does cry a lot. He's emotional, he's open, he's expressive, I love it. And Erik is fun, I can't help it, I'm a huge fan.
I never could decide how I felt about Paul. Mike and Bryan, terrific people, very talented, mature, dedicated, absolutely should have been in the group. Bryan seems like he belongs in musical theater. I feel terrible that they didn't make it, and for their sakes, I wish that LMNT had been more successful.
Although, if Mike and Bryan had made it, then other guys who are in the group wouldn't have made it. And there would definitely be no Dan. And everyone loves Dan.
Just as O-Town was being asked to sign contracts, the guys saw TV news reports about *NSYNC winning the lawsuit against Lou. Crazy timing. At least it made them more wary before they committed to anything.
So far, I've really liked: Dan's girlfriend; the way Jacob and Erik both handled the girl with the racist comment; Trevor's family; Dan's parents; getting to stare at Ashley for hours; how expressive Trevor's face is; the fact that Jacob's younger brother looks just like him; Ashley eating ice cream with an orgasmic expression and accompanying noises; Trevor being Jacob's best friend and trying not to be jealous at Jacob and Erik bonding over songwriting; Ashley's mascara running when he cried; Dan "dropping his hat"; Dan's expression when he talked to the camera about Erik being sick and not going to bed; Trevor ushering Erik into the hotel room to talk to Dan about not going to bed; assorted references to Backstreet and *NSYNC; the joke Jacob made that sent Erik running to the corner to laugh; Jacob falling off of his chair when the girl hung up on his brother; Ashley being really strong when he talked to his father; Trevor's work ethic; Erik pushing on Ashley's head and stomach to get the note out of him; all of the various good things that the decision-makers said about Jacob, because he was a shoo-in and I'm quite proud. And I love that each one of them, independently, chose Dan. And I love how Jacob just walked away after the "you're a lab rat" conversation, although I can't help but think that the argument was staged - - not on Jacob's part, but on Mark's.
"Making the Band" is just like "The Real World." Although there's less alcohol.
It really bothers me that they made and recorded good music, good songs, that never made either album. It could be just my bad judgment, but there are songs that didn't make the cut that were better than songs on the album. And that makes no sense.
August 8, 2005
We all know what today is. It's JC's birthday. It's Drew's birthday.
Now I'm getting "Slice" ideas. Stop doing that to me!
I've been getting a lot of writing done lately. A lot of "Sucker," of course. A bunch of new short stories over at the other site. And I'm working on more new short stories for this site. Very exciting.
Just to prove that I can't stick to my own decisions, I'm writing another Aaron story. Diamond told me that this is the last one. Although, there's really no point in stopping now, because as soon as I stop he'll be eighteen, and - - ow, ow, ow! I'll stop, I'll stop! (Tell Diamond to stop beating me.) And I shouldn't tell you that I'm writing an Aaron story, because chances are that now that I've announced it, I'll never finish it. For some reason, whenever I tell people that I'm working on something, I invariably get distracted by another story and never finish the first one.
The other day, I was looking at my "Sucker" banners, trying to decide which one to put up, and I thought to myself, "Why don't I have any happy 'Sucker' banners?" Sigh. Stupid question.
August 6, 2005
I'm going to see the Backstreet Boys! In concert!
As I may have mentioned earlier, I saw their smaller, pre-album tour twice. When they announced their dates for the real tour, there weren't any in my area. There's no way that an entire world tour would just skip, for example, Texas, so I said, okay, they'll do parts of the USA, go to other countries, and then come back here after that, and I'll see them then. But, even assuming that they'll be back, that's a long time to wait. The Backstreet Boys can't be on a US tour without me! So, I'm going.
I'm going to see the Backstreet Boys!
I'm going to see the Backstreet Boys!
August 5, 2005
I have a list of "Sucker" songs, songs that would fit really well into a "Sucker" soundtrack. Backstreet's "Safest Place to Hide," for example, is a great Justin/Dan song. I was listening to Linkin Park's "Faint" yesterday, and it struck me how perfect it is for Lance. Or for Justin, when he trashes Trevor's car. Of course, as soon as I had the "this song is perfect for 'Sucker!'" revelation, I realized that it was already on my list. Apparently I'd already had that revelation, who knows how many weeks earlier.
I feel good about things lately, because I've managed to update both this site and my other one with several new stories. Quite exciting. New long stories and a "Slice" over here, new short stories over there. Many more stories are on the way.
I won't name names, but someone told me that she hates Brian in "Sucker" and she wants to dump his body in the Everglades. Apparently, she thinks that Brian in "Sucker" is mean, or evil, or something. I don't know where she got that idea. Brian seems full of love to me. He loves the Backstreet Boys, he loves Chris, he loves Jacob, he loves Lance... How could anyone that generously loving possibly be a bad person?
Side note: I'd like to talk to Erin the bannerist. Erin, if you're out there, please e-mail me! I have good things to say to you. It's not vitally important or anything, but I have some compliments to pass along.
August 3, 2005
If you want to save the world, go here for a few places to start.
August 1, 2005
Happy August, everyone!
Happy birthday, Ashley!
Many new banners from Vanessa today. Thank you, Vanessa!
The Drewboarders (with a big push from Vanessa) are trying to revive the board after the recent attack and the ensuing loss of posts. Such brave little toasters. Or, brave little posters. Go help them; they're good people.
July 29, 2005
Happy birthday, Diamond!
Happy birthday, "Living!"
Woo-hoo!
July 28, 2005
Three things.
1. Is it true that JC was in the front row of the Backstreet concert today?
2. Did anyone who went to see Jordan and/or Jeff in concert also happen to see Dan? Did anyone know that Dan was performing on that tour? Did anyone see Dan? (Dan Miller. From O-Town.)
3. In "Sucker," in my head, there's an island in the middle of O-Town's kitchen. (The Townhouse in "Sucker" is loosely based on their real house from real life, only it's nicer, and bigger.) Diamond says that since I haven't mentioned the island, it doesn't exist, and I can't create it now. I say that it's always been there, so I can include it in upcoming parts of "Sucker." She says that I have to stick with the world I've created, and if I can't give them an extra sofa, I also can't give them an island. I say, I may not have mentioned it, but that doesn't mean that it's not there. What do you think? Island or no island?
Maybe I should post all of this on the Drewboard so that you can reply to it. Well, too late now, it's already here. Hmm. Okay, well, if you have thoughts, comments, questions, concerns, information, or complaints about any of the above, go ahead and post them on the Drewboard. Because, JC at a Backstreet concert? Dude, um, wow. Is this a mere rumor, or do you have proof?
July 25, 2005
You know, I spend so much time thinking about pop stars, it shouldn't surprise me that sometimes I dream about them. And occasionally I dream about two of them in bed together. But I have no idea why last night the two boy band members in bed together were Jonathan Knight and Donnie Wahlberg.
July 13, 2005
It's finished! The banner archive has been completed. I owe Brenhamella a huge debt of thanks. I honestly can't express how grateful I am. Let's all applaud!
July 12, 2005
Thank you to everyone who's helped out in the research department! You guys are terrific. It's really generous of you to help me out. I got some really valuable information and some great poetry!
I can't thank you enough. If anyone else wants to go over and add more information, more poetry, etc., go for it!
July 11, 2005
Just so you know, there's a bit of a punctuation issue with S39b. I wanted to add quotation marks around the lines when Justin echoes what Dan recites, but someone insisted that I take them out, because they complicate the reading process. I caved under pressure, but I still maintain that I'm right, and the quotation marks should be there. So, if the lack of them bothers you, I'm on your side.
July 8, 2005
What a productive day! A "Sucker" update over here, a new little short story on the other site to get back into the swing of things, and a new Drewboard forum.
Yes, a new Drewboard forum, where Matthew begs for help. The forum is here. The explanation is here. If you could please help me out with this, I will be forever appreciative.
July 6, 2005
I just read the list of who's going to be at Challenge for the Children this year.
Aaron!
Oh, Aaron!
I love Aaron. And Benji's going to be there! (Benji Madden from Good Charlotte. The facially pierced twin who's not the lead singer.) And other good people.
*NSYNC. Together. All at once. Five of them in the same place at the same time. It's like magic.
July 5, 2005
According to the banner archive, there are 312 "Sucker" banners. Now, Brenhamella runs the archive, and I trust her, and I looked through the banners and saw the 312 for myself. Still, am I alone here, or is it hard to believe that there are 312 "Sucker" banners?
All of the bannerists must be thanked for their contributions. I don't like to act like I favor some bannerists over others, because they're all terrific people and I truly do appreciate every banner. But I'd like to thank Vanessa specifically, since she made about two-thirds of those banners herself.
On another subject, I haven't had time to watch The Lord of the Rings recently, but the movies are deeply ingrained into my psyche. I can tell, because elephants look small to me. Every time I see an elephant on TV now, it looks oddly miniaturized. Elephants are small. How strange.
July 4, 2005
Busy weekend! I haven't had as much time to write as I'd wanted, but I've been very productive in other areas of life. Back to work tomorrow. Alas.
July 1, 2005
It's July now. Happy July.
To start the long weekend early, we only worked eight hours today. I barely know what to do with myself. An eight-hour workday? No work on Saturday? No work on Sunday and then all of Monday off, too? Inconceivable.
June was Backstreet month, what with the album coming out and the Boys being all over TV. I've been informed (by a completely biased person) that July is *NSYNC month, since Challenge for the Children is being held in a few weeks. So, hooray for *NSYNC. I guess we should all sing "Pop" in celebration, or something, although that would disrupt "Climbing the Walls," which is what I'm playing at this moment. Hmm. Dilemma.
Oh, also, I don't know if you clicked the link on the boyslash page or not, but here, go look at this. It's "Sucker" wallpaper by Diamond, and I like it. (Warning: if you read this post at a point in time after July 1, 2005, that page may hold something completely different.)
June 29, 2005
Apparently, since July 4th is a national holiday for U.S. citizens, I won't work on Monday. I find this hard to comprehend. No work? A day off from work? Working 12-hour days and 6-day weeks has left me baffled when it comes to the concept of taking a day off.
I shall use my time wisely: I shall write porn. Because I'm a free, American citizen.
(I'm still confused about not working on Monday. Maybe I'll double-check with my boss.)
Hooray for free American citizens! Hooray for the independence to worship as we choose and speak as we like and vote as we want! Hooray for the equality of all citizens! Hooray for the rights of all people!
Hooray for nationally recognized unions between two consenting adults.
I keep writing more about that, and ranting, and then deleting it. Do I need to rant? You all know my stance on marriage. I believe in equality and freedom for all law-abiding people. And I think that a few laws may need to change. (Matthew begins to rant, then deletes.) How many laws are based on gender differences? I really can't think of any off of the top of my head. Men and women can vote, pay taxes, drive cars, rear children... Women can wear what are traditionally considered to be "men's" clothes, and vice versa. Are we legally barred from each other's public restrooms? Men can be shirtless in public and women can't, but that law seems based in biology as well as morality. Or maybe not; I'll have to think about that one.
Men and women who marry each other are legally, federally recognized as entering into unions; men who marry men aren't, and women who marry women aren't. Depending on which state you live in, if you're 16, or 14, or 12, you can marry someone of the opposite sex. But one forty-year-old woman can't marry another forty-year-old woman. Because obviously 12-year-olds have the judgment skills to make the right decisions about marriage, but consenting (voting) adults don't. Of course, 12-year-olds probably need parental consent. Can lesbians marry if their parents are okay with it?
June 27, 2005
(Author's note: You may want to read this bit of Mattbrain after you've read S37b.)
Here's how easily conned I am.
I was reading S37b, making sure that it didn't have any glaring typos before I posted it, and I got to the part where The One Who Touched Me is telling Erik about James. I started to read every word with great interest, searching for clues, like maybe it was code for his relationship with Lance, maybe I could figure out how he felt about Lance, maybe he was dropping hints... Stupid, stupid Matthew. First of all, The One Who Touched Me is way too good to do that. (Isn't he?) Second of all, didn't I write that scene? Haven't I written this whole story? Don't I know better?
He got me. He really got me. I've embarrassed myself. I fell right into the trap. In "Sucker," The One Who Touched Me is all mysterious, practically begging everyone to try to figure him out, and I fell for it just like everyone else. Sigh.
I can't believe I've brought in The Return of James. And there was already a scene where Chris mentioned Brian, pixies, and glitter all at once. What's next? JC and Justin hooking up? The sudden appearance of Drew? (That would be interesting. Maybe Drew should arrive. He might be the only person capable of bringing Brian under control.)
June 25, 2005
I love Backstreet.
Here is my official message on the current state of the Drewboard, following the ezboard attack. I know that a lot of people are disheartened, but don't let that stop you from posting.
I've been thinking about adding a new Drewboard forum. Expect to see it shortly, as soon as I resolve my inner debate.
June 20, 2005
Brenhamella is working on restoring the banner archive. Let's all wish her well! She has my thanks for accepting this task, especially in light of the recent ezboard attacks. She's a hard worker, too. Conscientious. Good things.
Speaking of banners, I picked up a new set over the weekend, so check them out as they appear around the site. Special thanks go to Vanessa, Alla, and Leslie Lee.
It's very frustrating that I had to scrap three parts of "Sucker." I don't want to complain about it, but: argh.
June 17, 2005
My new mantra: I am mature. I am growing as a writer. I am mature. I am growing as a writer...
I've been writing along, writing along, getting nicely ahead in "Sucker." Then, all of a sudden, I realized that several parts back, I'd taken a wrong turn, and the entire story has been off course ever since. You know what that means: I have to scrap several parts of "Sucker" and pick up from the wrong turn. Which means that my comfortable lead is now less comfortable.
The recently written parts will not be entirely deleted. I'm going to set them aside. Maybe I'll get to use them later in the story. If I don't get to use them within "Sucker" itself, I'll post them later so you can see, for your own edification, what might have happened had things gone a different way.
None of this affects the parts of "Sucker" already posted. Everything through S36 stands as it is.
Let me tell you, it's kind of hard to scrap entire parts. It's several weeks of writing, down the drain. But I want to do what's best for the story, and I'm not entirely comfortable with the direction that the story's taken. So, I'm being very mature, and putting the good of the story above my own convenience. Applaud me, won't you?
Also: I love the Backstreet Boys. Buy Never Gone.
June 16, 2005
I seem to have been badly misinformed. I kept being told that the Backstreet Boys were taping their CBS "Early Show" stuff one Friday and airing it the next Friday. According to everything I heard, we'd be able to see it tomorrow. But, apparently, it aired yesterday, and I missed it all. How could this happen? Why?!
Buy Never Gone. Then buy it again.
June 15, 2005
Great news: some of the old Drewboard posts are back up. Bad news: some are not. Ezboard is still working on it; cross your fingers.
I love Never Gone.
June 14, 2005
Today, Never Gone was released. After work, I went right out and bought it. Several times, at several stores. Then it was time to drive around outside the city, learning the songs, singing along, screaming randomly. There are some fun songs and some angsty "hey, this reminds me of 'Sucker'" songs. The title track, "Never Gone," has great emotional impact. Emotional resonance. This is a great album. Every time another song comes on, I'm like, oh, oh, it's this song! Turn it up!
I bought both the regular version and the dual disc version, which is a CD on one side and a DVD on the other side. The DVD includes the "Incomplete" video and some behind-the-scenes making of "Incomplete" footage. You get to see the guys hanging out, playing around. AJ's shirtless. Nick's not wearing underwear; he sits down on the ground to roll around and get his jeans dirty for the shoot, and gives us a nice little view of his half-naked butt. Okay, you do realize that of the possible 100 boy band members I could name, Nick Carter has the most luscious butt? And he's showing it to us?
Now that I've discussed Nick's naked rear, I can't think of anything else I wanted to tell you. Nick has rendered me thoughtless.
Oh, Brian has on a wetsuit under his clothes in the video. I'd love to see Brian in a wetsuit.
Listen for the long pause when Kevin says "burnt.......out forest." Kevin's a slow talker.
I love that The One Who Touched Me still calls himself "Howie D."
Kevin discussing his own eyebrows amuses me.
Kevin and AJ imitate Macho Man Randy Savage. Brian does Fire Marshal Bill, and AJ does James Brown, at Nick's request.
Brian can golf in the dusty desert while wearing white and remain spotless.
I'd like to recommend that, if you haven't already done it, you go and check out Backstreet's AOL sessions. Excellent quality. Nick sounds great on "Weird World."
Do you know what makes me happy? The Backstreet Boys are happy. Have you seen them lately? They're smiling. They're playing. They're laughing. They're happy. It's beautiful. Seeing them happy makes me happy. Kevin's practically giddy.
Buy Never Gone. Buy it to support Backstreet. Buy it for the music. Buy it for Nick's butt. Buy it for shirtless AJ. (According to AJ, Kevin has bigger guns. I wonder what else AJ thinks about Kevin's body?)
June 13, 2005
Tuesday: buy Never Gone. Support Backstreet. Show your love.
June 10, 2005
My beautiful, wet Backstreet Boys were on the "Today" show this morning. The new album is out on Tuesday! Buy it and all of your dreams will come true. Their "Behind the Music" on VH1 finally premieres on Monday. And apparently concert tickets are on sale, so that's somewhat exciting.
June 8, 2005
I'm excited. On the set of "As Long As You Love Me," when Nick's playing with Brian's hair, The One Who Touched Me is signing something for a fan. It's his picture from a limited edition "Quit Playing Games" single with Backstreet postcard things. ElizabethK just gave me that single. Not the one that The One Who Touched Me signed, but still, excellent. ElizabethK is a good and generous friend. Merchandise is cool.
June 7, 2005
If the Drewboard is restored, everything will continue as normal. If the Drewboard is not fully restored, we have two options: use the existing Drewboard but without the benefit of the old messages, or start a new, fresh board on this site.
There's also the possibility of setting up the banner archive as a separate entity, on its own board.
I'm considering all options while I wait to see what ezboard can do about restoring our old posts.
June 6, 2005
It's so hot, walking across the room makes me sweat. Sitting still makes me sweat. I can't remember the last day that wasn't the case. I'm giving in, I'm breaking down; it's time to turn on the air conditioner. Is it this hot where you are, or has my house specifically shifted closer to the sun?
According to the daily updates, ezboard is still working on restoring the Drewboard. All I can do is extend sincere apologies to all of the Drewboarders. We've had years of fun and feedback and even some bonding, and I'm very sorry that the proof of it is being taken away from us. All we have left now are the memories. Will you sing with me? "Memories..." Um, I don't know that song. Hmm. "Memory, all alone in the moonlight, something something, I like cats..." You know, in my youth, I went to shows on Broadway several times. Now that I'm older and live farther away, Kevin and Drew and Joey and Aaron and everyone else have decided to flock there. Great timing. Nice. Good. Thanks. Appreciate it.
Oh! I remember more words. "All my days in the sun." "A time I knew what happiness was." It's coming back to me!
(I was posting S34b today, and I realized that it has a lot of sex and very little plot. Everyone's having sex. It's boy band members gone wild. So, if you're in the mood for a quickie, go on over and read.)
June 5, 2005
I can't take it anymore!
My grammar isn't perfect. I confuse the lay/lie thing consistently. But things are getting out of hand.
Correct: You're supposed to use proper grammar.
Incorrect: You're suppose to use proper grammar.
Correct: We used to use proper grammar.
Incorrect: We use to use proper grammar.
In these contexts, "supposed" and "used" are correct. "Suppose" and "use" are incorrect. This mistake is showing up in books, now, and I can't take it anymore. If you're supposed to have done something, if you used to do it, you're not "suppose" to have done it, you didn't "use" to do it. I don't know why this d-dropping is making its way into common usage, but it's making me crazy.
June 4, 2005
The Drewboard is still messed up, but it's back now. It sounds like ezboard is still trying to restore lost data, so cross your fingers that we'll get our messages back.
June 3, 2005
I wrote a poem today, intending to use it in "Sucker." It's terrible. Sigh. Back to the drawing board.
June 2, 2005
Well, ezboard is experiencing some serious problems, and the Drewboard is suffering for it. I don't know if or when they'll recover the lost data. Right now, the most recent posts available are from February, 2004. The "Living" forum has suffered some losses, the banner archive was hit heavily, and the "Sucker" forum is gone. (Actually, the last time I checked, the entire Drewboard was gone, but I hope that it'll return, at least in part.)
Apologies to all of the Drewboarders for these losses and complications. I love your discussions and it's always great to hear what you think.
I'm counting on the board coming back. However, Diamond's looking into the possibility of using another board, on-site instead of off-site. I'll let you know what we decide.
May 31, 2005
There's a problem with the Drewboard (forums seem to be missing), but ezboard is working on it, so thanks for your patience.
My vacation was great! Thanks for asking. Had a great time. I didn't write while I was gone, so I have a lot of catching up to do! Also, since I was away, things are backed up at work now, so overtime is still going strong.
My mysterious benefactor is a terrific person.
It looks like Brenhamella is our new banner archive helper. Everyone give her a nice round of applause. Assuming that I get a chance to check my banner e-mail this weekend, she'll have some fun work ahead of her.
May 24, 2005
I'm packing to go. You all be good until I get back.
May 23, 2005
I'll be out of town for a few days. Remember, no "Sucker" update this Friday, but you'll get a full installment of part 33 next Monday or Tuesday.
If my in-box fills up, I apologize in advance.
Thank you to everyone who responded about helping me with the banner archive. I already have several generous offers, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
May 21, 2005 updated
I checked my banner e-mail today. WOW. You guys are going to see a lot of fantastic new banners around here! I've finally collected them all from my in-box; now I'm uploading them and putting them into the archive. I'm going to add some wallpaper threads to the archive, too.
Thank you to adam, Alla, brenhamella, Julienne, Leslie Lee, turlough, and Vanessa! You guys are amazing.
The new wallpaper threads are located here, here, and here. If you notice anything missing, please let me know.
I've been asked how I name banners. Prepare yourself for a fascinating explanation!
Each banner name has several parts. (For years, my method was somewhat haphazard, but after I constructed the archive, I started to pay more attention to what I was doing. Then, when I found myself with dozens of "Sucker" banners from Vanessa, I developed an official system, just to keep track of everything.) All banner names are completely lowercase with no punctuation or spaces.
The first part of the banner name is the artist's name: adam, alla, vanessa. (Leslie Lee is just leslie, for simplicity's sake, although when I put up her banners, she's credited as Leslie Lee.)
The second part is the story title: sucker, destiny, together. Longer story titles sometimes are shortened - - "Where You Belong" can become wyb, and "Loving Blind" might be loving. (I no longer name a banner after "Living," because that can get confusing; I try to use the actual story, like "Together.")
The third part of the banner name is who's on the banner: a banner featuring Brian would be brian. Sometimes to avoid overlap, especially in a crossover like "Living," Nick Carter might become nickc and Nick Lachey might be nickl. For "Sucker," a lot of banners have pairings or threesomes. For the sake of a uniform system, I name the Boy first, then the Sync, then the Town. A banner featuring Ashley would use ashley, while a banner featuring Ashley with Nick and Joey would be nickjoeyashley.
For an example, this banner:
is
diamondsuckerchris.jpg. If I already had a diamondsuckerchris
banner, I would add a word or two from the banner's quotation, like
diamondsuckerchriskidding.jpg. If Brian were in this banner, it
would be diamondsuckerbrianchris.jpg, and if Trevor were in it, it
would be diamondsuckerchristrevor.jpg.
Sometimes an artist makes a banner series. If that's the case, I put the common thread somewhere in the banners' names. A series of Nick site banners would all be vanessasitenickblue.jpg, vanessasitenickgreen.jpg, etc. A series of green "Destiny" banners would be turloughdestinygreenaj.jpg, turloughdestinygreennick.jpg, etc.
I told you it was fascinating.
Updating the banner archive took hours today. Sometimes it's a two-minute thing; sometimes it's longer. When I get banners, I save them, I reply to the bannerists, I put them into the proper files, I update the "Sucker" on-site archive, I update the two "new banners!" pages, and then it's time to update the Drewboard archive. I love banners, and I love to spend time with them, but I really should spend more time writing. I'm trying to develop time-saving techniques. So...
Would anyone like to volunteer to update the banner archive for me? Just the Drewboard archive; the rest of that site stuff I can do myself. It's a very simple process, believe me; it's pretty repetitive, once you get the hang of it after the first thirty seconds. I will be happy to give you excruciatingly detailed instructions. Any takers?
(Personally, I like to do everything myself, because I'm kind of obsessive-compulsive about some things and I want to be sure that it's done exactly right. But this is a really simple process, and I've been told to find someone else to do it for me so I can spend more time writing and less time bannering.)
If you'd like to volunteer, it might help you to know that sometimes I check banners every week and sometimes I don't get to it for, well, months, to be honest. So sometimes you'll get a few banners every few days, and sometimes you'll have long stretches of complete freedom. It's not at all a time-consuming thing in and of itself; it's just that it takes me a long time because there are so many steps I go through before updating the Drewboard archive.
Please send an updated resume to... No, just kidding. Just e-mail me (matthew@matthewtime.com) and let me know if you're interested. If you're not, I'll harass Diamond and make her do it.
May 20, 2005
Overtime is fun!
This isn't as relevant now as it will be a week from today, but I'll tell you about it anyway. Today (Friday 20th) I'm posting S32, and on Monday the 23rd I'll post S32b. Then I'll be out of the state, so you won't get an update on Friday the 27th, but I'll give you all of S33 in its entirety on Monday the 30th or Tuesday the 31st. Okay? So, no new "Sucker" on Friday the 27th, but a double dose the following Monday (or Tuesday).
Now I have to shop and pack and plan and double-check things, to get ready for the trip. This is when having a personal assistant would really come in handy. I've been making lists of things to do, things to pack, things to buy, etc., but working everything in around my job (and my all-important writing) could be tough.
May 17, 2005
I was not selected for the jury. Which is a good thing, overall, although it sounded like an interesting trial.
Since I'll be out of the state over Memorial Day weekend, both that Friday and that Monday, I don't know if I'll be able to put out "Sucker" on May 27th and 30th. I'll let you know what I decide to do.
I'm writing a "Sucker" scene right now, and I'm not sure what to do. What's happening in the scene is good stuff, but it's slightly out of character, so I have to decide how to rein it back in without sacrificing the scene's momentum. Tough choices.
May 15, 2005
You don't want to hear about my personal life, and you really don't want to hear my political rantings. So, here are some fairly random boy thoughts.
I had to put a little thought into it, but yes, I can name the Moffatts. Or, I can reel off the list of names, but I'm not one hundred percent sure which one's which. Hmm. Gotta work on that. I know which one's Scott. Unless that's not Scott. (Is that Scott?)
I don't have a nickname for Kevin. I have (deep breath) the pixie, the panther, the elf, the Sex God, the sex toy (a.k.a. poor, crazy Justin), the straight one, The One Who Touched Me, Lancifer, and apparently at one point I decided that Nick was the superstar. But I have nothing to call Kevin. Besides, perhaps, the closet freak. (Why do I keep writing Kevin as sexually deviant?)
Five reasons I like Dan:
1. I'd never really paid any attention to O-Town; I saw them on a magazine cover once, I saw them performing "Liquid Dreams" once, and I paid zero attention to them. And then Diamond told me that I had to see the "We Fit Together" video just for Dan's blue eyes. So I saw the video. And I saw Dan's blue eyes. And I said, wow.
2. When Dan showed up on "Making the Band," he worked hard. Everyone else had been learning the songs and the choreography already, and he had to play catch-up, and man, he just walked in there and started working. He said that the other guys hadn't been taking the opportunity as seriously as he would have taken it. (Actually, he said, "as seriously as I would have tooken it.") Dan was there to work.
3. He's confident, not arrogant.
4. I really like the way he walked into the "Making the Band" house carrying those new clothes, saying that if it didn't work out the clothes were going right back to the store. Something about the way he said it told me that Dan was going to be okay no matter what, that his entire sense of self didn't hang on this show.
5. Dan knows who he is. He knows what he has to offer. He knew that they were casting a TV show and not actually trying to make a great vocal group. He wasn't bitter about that, he accepted it for what it was. Dan seems centered to me. Am I making the same point that I just made in #4? Okay, then the #5 reason that I like Dan is that the other guys chose him. And that he lisps.
Five reasons I like Erik-Michael:
1. When they're singing "Baby I Would" during their New York concert, during his verse, all at once several girls in the front rows throw white towels at him in unison, and he laughs. He kind of laughs and keeps singing and it's a funny moment, and I like it.
2. He showed up to CFTC at least two years in a row (once with Trevor, once alone) just to hang out. Just to be there. A friend of mine met him and Trevor while they were there two years ago, and then last year when she bumped into him again, he said that he remembered her. If it's true that he remembered her, very cool; if it's not true, it's a very nice thing to say.
3. During the "These Are the Days" video, there's a moment that kind of confuses me, and Erik looks at the camera like he's confused, too, so it always seems like he's asking, "Do you see this? What's going on here?"
4. He improved vocally between albums. Good work. I like that.
5. People actually call him Erik-Michael sometimes, not just Erik. You'd think everyone would just call him Erik and move on, since it's shorter and simpler, but they call him Erik-Michael, too.
Five reasons I like Ashley:
1. He's pretty. He's so pretty, the other guys notice it and call him on it.
2. Ashley likes to communicate. During one of their (backstage?) arguments he says something like, "I feel like we're not communicating anymore," which is just adorable.
3. They're all in a public restroom, yelling, and Ashley starts unzipping and moving to the urinal. Do they actually have to urinate in front of the cameras? He doesn't even seem to think twice about it.
4. Ashley is Jacob's sub.
5. I forgot my fifth reason, so I'll make up a new one. Regarding #1, I love how they talk about Ashley being the only one they showed in the shower. They all think it's funny. (Erik likes Ashley's pecs. Or, at least, he's noticed them.)
Five reasons I like Trevor:
1. Trevor has competed at CFTC at least twice. At least once, he brought Erik-Michael.
2. Trevor's competitive. (So's Dan, apparently.)
3. Trevor's sensitive. Trevor cries, and everybody knows it.
4. Trevor's empathetic. The other guys can to go him if they want to talk to someone who will listen.
5. I like the way Trevor moves onstage.
Five reasons (you knew this one was coming) I like Jacob:
1. You love Jacob or you hate Jacob. You're into him or you can't stand him. Everything that he does can be interpreted two ways. Is he standing up for himself or just being confrontational? Either he knows exactly who he is and he isn't afraid to show it, or he's floundering desperately for an identity and is latching onto the first one he's found. Seriously, I watched an episode of "Making the Band" with someone, and every sentence out of Jacob's mouth, I took it to mean one thing while the other person interpreted it in the opposite way. Jacob's just like that.
2. I like the frat boy look. The short, curly hair. (It was suggested to me once that Lou was trying to cast another Justin Timberlake. That's funny. How'd that work out for you, Lou?)
3. I like the mangy look. The dreads. (They look better in a ponytail.)
4. I like his voice. Other singers don't sound like that. (For a reason, Matthew? Shut up.)
5. Back to #1, I like his attitude. He isn't afraid to get in your face.
So, to sum up. Dan: Confident, centered. Erik-Michael: Funny, nice guy. Ashley: pretty. Trevor: sensitive, competitive. Jacob: confrontational.
(I'm about to bring two things into the conversation that I try to avoid around here for various reasons: religion and real-life women. Stick with me.) During "Making the Band," we got to see Jacob and Janie praying together, reading the Bible, etc. It seemed like this is something that Jacob does, and she supports him and keeps that in his life. Which was just ridiculously cute. And admirable. So I like her. But anyway, so Jacob's a religious/spiritual guy, and we all know that Brian is, too. So I figured, okay, here's something that they have in common. Except "Sucker," especially Brian in "Sucker," doesn't really mesh well with that, and it would be weird and even offensive if I dragged "Sucker" Brian into a church. I wanted to include that aspect of their bond without offending anyone. So that's why when Jacob's having a problem that's really getting to him, Brian asks him if he's prayed about it, and Jacob says yes, and the conversation moves on.
I have not seen "Making the Band" in its entirety. Since I'm writing a fairly long story about them, you'd imagine that I'd use that resource. No one I know actually has the show on tape or anything, so if I want to see the entire series, I'll have to buy it on-line somewhere. Diamond found one website selling it, except that person never got back to me, so I'm still on the hunt. If any of you kind readers out there have a copy for sale, please e-mail me.
May 13, 2005
The main boyslash page banner is Jacob because, well, read S31. The poor guy. (Or did he have it coming to him?)
I've been missing "Living" today. Nick and Brian and Drew being in love and having fun together. JC and Justin being in love and having sex together. All of the other guys. Sigh.
So. "Sucker" Nick. Is he in love with JC? With Joey? With Ashley? With himself? With someone else? Is he an arrogant jerk or just someone who tells it like it is? Or both? Should he surprise us all by turning around and falling for someone new in a later part? Who could that new person be? Justin? Jacob? Lance? Trevor? Chris? Erik-Michael? Dan? Maybe even...a Backstreet Boy? (Okay, at this point, I'm just talking to hear myself talk. I stopped asking serious questions about half an hour ago. But feel free to discuss it among yourselves.)
May 9, 2005
Site news... Site news... (Thinking.) Well, "Sucker" is being updated. S30b is up now. That's nice.
I would say that things have been slow around here lately, but I've been passing out new slash once (now twice) a week for months. So, really, that's fairly active. Thumbs up.
May 7, 2005
The "Sucker" home page hasn't been updated with the new link to S30, but that update should occur tomorrow (Sunday) morning. (Diamond runs that page for me. I don't want to touch it and risk ruining the glory of her artwork.)
Jury duty's coming up. I'm happy to serve my time like a good citizen and take part in our judicial system. I'm also apprehensive, since I've never done this before and no one's given me any details on what to expect. I guess I'll just show up and follow instructions.
Oh, I saw Kingdom of Heaven today. I was going to skip it, but someone saw a behind-the-scenes report on it and told me that it looked good, so I went. Good movie. Solid and satisfying. There's gratuitous nudity (Orlando with his shirt off for no real reason), and the love interest wasn't really in the way. (Although if you're into that whole het love thing, you know, good for you.) I liked the message of mutual respect and mutual mercy. And now I'm going to stop talking about it before I spoil the movie for those of you who haven't seen it.
Good stuff, though. I'll respect you if you'll respect me. We'll be nice to them if they'll be nice to us. Am I suddenly quoting Gollum?
It's warm again. Fans have been plugged in and turned on. Even bought two new ones, since one died last season. One of the new ones oscillates. Fancy.
Would I rather buy Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit or the 1990's edition of Trivial Pursuit? I already own Lord of the Rings Monopoly, so buying LOTR Trivial Pursuit would fit the theme. Not sure which to get. Must think further.
Writing "Sucker" is fun. I keep rooting for people and cheering for people and being scandalized by people. The One Who Touched Me tried to do something out of character but I had to rein him back in. Any word on the sofa count?
Orlando. Legolas. Paris. Balian. Two of those are cities, you realize. ("Orlando... I have a small, small idea.") You know why I think I enjoyed Kingdom of Heaven? Because I thought that I wouldn't like it, and I was really pleasantly surprised. If you go into a theater thinking yeah, cool, great, I can't wait, this is going to be awesome, and then the movie's not that good after all, you're like, ugh, that was awful. But if you go into it thinking, okay, well, I have other things that I could be doing, but it wouldn't hurt to look at Orlando for a few hours, and then the movie tugs you in, you're like, hey, wow, that was a really good time. I mean, seeing Orlando in a period piece with horses and swords defending a city isn't all that new. Defending Jerusalem/Troy/Helm's Deep/Gondor isn't all that different, when you get down to it. (Wow, I've watched Rings too many times. The lines are embedded in my brain. I hear Boromir's voice in my head right now.) But I really liked the characters in this movie. They really drew me in, in a short amount of time. I must like men of integrity.
I want to see Madagascar. But I'm strange, and I only like to support Disney animated features. Madagascar is from the Shrek/Shark's Tale people. I did see and enjoy the first Shrek, but I didn't see the second, and I didn't really enjoy Shark's Tale. Mainly because sometimes I'm open-minded and easily pleased, and sometimes I'm rude and negative and picky. But Madagascar looks like fun. I think it's the penguins.
The last time I mentioned a movie around here, it was Hitch, which has been a huge hit. I sure can pick 'em. Or else President Smith can.
You know what? I let someone I trust touch my laptop, and now my settings are off in at least two programs. That's just not right. What's happened to the world I used to live in?
I really should stop rambling now, because you all stopped caring, oh, ten minutes ago.
Summary: Read "Sucker." Watch out for warmer weather. Play a board game. Either watch an Orlando Bloom movie or Homecoming in Orlando; it's up to you. (There's also LFO's Live from Orlando, which I experimented with recently.) Think about penguins. Buy me something nice. Redecorate your bathroom. (Just throwing those last few in for fun.) Oh, and send Lance fan mail. After you've sent the Backstreet Boys their daily letter. You do send them love every day, don't you?
Update: Um, about that "men of integrity" thing. Balian did do something that I really don't agree with. Which I can't explain further because I don't want to ruin the movie if you haven't seen it yet. But I just want it on record that I don't agree with that thing. Bad, bad Balian. No cookie for you.
May 6, 2005 later that evening
It can be hard to decide where to break each part of "Sucker." Especially for the Friday-Monday split. I try to stop it at the halfway point, but that still leaves negotiating room. I have to decide if I should break it as close to the exact halfway point as possible, at some sort of time change (stopping the Friday half when they fall asleep and opening the Monday half when they wake up), at something that seems more like a cliffhanger... I like to keep it at the halfway point because I don't want you to feel shortchanged if you open a too-short part.
Here's an interesting problem. In the original draft of S30, there was a second sofa in the Townhouse living room. It's in later parts of the story, too. But there's contradicting evidence that suggests that there's only one sofa in that room, in parts of the story written before and after S30. So, apparently, sofa #2 shows up in S30, disappears, then reappears, at will. Also, the size of the sofa changes - - sometimes it can only seat 3 comfortably, while at other times there are 5 people on it.
Now, I, personally, don't at this moment have time to go back through 30 parts of "Sucker" to check on the number of sofas. If you remember a second sofa cropping up at any point, please post a note on the Drewboard and let me know where and when you saw it. I was told that it's probably not a good idea to add a second sofa this late in the story, and that acting like it's there but no one uses it (like the second upstairs bathroom) would be, well, unrealistic. (Wait, this story's supposed to be realistic?) I'll have to go through the post-S30 parts and take out the second sofa. I enjoyed its time in the story. I was fond of it. So were the guys. I think I'll name it Steve.
May 6, 2005
I'm making a few minor revisions to
S30, so it may not be posted until later this evening. But it'll be
out tonight.
May 2, 2005
There's this little cable channel - - maybe you've heard of it? - - called MTV. Music Television. Most cable packages carry it, I'd imagine. It has this cute little show called TRL, Total Request Live. It's kind of like a top ten countdown of popular music videos. You can vote for your favorite videos, and they'll play them. Since the Backstreet Boys are back, I thought that it would be really cool if we could vote for them - - you know, show our support - - and get them on the countdown. Wouldn't that be fun?
April 29, 2005
Hi, everybody!
(Excuse me while I say a very quick hello to Channy - - thanks for your idea! I never thought about that before, but it sounds interesting. It could be really cool. At the moment, I have no feasible way to make it happen, but it's definitely something to keep in mind and work towards. Also, have you checked out my other site?)
About "Sucker." People are bringing up interesting points on the Drewboard again. Clearly this is a good thing. If you're not up on the latest discussion, let me inform you.
(Ahem. Quick disclaimer. I in no way and by no means am even remotely suggesting that any of these people have the right take on anything. They could be one hundred percent correct or one hundred percent flat-out wrong. It's up to you to interpret how well these theories work for you.)
Drewboarders have been talking about "Sucker" Backstreet, and why Backstreet's evil, and what's going on between the Backstreet Boys. According to some people, it's possible that Brian and Kevin together are the Mighty Evil Duo (suggesting that it's genetic?) and that Brian and Kevin have taken it upon themselves to warp the previously innocent other Boys into the fine evil henchmen that they are today. Possibly Brian and Kevin did to the other Boys what they're now doing to the Syncs and Towns? (Or, possibly Brian started it all, as a lone evil mastermind.)
Anyway, brenhamella suggested that, if you accept the above theory, you might read "Borders" with fresh perspective, as something of a prequel to "Sucker." Sort of as a taste of what was going on when Kevin and Brian were training the other Boys before they all became evil geniuses together.
"Borders" is here, the current discussion is here (I may have butchered the discussion, so you should read it direct from the Drewboarders), and the overall "Sucker" board is here.
April 27, 2005
I saw the video!
Warning: the rest of this post will be about the Backstreet Boys and the "Incomplete" video. (Except for the very last line. Sorry.)
I saw the video! It's supposed to premiere on TRL on Thursday, which means that we all have to vote for it on an hourly basis.
It has to be hard to act normal and sing when there's stuff flying around in your face/at your mouth.
Kevin looks great. Kevin is an extremely handsome man. People shouldn't be allowed to look like that. It's not safe.
AJ, amazing. We're all fantastically proud of you.
Nick is overemoting. There's probably another way to describe it that doesn't sound like a criticism, but ever since it was said in "Living," it's been cemented in my head that way. Anyway, Nick's overemoting again, and his nostrils flare beautifully. Whoo-hoo!
The One Who Touched Me looks so so so so so so good, I want to applaud. The One Who Touched Me is a gorgeous man. Hot. With a hat! Pulling on clothesline! Pulling on clothesline shouldn't be hot, yet now it is. Thank you for that.
I'm not used to seeing videos where Brian doesn't have a solo. It's odd. It's unsettling. I miss him! Oh, my pixie, where have you gone? This has to be the first video where Brian's the Boy we see the least of.
The Backstreet Boys are back. With a video. New album, new video, new tour, there couldn't be better news. They're back. Do you understand? They're back. They're "oh my god we're back again" back. They're here. They're on our radios and on our TV's and back in our lives.
Vote for them on TRL or I will come to your home and beat you.
Was that too harsh?
Minor notes on the video. What is flying at Kevin? Snow? Nick's so hot that anything near him catches fire. Brian seems to have gotten confused and has decided that they're remaking "Drowning," while AJ has hopped in a car and driven to the middle of nowhere to relive "More Than That." I really like that things happen on beat. That's always a good thing in any video. When The One Who Touched Me does typically Nick things like falling to his knees or kicking at the sand, it throws me off, because I'm not used to him acting like that. Maybe they're rubbing off on each other. Did I mention how good everyone looks? Did I mention how awesome it is that they're making videos again? Did I mention that we all have to vote for it on TRL?
(Also, I like Aaron's "Saturday Night." Dancing boys are fun. I was told by an unbiased person that it's a hot song. Thumbs up.)
April 22, 2005
I saw a commercial for a new Mitsubishi called the Lancer. Lancer. Let's all get one.
April 18, 2005
Important "Sucker" news! I'm going to try a new way of posting "Sucker," beginning this Friday.
This Friday, I'm going to post the first half of part 28 as sucker28.html. Then on Monday, I'm going to post the second half of part 28 as sucker28b.html. On the next Friday, I'm going to post the first half of part 29 as sucker29.html and I'm going to put all of 28 together under sucker28.html. Then on the following Monday, I'm going to post the second half of part 29 as sucker29b.html.
Basically, instead of getting a full part each Friday, you'll get a half-part on Friday and a half-part on Monday. The first part each Friday will be under the regular sucker(partnumber).html and the second half each Monday will be sucker(partnumber)b.html. Each Friday, last week's part will be consolidated into one complete part instead of two halves.
This is an experiment. If I like it, I'll keep doing it; if it irritates me, I'll go back to posting a full-length part each Friday.
In unrelated news, I've been called for jury duty. I've never done it before, so I'm not sure how the process goes, but I guess I'll find out. I'll get to do my civic duty as an American citizen, so that'll be nice.
April 15, 2005
I have returned safely from my two-concert Backstreet extravaganza! Backstreet's back! All right! For one show, I had bad seats. Now, let me explain what I mean by "bad seats." It's not even fair to call them bad seats, because they were Backstreet concert seats, and I could see the stage, so there's nothing to complain about. Nothing. But, the seats were far in a high back corner, as far from the stage as they could get while still being inside the venue. From that vantage point, I had a more complete view of the stage as a whole, and could keep track of all five group members more easily. At the other concert, I had terrific seats, much closer to the stage, in the front. I could see all of the guys very clearly, in detail.
The choreography was terrific. They were tight, on beat, excellent. From my farther away/higher up seats, the interweaving thing they did a few times looked awesome. (They were walking around and in between each other quickly, so closely that one misstep could have caused a major collision.) The choreography for "Larger Than Life" looks especially great. I wonder, how much rehearsal do they need for old choreography? Just a few touch-up sessions to brush off the dust? They haven't performed these routines in years, but then again, they did them so often for so long...
They aren't wearing the exact same thing at every concert. They do wear the same thing all night, casual clothes with a white jacket and white hat that they take on and put off. They did the hat routine. How can you not love the hat routine? It's dancing! With a hat! The only thing better than that is dancing with a chair.
Harmony? Amazing. Perfect blending, as always. I really like that when they sing it live, the sound guy isn't necessarily tweaking them to the exact sound levels of the CD track, so you can sometimes hear a slightly different mix.
Maybe it's because this is a smaller tour with smaller venues and therefore a smaller crowd, but before and after the concert, the Backstreet Boys come outside by the buses. I'm not promising every single Boy every single time, but from what I've seen and heard, they're out there. Maybe just walking around/passing by, maybe coming up to say hi and sign autographs. Before and after. (You're most likely to see AJ, but the others are around.) At first, I scoffed at the idea, because really, how often does that happen? Dude, it happens. Don't scoff. Get out there.
The venues are smaller. Which means that you're almost bound to get good seats. One of mine was swelteringly hot; one was nicely air-conditioned. Oh, and the guys come out into the crowd. Nick comes first, and then AJ. So, if you're really up in the front (especially towards the middle) you may be in for an extremely good time.
AJ looked great. AJ sounded great. The guys like to touch his hair, and I have no problem with that. Honestly, all of the guys really seemed happy to be performing again; they were having a great time on stage. AJ especially was excited to be there; he had a lot of energy. It's great to see how much he loves performing. (At one concert, because the crowd was slightly less into it, the guys put out more energy; at the other concert, because the crowd was really into it, the Boys didn't have to work as hard to stay up.)
Brian loves to play. He just spent the whole time playing. Having fun. Being silly. Making faces. Doing physical comedy. And his voice, his voice, it sounded so pure... Also, he dresses Kevin for us onstage. Nice.
Kevin... Kevin was Kevin. He looked great and sounded great and was great. Kevin is maybe the perfect man. Shoving aside the whole "X dances better than Y" discussion, I'd like to say that choreography looks good on Kevin, maybe because he's long.
Nick is a rock star. He was throwing his mike stand around, he spent a full third of the concert on his knees, he even pulled on his hair. Oh, and he plays the guitar for one song. AJ and Brian have mike stands for that song, so Nick won't be the only one who has one, but you can tell that they're stifled and want to break free from the limitations of having to stand in one spot. It's terrific. Anyway, Nick's a rock star and I love him for it.
Howie shall henceforth and forever be known as The One Who Touched Me. He looked terrific. Watch him onstage. I love the way he moves. He's so smooth...
Oh, and Kevin Antunes is their musical director. Or head band guy. Or whatever. How can I be this man's new best friend? He tours with Backstreet and *NSYNC and Justin and Britney. There's a man with a good career. The only person I'd rather be more is Johnny Wright.
When you're at a Backstreet concert, please do as instructed. When AJ tells you to clap your hands, I am up and clapping. When Brian asks me to sing, I'm singing. Okay, so I sing along to every song, but I sing louder for Brian. How can I not? It's Brian. I've spent every day of the year for how many years being in love with these people, and now that I'm finally in the same room and they're actually asking me to do something, do you really think that there's a chance that I won't do it? We're talking about AJ McLean of the Backstreet Boys, standing in front of me, inviting me to clap along. I'm clapping.
At one point or another in life, I was told that it's extremely uncool to wear a Backstreet shirt to a Backstreet concert. Because I was young and impressionable, I believed it. I'm telling you now, don't believe it. You are at a Backstreet Boys concert. You bought the tickets and drove to the venue and bothered to attend: you're a fan. You own a shirt: you're a fan. You're here at the concert, and it's time to fan up. Wear that shirt. Wear those shoelaces. Paint your face and slap decals on your butt: you're a fan and you love the Boys, so be proud of it. Here's my question: where else are you going to wear the shirt? To an Aerosmith concert? To the grocery store? Not that you shouldn't wear the shirt to the store, I'm just saying, go ahead and wear it to the concert, too. We're all here to share our love. We all want to express our affection for the Boys. Let them know you love them. Let other fans know that you're showing your support.
Which leads me to something else I wanted to say. We can't take this for granted. I don't want to poke at any sore spots, but we all know that musical groups don't always stay together forever. The Backstreet Boys are here, right now, and they're singing for us, and they're performing for us, and they're on our radios and on our TV's and in our arenas. Show them love. Show them support. Buy albums, go to concerts. Request "Incomplete." Call one radio station every day; call five every hour; do as much as you can. We can't take this for granted.
The concerts were amazing. They really were. I had a blast. They performed hit after hit after hit, and they did several new songs. They even did "Shout." The new songs sound terrific, seriously. The songs sound great, and the Boys' voices sound great. Brian was drinking tea onstage. The One Who Touched Me sneezed onstage. I've never been so excited to see someone sneeze in my life. He sneezed! Onstage! And then looked apologetic about it!
There was so much to tell you that I've barely covered it all. There are some great fans out there. I met some very cool people, of both genders and various ages. (I was extremely polite and did not get into a fight over Nick with the guy sitting two seats away from me. I was extremely generous and let him pretend to have the higher claim to Nick. As if.) The Boys played around together onstage, singing together, touching each other, talking. I always wonder what they're talking about. The current song? The last song? The next song? The audience? What they had for dinner?
I'll admit that I'm biased, but I do believe that the Boys are good to their fans. They don't have to come out to sign autographs before the show. They don't have to come out after the show. I'm sure that there are plenty of other performers who do those things, but there are also plenty who don't. I really appreciate the Boys for taking the time to respect our love for them. Thank you.
I went to two concerts out of state while still managing to put in overtime at work. Do you know how I did it? I didn't sleep. For days. You know what else? It was absolutely more than worth it, and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I love the Boys. I had a terrific great wonderful amazing fantastic time at their shows. The concerts were wonderful. I love the Boys. Backstreet forever.
Backstreet's back!
The reason that there are rolling pictures of The One Who Touched Me and AJ on your screen right now? Because The One Who Touched Me actually touched me, deliberately touched my hand and told me that he loved me, too. And because AJ signed something for me, so I now have his personal autograph. So now there's a little graphic thing in honor of The Momentous Occasion.
Oh! Edited to add: Brian still fists! The One Who Touched Me still fingers! The One Who Touched Me still salsas! And, I didn't personally see him wink myself, but someone else saw it and told me. The patented wink! I love these guys. AJ was jumping in a circle. The One Who Touched Me spun around. Brian imitates fans.
April 8, 2005
There's no reason to announce this, because you've already basked in the glory of it by now, but: Diamond made a new "Sucker" page! Stay and watch the picture show. (Push F11 to fill the screen.)
April 7, 2005
It's almost time to see the Backstreet Boys! I keep feeling panicked - - it's too soon! I'm not ready!
April 3, 2005
"Anime" and "cartoon" are not the same thing. Perhaps I shall use the term "animated show."
April 1, 2005
So, did anything happen while I was gone? Did JC get another new haircut? Did Nick get another new piercing? Did Drew come out in a very special episode of "The Newlyweds?"
Call every radio station you've ever heard of and request "Incomplete."
(Warning: I'm about to talk about a television show, and I'm going to butcher it. Please, if you're Japanese or a fan of the show, understand that no offense is intended. I realize that I'm not an expert on this show, and you probably know a lot more about it than I do.)
There's a show called "Gravitation." It's Japanese, anime, and my first question is, where/how did this air on TV? It's not exactly Saturday morning content. It's very cartoonish, but it also features two men kissing and talking about being lovers. Not as a side plot, either; they're the main characters.
(To clarify: I saw a 13-episode set of this show, from beginning to end. Then it turned out that there was another version. To me, the version that I saw second looked at first glance like a second season or something, but I was told that what I saw second actually aired first. It's the OAV version. Anyway, for the most part, what I'm talking about is the version I saw first, because I'm much more familiar with it. Although chances are whatever I say applies to both, and I just don't know it.)
Starting over: there's a show called "Gravitation." A half-hour cartoon. Starring gay leads and three boy bands. Right up our mutual alley. (Netflix has it, if you're curious.) Once upon a time, there was a hugely, immensely, extraordinarily popular band, which I will call NKOTB. Three years ago, they disbanded, and the lead singer (Jordan Knight) went to the USA while the keyboard player (a blond man wearing a Debbie Gibson hat) started his own label, NG. (The third member of the group was a woman, so I guess they're not technically a boy band, but go with it.)
NG's new hot band is ASK, which I will call BSB. The brand-new, freshly signed to the label, opening act for BSB is Bad Luck, which I will call *NSYNC. The lead singer of BSB (Brian) and the lead singer of *NSYNC (Justin) are in love with Jordan Knight. They want to be him. He's their god. BSB does not like *NSYNC, the little upstart wannabes. Brian causes some trouble for Justin (and molests him, at one point) but that threat kind of disappears halfway through the series.
*NSYNC starts off as two people, Justin and his guitarist, Hiro, who is a terrific guy. They're forced to take on a third member, Fujisaki, a keyboard player who just happens to be related to Debbie Gibson, their label's president. Fujisaki is 16, and Justin's mad about that, so apparently Justin's a grown man, although he acts 16 himself. And looks it.
The guy Justin's in love with is Yuki Eiri, one of the few characters who's not in a band. The love story reminds me a lot of Justin/Brian on "QAF." Justin's young and in love and devoted and cannot stop running after Brian; Brian's bitter and rude and has no qualms about having sex with Justin and then rejecting him. Brian has a lot of angst, because of a traumatic past. And he's a writer. (In the version I saw, he writes novels, love stories. In the second version, he's a composer?)
Justin's very in love with Brian, and Brian's very dramatic and angsty. Justin's very emotional, constantly up and down, sobbing and then cooing and then bouncing off of the walls. Because the show is a cartoon, they do odd things, like turn into children, or turn into scribble drawings, or turn into cats. Also, can someone explain the costume thing to me? Justin had on a banana costume, a dog costume, a suitcase costume, a battery costume... At first, I was disturbed, but then it got funny. The suitcase and battery he explained, but the dog?
NKOTB's former manager becomes *NSYNC's manager. He's an American guy with a long blond ponytail. His name is K and he pulls a gun on anyone who gets in his way. It keeps Justin in line, sometimes.
Jordan Knight's my favorite character. He's insane. He's a legend, he's a god, and when he's onstage he's on, but offstage he's a raving lunatic. Eccentric genius? Silly. Crazy silly. Like, how does this man function without a keeper? But, for all of the craziness, he really likes Justin, and it turns out that he's fairly deep. And everyone loves him. And he carries around a pink plush bunny named Mr. Bear.
"Gravitation" as a fandom has one of the best songvids I've ever seen. It's Jordan and Justin doing "If You Were Gay" from Avenue Q, and it's very well-done.
March 26, 2005
Just to ease your concern, I'd like to state right here, officially, on the record, that no one in "Sucker" is going to die. I'm not into killing people. So if there are any overly ominous lines in the story, any threats, any dark references to death, don't get worried. One of my advisors keeps asking me if I should maybe tone down the language, so you guys don't start thinking that I'm going to kill off people. I don't actually want to change the language; I want the guys to be free to say whatever they want to say. But I also don't want any of you to worry. So, if someone in "Sucker" threatens to kill someone else, please don't worry about it. This isn't a flowers and rainbows and fluffy bunnies kind of story, but it's definitely not a death story, either. So, you keep that in mind, and I'll feel free to give the guys more rein.
March 23, 2005
Do me a favor and never let me forget how much I love Shakespeare.
March 22, 2005
Two announcements!
Announcement number one: For reasons both personal and professional, I won't be checking my e-mail until April 1st. That's only a week and a half away, so this isn't a catastrophe, but I decided that I'd better announce it publicly so that you won't sit by your in-box wondering why I'm not responding to your feedback. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't send feedback; it just means that my reply to your feedback won't be immediate. Of course I'll be posting "Sucker" on Friday and everything; I just won't be available through e-mail. This applies to regular e-mail and to banner e-mail - - again, let me emphasize, this doesn't mean that you shouldn't send me banners. It just means that you won't get a reply until later. And, yes, this applies to everyone. I want to be clear on that, so no one thinks that I'm making exceptions.
Announcement number two: Oh my #^$& I'm going to see the Backstreet Boys! See, they're having this small tour thing, and all of the dates I saw were taking place in parts of the country where I no longer live, and I started doing that "Why did I move away from places where the Boys have ten concerts within five minutes of my house, to a place where no one ever sets foot?" thing. ElizabethB was extremely generous and wonderful and invited me to go to a concert with her, but there would have been a plane trip involved and days off from work, and that's just not within my grasp. So I promised myself that when the real, official, grand tour began I'd be sure to go, and I tried to ignore the howling within my soul.
And then! Other dates were announced! Dates closer to me! I had to do a little bargaining with my boss, but I worked things out, and no planes will be involved, and I'm going to see the Backstreet Boys! Twice!
You know me. You understand that saying, "Hey, the Backstreet Boys are on tour and you can't go!" is like saying to Chris in "Sucker," "Hey, Brian's on the other side of that door and he'd love to see you but, oh, bother, the door's locked and I can't seem to find the key..." Chris and I just end up in huddled, pathetic masses on the floor, whimpering to ourselves. Now, hey, baby, the door's wide open and we're on our way!
I'm coming, Brian!
Except, you know, there's where the analogy breaks down. Because, clearly, the Backstreet Boys are not my former lovers who made me a complete psychological wreck and are now involved with my best friend. In fact, they have no idea that I exist. Which is a good thing. Because they might not approve of the whole "I write about you guys having sex and doing weird things" aspect.
I haven't seen the Boys in concert since... Okay, if this is 2005, then... I graduated in 2000, so... Okay, since the summer of 2001? Is that correct? Why does that sound wrong to me? Anyway, I haven't seen them in concert in years. Not since The Grand Summer when I saw the Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC and 98 Degrees in concert, multiple times. And now I'm going to see them! Twice! They're going to be in the same building I'm in. All five of them. And they're going to sing.
I'm a little stunned, still, simply by the mere concept of it. I've been wandering around saying, at random, "Nick's going to be there!" I mean, seriously, do you realize? Howie's going to be there. AJ's going to be there. Kevin's going to be there. Nick's going to be there. Brian's going to be there. How am I not supposed to lose my mind?
Oh... Oh... The first time I saw the Backstreet Boys in concert, I was on the floor in the back, and that rotating circle thing they stood on was really really close to me, really close, and AJ was right there, and... Man... And I'm about to go to two concerts, and AJ's going to be at both of them?
Last time I saw them, I was mid-"Living." Now I'm mid-"Sucker." So my perspective is slightly skewed. Not that I think that the Boys are anything like the way they're portrayed in either story. But since my brain is constantly in "Sucker" land, writing and plotting and thinking, a lot of my thoughts have an odd "Sucker" taint to them. I used to see Brian and Nick and wonder where Drew was. Now I'm going to see Kevin and wonder who's tied up backstage, naked and waiting for him.
March 18, 2005
(Matthew collapses.)
This has been a busy week. It's been one thing after another, nonstop. No time for e-mail. No time to write. (That "no time to write" thing should indicate how seriously busy I've been.) My brain is trying to get excited about hey, it's the weekend, tomorrow's Saturday, it's time for a break - - but, no, because I'll be working tomorrow. But, I'll have Saturday evening off, and all of Sunday. Let's see how much writing I can cram into that time. I might even squeeze some e-mail in there before I find myself with an uprising on my hands.
This is the first time I've even turned on my laptop in way too long. I'll have to spend all of Sunday melding with it to feel halfway normal again.
March 11, 2005
Let us wish a very happy birthday to Joel and Benji. Happy birthday! (Throwing confetti.)
Someday, I shall finish my Nick/Joel, Nick/Benji story. Because that's how I demonstrate how much I like someone, by writing about him having sex with Nick. Nick is my gift of love.
Sorry; my brain just wandered over to "Living" and the Drewsome. Let me drag myself back to the present. You know, I don't know if I mentioned this - - did I mention this? You remember that I wrote "Somebody," the Chris/Benji story, where they tape themselves having sex, and at the end they're talking about keyless handcuffs? The whole keyless handcuffs idea intrigued me, so then I wrote another story, which is on the other site. New people visiting the new site can read that story and have no idea that it originally came from me writing about Chris. Of course, that story has nothing at all to do with "Somebody," so it's not like they're connected. It's just that once I thought about Chris and Benji and handcuffs, well... Naturally, my brain wouldn't let that idea go without a fight. I'm not sure why I wrote a whole new story with new people, instead of letting it stay a Chris/Benji thing. Hard to say.
My brain has been harassing me with even more story ideas than usual lately. And someone's been trying to drag me into a new fandom, like I'm not already overextended. No new fandoms! Unless they're really good. Oh, forget it, anything with one cute guy gets my attention. I'm not known for my discriminating tastes. Is he a breathing male? Add him to the pile.
March 10, 2005
I was dreading February because something unpleasant was going to happen. It happened once, and I got through it bravely. I breathed a sigh of relief and moved on with my life. Now it's happening again! Now! Again! It can't happen now! That's not right! That's not fair! Can you hear my "argh" of frustration and displeasure?
I'm going to console myself and ease my pain by looking at banners.
Someday, the world shall feel my wrath.
(The problem I'm ranting about is work-related. It's frustrating and I'm unhappy about it, but in another week it'll be over, so by next Friday I'll be my usual sunny self again.)
March 8, 2005
Everybody please give a warm welcome to Julienne, our lovely new bannerist. A sample of her work is above. (I'm breaking my self-imposed "no 'Sucker' banners on the Mattbrain page" rule, but since I'm the only one who knew that the rule existed, maybe that's okay.)
March 5, 2005
Happy birthday, Gin!
Let's put up a Justin banner in honor of Gin.
Today's joke: Underwear walked up to a pair of socks and said, "I don't have a lot of time, so let me be brief..."
A few posts ago, I said something about not slashing Jesse McCartney. I've been asked about it several times since, so let me go ahead and explain further. (I love getting e-mail from people about what I've said on this page. Y'all are too much fun.)
Regarding Jesse McCartney: He's a very attractive young man. I've been
known to stare at his face in awe and wonder. But, part of that
"attractive young man" is the word "young." As in, too young.
Also, have you noticed that I'm not exactly giving you five new stories a
week? Time is always a factor. I already have so many stories to
write that I don't have time to pick up new subjects. I don't have
enough time to write about my current set of people; I don't need new ones.
Which is why I'm also backing away from Simple Plan. (Matthew thinks
fondly of Pierre.)
Also regarding Jesse McCartney: It's
slightly disturbing that he looks that much like Aaron. Someone tried to
tell me that Jesse's prettier than Aaron. My point is, the Aaron in question
is Aaron Carter, the brother of Nick Carter, and therefore it would be utter
heresy to suggest that any Aaron look-alike is prettier than Aaron himself.
Is Jesse related to Nick? I think not. Case closed. The Carter DNA reigns
supreme.
March 4, 2005
After I finished Off the Record, I had to decide what my next novel was going to be. I was torn between option 1 and option 2. I'd finally made my decision, and I had things settled in my head, and I was ready to go. And then I talked to Diamond. You guys shouldn't let me talk to Diamond. Why do you let me talk to Diamond? Now option 1 and option 2 have been shoved off to "potential novel #3" land and I have a whole new concept for novel #2. It's not Diamond's fault, really, because our conversation wasn't even about novel plots. She was just innocently talking, and my brain went, hey, wait, whoa, bing bing bing!
Anyway, so now I have a lot of planning and plotting and developing to do. But I have a concept I'm excited about. So, hooray!
February 28, 2005
Bad Matthew! February 25 passed without comment. How could this be? February 25 is Justin J.'s birthday! It's also Sean Astin's birthday. (I personally don't happen to have any Justin/Sean stories, and probably never will, but that has nothing to do with anything.) A great man like Justin J. deserves proper respect. So, we all wish Justin Paul Jeffre a fond, if belated, happy birthday. And the same to the talented Mr. Astin.
The next birthday on the list happens to be March 11th. Someone nudge me or something on the 9th so I don't miss it. Bonus points to those of you who know whose birthday is March 11th.
February 23, 2005
Charming.
I'm so irritated, I can't focus enough to write.
Unrelated: a list of musicians I've promised myself I'll resist the temptation to slash: Jesse McCartney, Simple Plan, Nelly/Tim McGraw. (I can't be the only person who's watched "Over & Over" and at least thought about it.)
February 19, 2005
Brian's birthday is tomorrow.
Of course we all know that this momentous occasion can never be celebrated properly, if only simply because of its magnitude. But, here are six handy recommendations, just for you.
Six ways to celebrate Brian's birthday:
1. Unplug/turn off all phones, put a "do not disturb" sign on the door, and spend 24 hours watching Backstreet Boys home videos. (In other words, do what you do every Sunday.)
2. Visit every store that sells music within fifty miles of your home. Buy every copy of every Backstreet Boys album in sight.
3. Throw a party. Cake, decorations, the whole works. Invite your friends so you'll have someone to throw confetti at. Do Backstreet karaoke. Exchange presents.
4. Sing a BSB song at top volume every half hour. Bonus points if Brian wrote it.
5. Compose your very own "Ode to Brian." Poetry is the preferred form, but anything is acceptable, including multimedia presentations and unwieldy sculpture.
6. Read every story on this site that has Brian in it. Days later, wander away from your computer in a daze, mumbling "pixie" under your breath.
February 18, 2005
Bosses who encourage employees to work 12 hours on a Saturday...shouldn't.
Happy birthday to Leslie!
A "Sucker" update from Alex:
Part 11
Favorite sex scene:
When Justin is allowed to suck Kevin's dick, tongue-fuck his hole, and come
in his mouth
Favorite mind fuck:
When Justin "finally" understands and believes that he's "worthless" and
Kevin is never going to love him
Part 12
Favorite sex scene:
When Howie's soft mouth and sleek tongue pursue, coax, and seduce a
hesitant, then pliant JC (resistance is futile!)
Favorite mind fuck:
When Chris determines that the DNA dripping down his throat--courtesy of
Kevin--is his closest link to Brian
Part 13
Favorite sex scene:
When Nick and Joey double-team Ashley on his stomach/back/side in the
bed/shower/floor all night to the extent that the "dickslut" blacks out
Favorite mind fuck:
When Erik offers to give another man head for the second time in one day
Part 14
Favorite sex scene:
When Lance yanks a panting Howie into place on his dick, fucking him fast
and forceful (do him, Lance!)
Favorite mind fuck:
When Erik promises he's going to get a groan out of Howie regardless of the
number of blowjobs it will take
Part 15
Favorite sex scene:
When Chris makes Trevor come in his pants after asking "How much thought
have you given to sucking my dick?"
Favorite mind fuck:
When it's revealed that JC once drove past Nick's house fifty seven times
February 15, 2005
Look at how easy it is to arrange the guys according to vocal range!
*NSYNC: Chris, JC, Justin, Joey, Lance
Backstreet Boys: Howie, Brian and Nick, AJ, Kevin
98 Degrees: Jeff, Nick, Drew, Justin
Whee! Wasn't that fun? Now, let's do O-Town!
O-Town: ... ... ... Um... Wait, I can do this. Dan and Trevor are in the lower half, so... Uh, Erik...
Why can't I do this?
Theory one: I'm stupid/I'm a bad fan/I'm not paying enough attention. (That really is a valid theory.)
Theory two: O-Town was assembled as a "Real World" cast and not for the purpose of creating great music. We know that Lou knows how to put a band together; he did it twice before with what we all like to call amazing success. But when it came to "Making the Band," Lou wasn't making a band, he was making a TV show. Now, I'll admit that because the world is an unjust place, I'm missing a few episodes of the show, so feel free to sneer at my great ignorance. But Dan was supposed to replace Ikaika, and as far as I can tell, Dan and Ikaika do not have the same vocal range. That suggests, to me at least, that they weren't trying to put together perfect five-part harmony.
O-Town is not at fault for this. They didn't choose each other. (They did choose Dan. They needed Dan. Everyone needs Dan.)
If anyone out there can put the O-Town guys in voice order for me, I'd appreciate it. You have my e-mail address.
More random comments on the vocal thing:
In my semi-extensive modern boy band research, I have found that Justin Jeffre has/had the best low voice. Justin gets deep. Much applause for Justin J.
As far the high voices go: I love Howie, because oh my god he's Howie. I think that Chris has an amazing voice and they should let him sing more often. (I feel very strongly on that point, but I won't go into the Chris rant here.) Jeff has a great voice. It sounds very...clear. (I'd mention that Darren Hayes could sing right over top of all three of them, if a.) this weren't a boy bands only discussion and b.) anyone cared.) I'm never sure which one of them is my favorite. Howie has to be, because oh my god he's Howie. But did I mention that I have a thing for Chris's voice? And Jeff doesn't get nearly enough credit. For much of anything, actually. Which is another rant I'll spare you from.
Also, maybe you noticed that I lumped Brian and Nick together. Frankly, (bad fan alert!) I'm not sure whose range goes from where to where. I'm guessing that Nick started out higher, but then he stopped being twelve years old, so maybe now he's below Brian.
February 13, 2005
Tomorrow is the big Day of Love. Go out there and love somebody.
You know who I love? Besides him. Besides him. Besides him. Oh, be quiet. I love bannerists. Why? Because there are 200 "Sucker" banners in the archive. So, today, we all give a warm round of hearty applause to: Diamond, Alla, MA, Meko, Lisa, Kita, Adam, Brenhamella, Lalig, and Vanessa. I'd like to thank Vanessa about 199 times, because she's made so many "Sucker" banners, I... I... There has to be a good way to describe it. Thanks to Vanessa, I have more "Sucker" banners than Ashley has sex scenes.
Oh, wait, it's 201, because I forgot to put up one of Diamond's.
Happy Valentine's Day. Hug a bannerist.
February 12, 2005
A transcript of last night's conversation between me and myself:
Okay, let's go.
No, I can't, I have too much to do.
You always have too much to do.
Yeah, but that doesn't mean it's not true.
Come on, you like movies.
Yes, I like movies, but I don't like mainstream romantic comedy date movies. They're trite and cheesy and boring and irritating and predictable and tiresome and full of cliches and besides, they're full of straight people.
But it's Will Smith. You have to support our future president. Besides, this is a mainstream romantic comedy with a black man as the lead. You have to go.
But... (Wistful look at laptop, where "Sucker" waits.)
You have to go. You promised. You made plans. You can't go back on your word.
Fine, I'm going, but only to support Future President Smith and the advancement of black actors in Hollywood.
So, I went. And I had a good time. Because Hitch happens to be good. It was a good, solid, funny, interesting movie. I kept expecting to be irritated by the same old stereotypical events, but that never happened. There were surprises, there were touching moments, and I laughed a lot. Every time I braced myself for the cheese, it didn't come. Did I mention that I laughed a lot? Because I did. A lot. And, I found myself getting invested in the characters' happiness. I had a good time. I'd see it again. And, bonus, they say, "off the record." Which amused me. Anyway, go ahead and see it.
In other news... Diamond was rooting around the Internet for, I don't know, something, and she found some clips from "Making the Band." She offered them to me, and I watched one, and my first reaction was, "I love Jacob." Her first reaction was, "I hate Jacob." Same clip, same thirty seconds, same specific event, completely opposite reactions. Apparently you either love Jacob or hate Jacob; there's not much middle ground.
February 11, 2005
How can a country be in Europe and not in Europe? There's Europe, and there's not-Europe; you can't be both. Did people stop making sense a long time ago, and I just failed to notice it until now?
Can't you just shove the border aside a bit?
(Maybe my problem is that I'm from the USA. We claim Alaska as ours. We apparently have no trouble ignoring where things are geographically, when it comes to determining who gets what.)
February 10, 2005 later
Oh, I know, I know! Working ten hours a week (and six hours on Saturday) really isn't enough. That gives employees far too much time to spend with their families. Really just not a good idea. And you really don't get a good on-the-job performance from your workers if they're not overstressed. It's much better to have them work twelve hours a day (and ten hours on Saturdays). Much better. Yeah. Good. Nice. I'm all for it.
February 10, 2005
Socks keep my toes warm.
ElizabethK has offered to inform me all about Turkey. Vanessa says that Turkey is not a member of the European Union. Since I know nothing about the European Union, I assumed that all European nations would be members. That makes sense to me; it's the European Union, it's a union of European nations, therefore if you're a country in Europe, you're a member. Apparently not.
(Read the next few paragraphs with the understanding that all points of view are valid, and I am absolutely cool with whatever your opinions are. Much respect to all people. I'm just thinking in public.)
Some people think that Paul Thomas is unslashable. Some people think that Justin Jeffre is unslashable. (Paul Thomas is Good Charlotte's bass player. If you don't know who Justin Jeffre is, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave.) So I've been thinking. There are, of course, people to whom I'm not sexually attracted. There are, of course, people about whom I choose not to write. But is anyone inherently unslashable? I don't know. I don't think so.
Maybe the problem is that we're thinking of slash in terms of hot sex. Slash isn't all NC-17 hard-core thrusting. It can be that, of course it can; I've written a sex scene or two, myself. But slash can also be dozens of other things, including humor, relationship exploration, or character study.
This is just my opinion after thinking about the subject for thirty seconds, but I think that when someone says, "Howie's unslashable," what that person may mean is, "I'm not attracted to Howie and I don't want to read about him having sex, when there are all of these other hot guys to read about instead." Which is valid; there are people I'd rather not read about having sex, too.
The thing is... Okay, let me take your brain to the scary place. Feel free to stop reading this right now. Right. Now. (It's not too late to turn back!) I will never write slash about Mr. Rogers. I just won't do it. Not going to happen. He's very high at the top of the "never ever slash" list. But, maybe someone else would choose to write about him in a tender G-rated character study about him and another older gentleman living out their last years together. Or, for all I know, someone's written about his wild younger days when he was twenty years old and into puppets. Who knows. Anything's possible.
Maybe that's my point. Anything's possible. We're all too different to rule out anything. You think that Howie (to borrow EK's terms) is creepy and winky; I love him. We're all different.
Why does my brain have trouble jumping into the idea of slashing Aragorn? Sam, Frodo, Merry, Pippin, Legolas, Boromir, Faramir, I'm all over them, I have dozens of story ideas. But Aragorn, no. I must not be that attracted to him. Which is odd. Because I'm attracted to everybody. Except Mr. Rogers. And his puppets.